12 Nights with the Grulems (2017) Poster

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12 Nights with the Grulems: Amateurish cringefest
Platypuschow27 December 2023
Plot

Not copy and pasting that Bible length mess, you're welcome.

Cast

Richard Gething, in his directing debut who is more well known as an actor in small roles such as the horrendous Rizen (Can't wait to get round to the sequel *Sigh*) and equally awful Doll Master.

Verdict

Let's be clear, this is a short film not a feature. It stands at a smidge over half an hour and for all 31 minutes you'll hate yourself and Richard Gething in equal measure.

You see it's the old trope of paranormal investigators going somewhere and bad things happening. But because it's a third of the length of the average movie of its ilk it's badly rushed. Though to be fair this is probably best, time means character development and I really didn't want to see more of this lot who were positively intolerable.

The plot is disjointed to a frustrating level, unoriginal, messy, it looks offensively cheap and cannot stress how much I found myself hating this film.

Most bad films have a redeeming feature or something, even Scyfy, Uncorked, ITN........The Asylum! But this had nothing, it was ugly, it was cheap, the characters were dreadful, the direction would be laughable if it weren't so bad, the plot is non-sensical, the narration and on screen text is embarassing and the film brings absolutely nothing to the table.

Maybe it would have been better as found footage, or maybe it simply shouldn't have been made.

It also ends on a "Cliffhanger" and teases a sequel which by the looks of it isn't happening. Thank Jebus for small mercy's.

Rants

I know I'm getting pickier the older I get but still come on, there's a line. I'm not baby who expects the best of the best of the best everytime, I'm not child who expects mega budgets and familiar stars in everything I watch, I like indie films and watch countless and enjoy plenty BUT........there's certainly an increase over the past few years in movies made by people who have absolutely no place in the industry.

Breakdown

Ugly Plot makes little sense Cast are positively dreadful Goes nowhere and accomplishes nothing.
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