Resident Alien (TV Series)
The Upper Hand (2024)
Alan Tudyk: Harry Vanderspeigle
Photos
Quotes
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Harry Vanderspeigle : You're leaving because I told you to leave.
Joseph Rainier : Uh, no. I just happen to want to leave so badly that I don't care about staying just so you don't think that I'm leaving because you told me to leave.
Harry Vanderspeigle : The only thing I understood in that was "leave."
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Harry Vanderspeigle : Humans do stupid things all the time. It is like their national sport.
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D'Arcy Bloom : Pull me up or I'll put a sign in the bar that says Harry Vanderspeigle kicks dogs.
Harry Vanderspeigle : I do not. Who tells these lies?
D'Arcy Bloom : Me, you idiot. I just made it up.
Harry Vanderspeigle : Oh.
D'Arcy Bloom : And people will believe me because you have a dog-kicking face.
Harry Vanderspeigle : I do not!
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Harry Vanderspeigle : Oh, no. The pizza's outside the trap.
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Harry Vanderspeigle : How did you get past security? His fortress is impenetrable.
Max Hawthorne : Door was unlocked.
Harry Vanderspeigle : Son of a bitch.
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Harry Vanderspeigle : Asta, do you prefer a confetti cake or a red velvet cake? I think pie, because if you are unable to finish it, I'll eat it.
Asta Twelvetrees : I'm gonna regret asking, but why?
Harry Vanderspeigle : Oh, there is a beautiful ritual on my planet that whenever we send off a volunteer on a suicide mission, we prepare for them a last meal.
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Harry Vanderspeigle : Humans spend their entire lives believing they are special. Even after they die, they do everything in their power to remain special forever- tombstones, plaques, old libraries with their names on them. Not long ago, the smartest minds on Earth believed the sun revolved around them.
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Harry Vanderspeigle : I have a joke for you. What has three heads and it has to get out of my house and it's you?
Leo : Us?
Harry Vanderspeigle : Oh, you've heard it.
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Harry Vanderspeigle : E.T. could fly a bicycle. E.T. had a flashlight for a finger. Do you know what it's like to be constantly compared to that waddling sex doll?
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Harry Vanderspeigle : Listen only to the sound of my voice. When you wake up, you will remember nothing of this, but you will still pay me for the hour.
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Joseph Rainier : [Harry crumples a parking ticket, lifts it above his head] Littering is a fifty dollar fine.
Harry Vanderspeigle : I know that. I'm... putting it in my truck.
[tosses it into his truck - laughs and pours his coffee onto he ground]
Harry Vanderspeigle : It's not littering if it's liquid.
[to himself]
Harry Vanderspeigle : Now I need to get another coffee.
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Mayor Ben Hawthorne : Hey, are you busy?
Harry Vanderspeigle : Yes, I'm in the middle of a thought.