Castle (TV Series)

Hell Hath No Fury (2009)

Stana Katic: Kate Beckett

Quotes 

• Kate Beckett : Don't you have a book coming out today or something?

  Richard Castle : Yeah. So?

  Kate Beckett : So, you are watching me do paperwork. It's creepy.

• [Castle and Beckett have discovered that Jeff Horn was having an affair] 

  Kate Beckett : And what was that girl thinking? That he would leave his wife and kids for her?

  Richard Castle : That is so sexist!

  Kate Beckett : How is that *so* sexist?

  Richard Castle : You assume that just because she's a woman, that she was after a relationship. Did you ever think that maybe she was in it for the sex?

  Kate Beckett : Yes I did... And then I saw him.

  Richard Castle : [looks back a the photo]  What was it that turned you off? That he was wearing a rug?

  [Castle feigns shock at what he just said] 

  Richard Castle : Too soon?

• NYPD Uniform Officer : This the guy?

  Kate Beckett : You heard, huh?

  NYPD Uniform Officer : Oh, everyone's heard. You really base your next character on Detective Beckett?

  Richard Castle : Every artist needs a muse.

  Kate Beckett : Call me a muse again, and I will break both your legs, okay?

• Kate Beckett : Oh, don't be mean.

  Lanie Parish : You deserve it. Getting a drink with me after work instead of getting your freak on with Writer-boy?

  Kate Beckett : Yeah, well, he is annoying, self-centered, egotistical, and completely...

  Lanie Parish : Fun? And take it from me, girlfriend, you need some fun. I mean, how bad can he be?

  Kate Beckett : [her phone rings]  Beckett.

  Richard Castle : Guess who's got a date with a prostitute!

  [Beckett raises her arms in frustration, as if to say "See?"] 

• Kate Beckett : This female detective of yours, exactly how much will she be based on me?

  Richard Castle : Well, she's not too bright, and kind of slutty.

  Kate Beckett : Right, so was that wise-ass or jackass?

  Richard Castle : Actually, that was jackass.

  Kate Beckett : Hmm.

  Richard Castle : No, honestly, you're not gonna have anything to be embarrassed about. She's going to be... She's gonna be really smart, very savvy, haunting good looks, really good at her job.

  [Beckett half-smiles] 

  Richard Castle : And kind of slutty.

• Kate Beckett : The 800 number is registered to a PO box from out of state. We're gonna have to get Cyber to track down the IP, see where it's hosted.

  Richard Castle : Well, what if the IP's out of state, too?

  Javier Esposito : We just coordinate with local PDs.

  Kevin Ryan : If they're willing to cooperate.

  Kate Beckett : Sites like these are designed to evade authorities. We'll get there. It'll just take us some time.

  Richard Castle : [dialing his phone]  Or I could just do it the easy way.

  Female Receptionist : [on phone]  VIP Liasons.

  Kate Beckett : Castle, what are you doing?

  Richard Castle : Hi! My name's Richard. I'm a very generous man looking to arrange a very special date with Tiffany.

  [realizing what he's doing, Beckett chases after him to get him to hang up] 

  Richard Castle : Just give me a call on my phone, which is 347-555-0179. Thank you.

  [he hangs up] 

  Kate Beckett : Castle, you can't just call and arrange a date with a prostitute.

  Richard Castle : Why not?

  Kate Beckett : Because we're the police.

  Richard Castle : No, no, no, no. *You're* the police. I'm just a lonely upscale gentleman looking for a date. Bet I find her first.

• Kate Beckett : Why is it always the "family value" guys that get caught with their pants down?

  Richard Castle : 'Cause the universe loves irony. And because most people are hypocrites.

• Richard Castle : Promise not to hate me.

  NYPD Detective Kate Beckett : I already hate you.

  Richard Castle : Fair enough.

• [Beckett learns the name of the character Castle is basing upon her] 

  Kate Beckett : What kind of a name is "Nikki Heat"?

  Richard Castle : A cop name.

  Kate Beckett : It's a stripper name.

  Richard Castle : Well, I told you she was kind of slutty.

• Richard Castle : This morning, with the body, I took a couple of pictures.

  Kate Beckett : [outraged]  You took photos of my crime scene?

  Richard Castle : Before you get mad, I e-mailed a couple of them to a friend of mine.

  Kate Beckett : You e-mailed them to a friend.

  Richard Castle : Well, not exactly a friend. She's my interior decorator. But then we slept together, so I don't really know what she is now.

