Doctor Who (TV Series)

The Snowmen (2012)

Matt Smith: The Doctor

Photos 

Quotes 

• Strax : Sir, permission to express my opposition to your current apathy.

  The Doctor : Permission granted.

  Strax : Sir, I am opposed to your current apathy.

  The Doctor : Thank you, Strax. And if I'm ever in the need of advice from a psychotic potato dwarf, you'll certainly be the first to know.

• Clara : [Clara enters the TARDIS, for the first time]  It's smaller on the outside.

  The Doctor : Okay, that is a first.

• The Doctor : What are you doing here?

  Strax : Madam Vastra was wondering if you needed any grenades.

  The Doctor : Grenades?

  Strax : [thinking]  She might have said help.

• The Doctor : Don't be clever, Strax. It doesn't suit you.

  Strax : Sorry, sir.

  The Doctor : I'm the clever one. You're the potato one.

  Strax : Yes, sir.

  The Doctor : Now, go away.

• The Doctor : [to Strax]  Where is it?

  Strax : Where's what, sir?

  The Doctor : I sent you to get the memory worm.

  Strax : Did you? When?

  [referring to Clara] 

  Strax : Who's he? What are we doing here? Look, it's been snowing.

  The Doctor : You didn't use the gauntlets, did you?

  Strax : Why would I need the gauntlets? Do you want me to get the memory worm?

  The Doctor : [muttering]  You...

• Clara : Is there a kitchen?

  The Doctor : Another first.

  Clara : I don't know why I asked that. It's just... I like making soufflés.

  The Doctor : [pauses]  Soufflés?

• Clara : After you. I'm wearing a dress. Eyes front, soldier.

  The Doctor : My eyes are always front.

  Clara : [the Doctor climbs up the ladder]  Mine aren't.

  The Doctor : Stop it!

  Clara : No.

• Snowmen : You are not of this world; meaning Earth.

  The Doctor : Takes one to snow one.

• The Doctor : [to Strax]  Oy! Shut up, you're not clever or funny and you've got tiny little legs!

• Madame Vastra : You can't help yourself. It's the same story every time, and it always begins with the same two words.

  The Doctor : She'll never be able to find me again. She doesn't even have the name Doctor. What two words?

  [Clara suddenly pokes her head through the roof of the hansom cab] 

  Clara : Doctor? Doctor who?

• The Doctor : Multi-nucleate, crystalline organism with the ability to mimic and mirror what it finds. Looks like snow. Isn't snow.

  Dr. Simeon : You must leave here now.

  The Doctor : Shut up. I'm making deductions, it's very exciting.

• Alice : Captain Latimer! In the garden, there's snowmen! And they're just growing! Out of nowhere by themselves! Look!

  [she opens the door] 

  Madame Vastra : Good evening! I'm a lizard woman from the dawn of time and this is my wife.

  Strax : This dwelling is under attack. Remain calm, human scum.

  The Doctor : So. Any questions?

• [last lines] 

  Clara's Friend : [in a graveyard in the present]  Where are you going?

  Clara : Short cut.

  Clara's Friend : Through here? I hate this place! Don't you think it's creepy?

  Clara : [leaning on Clara Oswin Oswald's tombstone]  Nah. I don't believe in ghosts.

  The Doctor : [inside the Tardis]  Clara... Oswin... Oswald...

  [examines Clara's picture on the monitor] 

  The Doctor : Watch me run.

• Strax : I suggest a full-frontal assault with automated laser monkeys, scalpel mines and acid.

  The Doctor : Why?

• The Doctor : Talking snow... I love new things.

• The Doctor : What are you doing here?

  Strax : Madam Vastra wondered if you were needing any grenades.

  The Doctor : Grenades?

  Strax : She might have said help.

  The Doctor : Help for what?

  Strax : Well, your investigation.

  The Doctor : Investigation, who says I'm investigating? Do you think I'm gonna start investigating just because some bird smiles at me? Who do you think I am?

  Strax : [pauses]  Sherlock Holmes.

  The Doctor : Don't be clever Strax, it doesn't suit you.

  Strax : Sorry Sir.

  The Doctor : I'm the clever one, you're the potato one.

  Strax : Yes Sir.

  The Doctor : Now go away.

  Strax : Yes... Mr Holmes.

  The Doctor : Oi, shut up. You're not clever, or funny and you've got tiny little legs.

  [Strax walks away laughing to himself] 

• [tossing Dr Simeon's papers and seeing what is on top] 

  The Doctor : Most opened file, most viewed page... you know you really should delete your history.