The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Irish Pub Formulation (2010)
Johnny Galecki: Leonard Hofstadter
Photos
Quotes
-
Howard Wolowitz : [learning Leonard slept with Raj's sister Priya] I would never do that. Unlike him, I respect you.
Leonard Hofstadter : [skeptically] Really. Was it out of respect that you didn't tell Raj about the time you dropped his iPhone in a urinal?
Raj Koothrappali : [in outrage/disgust] Dude, I put that thing on my face!
-
Leonard Hofstadter : I'm sorry, Raj, but the truth is I was with Priya last night.
Sheldon Cooper : Don't listen to him. He's still light-headed from all the Irish whiskey and pickled eggs in his system.
Raj Koothrappali : What were you doing with Priya?
Sheldon Cooper : [throwing it out there like it's no big deal] I believe they engaged in coitus.
-
[last lines]
Leonard Hofstadter : Can I have a snow cone?
Sheldon Cooper : Sure.
Leonard Hofstadter : This is pretty good. What flavor is this?
Sheldon Cooper : Guess.
Leonard Hofstadter : Papaya?
Sheldon Cooper : No.
Leonard Hofstadter : Guava?
Sheldon Cooper : You're so close.
Leonard Hofstadter : I give up.
Sheldon Cooper : Mango caterpillar.
[Leonard does a spit take and throws the snow cone in the garbage]
Sheldon Cooper : What are you doing!
[Leonard storms out]
Sheldon Cooper : You said you liked it.
-
Leonard Hofstadter : I admit it, I... I may have crossed a line here, but come on, Raj, your sister is a grown woman. And to her, I'm a forbidden piece of white chocolate.
Raj Koothrappali : [standing up to leave] I don't believe it. This is a terrible betrayal of my trust.
Leonard Hofstadter : No, no, no. Would it... would it help if I told you that I offered her my heart and she kind of stomped on it?
Raj Koothrappali : How hard did she stomp?
Leonard Hofstadter : Very hard.
Raj Koothrappali : [sitting down] Okay, I'm good.
-
Priya Koothrappali : Leonard, wake up.
Leonard Hofstadter : Huh? What? Uh, sorry.
Priya Koothrappali : For what?
Leonard Hofstadter : I don't know. When I'm in bed with a girl, it's my go-to response.
-
Sheldon Cooper : [Describing the fake alibi he has invented for Leonard] You met her at Pasadena's most popular Irish watering hole, Lucky Baldwin's, where Maggie spends her nights tending bar, with a head full of curls and heart full of dreams.
[Hands Leonard a bar napkin]
Leonard Hofstadter : [Reading handwriting on napkin] "Leonard, call me if you're interested in *coitus.* Sincerely, Maggie Mcgarry."
Sheldon Cooper : And if anyone were to actually call that number, they will hear this.
[plays recording]
Female text-to-speech electronic voice : Top of the morning to you. You've reached Maggie McGarry. Leave a message at the wee little beep.
-
Raj Koothrappali : You slept with my sister?
Leonard Hofstadter : Yeah.
Howard Wolowitz : How could you? We had a pact!
Raj Koothrappali : Excuse me, I think "How could you? She's my sister" takes precedence over a five year old pinkie swear.
-
Leonard Hofstadter : Okay fine, I'm, I'm a horrible human being. I'm the Darth Vader of Pasadena.
Sheldon Cooper : You're far too short to be Darth Vader. At best, you might be a turncoat Ewok.
-
Howard Wolowitz : As long as we're talking about betraying our friends, how about the month Sheldon spent grinding up insects and mixing them into Leonard's food.
Sheldon Cooper : Well excuse me, that was not a betrayal. That was an experiment to determine at what concentration food start tasting "mothy".
Leonard Hofstadter : You put moths in my food?
Sheldon Cooper : For science.
Raj Koothrappali : I can't believe you kissed my sister with moth mouth.