The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Ornithophobia Diffusion (2011)
Johnny Galecki: Leonard Hofstadter
Photos
Quotes
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Penny : It's not a date, Leonard. It's just a man and a woman hanging out, not having sex at the end of the night.
Leonard Hofstadter : Sounds like most of my dates.
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Penny : So what are you and professor Fussy Face up to tonight?
Leonard Hofstadter : Star Wars on Blu-Ray.
Penny : Haven't you seen that movie like a thousand times?
Leonard Hofstadter : Not on Blu-Ray.
[pauses]
Leonard Hofstadter : Only twice on Blu-Ray.
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Penny : We were going out, you were going to get sex anyway
Leonard Hofstadter : Really? You would've slept with me after a three hour documentary about dams?
Penny : No, no woman would
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Penny : I want to know what you told her.
Leonard Hofstadter : That's kind of between me and...
[looks over at Laura]
Laura : Laura.
Leonard Hofstadter : Laura.
Penny : Oh. Okay, I see. So while he was telling you things, did he mention he owns not one, but two Star Trek uniforms?
Laura : Really?
Penny : Yeah. Wears them. Not just for Halloween.
Leonard Hofstadter : Hey, pal. You didn't see me telling Kevin that you thought cold wars were only fought in winter.
Penny : Okay. Then I'll return the favor, and I won't tell...
[looks over at Laura]
Laura : Laura.
Penny : Laura... that half the dirty movies you own are animated.
Leonard Hofstadter : When you were telling Kevin about your acting career, did you mention your long-running role as "Waitress" in a local production of "The Cheesecake Factory"?
Penny : Did you tell her about your lucky asthma inhaler?
Leonard Hofstadter : Oh, yeah? Spell asthma.
Penny : A... s...
[pauses]
Penny : Take me home.
Leonard Hofstadter : Maybe I'm not done hanging out with...
[looks over the table and notices that Laura is gone]
Leonard Hofstadter : You're right. It's getting late.
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Penny : [about Kevin] He's cute, look at him with his dorky glasses and hipster shirts
Leonard Hofstadter : I wear dorky shirts and glasses
Penny : Yeah but when you're tall and have good cheekbones, you're doing it ironically
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Sheldon Cooper : Quick, what does a hawk sound like?
Leonard Hofstadter : Uh, I don't know... Scree! Scree!
Sheldon Cooper : Oh, please. That's a seagull.
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Leonard Hofstadter : [Wearing a t-shirt, jeans and a backwards baseball cap] Too casual?
Sheldon Cooper : For an audience with the Queen, yes. For an evening of passing a bottle of fortified wine around a flaming trashcan, you look great.
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Penny : Oh, hey. If we hurry, we can make the new Jennifer Aniston movie.
Leonard Hofstadter : Oh, yeah, sure. There's also an amazing documentary about building a dam on a river in South America.
Penny : OK, but the Jennifer Aniston movie has Jennifer Aniston, and she's not building a dam.
Leonard Hofstadter : Can't argue with that. I'll get the tickets.
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Leonard Hofstadter : We're not ready to hang out as friends
Penny : I don't know, up until the last part I was really enjoying take charge Leonard, knew what you wanted, picking the movie even a little cocky
Leonard Hofstadter : Then maybe I'm putting sex back on the table
Penny : Maybe I like that
Leonard Hofstadter : If that's what you like, I can be that guy, I can be anything you want
Penny : Goodnight Leonard
Leonard Hofstadter : [to himself] I am such an asthmatic dumbass
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Leonard Hofstadter : [after Sheldon freaking out about the bird] Sheldon, just ignore him.
Sheldon Cooper : Good idea! Attention is what birds want.
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Leonard Hofstadter : Do you think I'm overdressed?
Sheldon Cooper : Depends on the activity. For a prostate exam, yes. To play in Vegas, I'd add sequins.
Leonard Hofstadter : I'm going to the movies with Penny. I don't want her to think that I think it's a date.
Sheldon Cooper : Do you think it's a date?
Leonard Hofstadter : No. But she might think that I think it's a date even though I don't.
Sheldon Cooper : Or you might think she thinks you think it's a date even though she doesn't.
Leonard Hofstadter : Are you overthinking this?
Sheldon Cooper : Not at all.
Leonard Hofstadter : You're right. I'm fine. I'm wearing this.
Sheldon Cooper : Really? A blazer? All right.
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Penny : You like those movies
Leonard Hofstadter : No I hate those movies, I only saw them cause you wanted to and I wanted to have sex
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Leonard Hofstadter : [To Penny] Tickets are eleven bucks, not a date