- Cinema Snob: "Fun in Balloon Land" is supposed to be a kids movie that makes use of leftover parade balloons, but it's more like something a pedophile films in his basement after he lures in children with candy!
- Cinema Snob: And then they all went home and discovered LSD while the Balloon Indians cried over the mess that they made.
- Narrator Lady: Polly wants a cracker? Yell, "Crackers."
- Cinema Snob: Mmm, there's only one man who can perfectly yell out for "crackers."
- Admiral Crackers: Release the Crackers!