  Kate Beckett : What the hell were you thinking?

  Richard Castle : I know, right? You work together, you think it'll be fun, but then it always makes things weird. It's a real cautionary tale.

  Kate Beckett : I'm talking about the photographs. Of the body.

  Richard Castle : What? No! I didn't send her pictures of the body. I sent her pictures of the rug. I thought maybe she might be able to tell me where it came from. And guess what? She did.

  [Castle looks into a hotel room where a maid is vacuuming] 

  Kate Beckett : That's the rug... That's the same rug.

• Kate Beckett : This isn't phone sex, Ryan. You don't just pay for the two minutes that you used.

• Kate Beckett : I just figured, if you're gonna bother me at my work, I should bother you at yours. That was, um... quite a reading. Very, um... moving.

  Richard Castle : Are-Are you making fun of me?

  Kate Beckett : "'Good,' she thought, as the wind gathered up her hair. 'No one will see my tears.'" How does wind gather up hair? I'm just curious.

  Richard Castle : Oh, you're telling me how to do my job.

  Kate Beckett : Irritating, isn't it?

• Kate Beckett : Your book is coming out today, and you are hiding.

  Richard Castle : No. Hiding would be building a fortress out of my comforter and then downing a fifth of scotch, but apparently that's considered unhealthy.

• [after Beckett informs a city councilman's widow of his death] 

  Richard Castle : Can't be easy, breaking that kind of news.

  Kate Beckett : Yeah, well, thanks for not making it a joke.

  Richard Castle : Hey, I'm a wise-ass, not a jackass.

• Kate Beckett : Conspiracy to commit murder is the same as murder, whether you were there or not.

• [Castle and Beckett arrive at the crime scene] 

  Javier Esposito : Detective Beckett. Jack Lifford and Hall Morrison. While moving in, they, uh, see a rolled-up rug sticking out of a dumpster. They figure it's their lucky day. They bring it home, only to find there's a prize inside.

  Kevin Ryan : Dead guy in a rug. Naturally, we thought of you.

  Javier Esposito : Yeah.

  Lanie Parish : .38-caliber. Close range. Killed him instantly.

  Kate Beckett : You got an ID?

  [Lanie shakes her head no] 

  Javier Esposito : Nah, pockets were empty. No wallet. No keys. No jewelry.

  Kevin Ryan : We figured a robbery gone wrong.

  Kate Beckett , Richard Castle : This wasn't a robbery.

• Captain Roy Montgomery : You got something?

  Kate Beckett : Jeff Horn, 48. Two-term city council member.

  Captain Roy Montgomery : Friend of yours?

  Richard Castle : I recognize him from the bus ads. He's running for re-election.

  Captain Roy Montgomery : Press is gonna be all over this. Does he have a family?

  Kate Beckett : Yeah.

  Captain Roy Montgomery : Well, let's try to notify them before the jackals do.

• Kate Beckett : He didn't arrive at the club until after midnight.

  Richard Castle : So what do we do now? Wait for his lawyer to show up?

  Kate Beckett : Actually, we follow other leads. It's something that we call "working".

  Richard Castle : Other leads? Good. Since we both know he didn't do it.

  Kate Beckett : Creason? What makes you think he didn't do it?

  Richard Castle : Isn't it obvious? All the evidence points to him.

  Kate Beckett : And that somehow makes him not guilty?

  Richard Castle : He's totally the red herring.

  Kate Beckett : The red herring?

  Richard Castle : An innocent character who appears guilty.

  Kate Beckett : I know what a red herring is, Castle. It's a literary device used in literature. In real life, we don't dismiss a suspect just because he appears too guilty. Besides, I thought you wanted to arrest him.

  Richard Castle : Yeah, because he's a tool, not because he's guilty.

• Richard Castle : I found this in the archives from his first run for office. See, Horn wasn't wealthy, but his wife came from money. She tapped into her family trust to finance his first campaign.

  Kate Beckett : All this time we thought that Horn was hiding his affair from his wife.

  Richard Castle : Yeah. But what if she knew about the affair? What if he got the blackmail money from her?

• [as Lanie is entering the morgue] 

  Kate Beckett : Hey.

  Lanie Parish : [startled]  Damn, girl, You scared me.

  Kate Beckett : Lanie, you're surrounded by corpses.

  Lanie Parish : Yeah, I don't expect the living after seven o'clock.

  Kate Beckett : Funny. Neither do I.