- Sheldon Cooper: Princeton. A fine institution. It's where Einstein taught. It's also where Leonard got his PhD, so it may have gone downhill since then.
- Sheldon Cooper: [Walks into an empty apartment by mistake] The Air Force did it again! They're erasing our lives!
- Leonard Hofstadter: [Sees number on door] Third floor. Wrong apartment.
- Howard Wolowitz: Although, if anyone's gonna clean out your apartment and disappear, it'd be Penny.
- Leonard Hofstadter: She might disappear, but she's definitly not going to clean anything.
- Bernadette Rostenkowski: So what happens next?
- Howard Wolowitz: It's phase two. We test it, perfect it, and hope to live long enough to see the movie based on our lives starring more attractive versions of ourselves.
- Leonard Hofstadter: Sir, I'm sorry, but I just don't get it. You came into our lab in the middle of the night and took our prototype and all of our research and didn't even tell us?
- Colonel Richard Williams: Sounds like you get it.
- Howard Wolowitz: Why would you do that?
- Colonel Richard Williams: You guys completed Phase One, we'll take it from here.
- Sheldon Cooper: Where did you move it?
- Colonel Richard Williams: I can't tell you that.
- Leonard Hofstadter: Are you implementing Phase Two?
- Colonel Richard Williams: I can't tell you that.
- Sheldon Cooper: Wait, so you're just going to take all the work we've done for the last year and toss us aside?
- Colonel Richard Williams: That one I can tell you: yes.
- Howard Wolowitz: This is all very upsetting.
- Colonel Richard Williams: I'm sorry to hear that. As you know, the primary focus of the United States Military is people's feelings.
- Sheldon Cooper: If that's sarcasm, please save it for our enemies.
- Howard Wolowitz: How can you work on something for a year and they just take it?
- Leonard Hofstadter: I can't believe the Air Force would treat us like that.
- Sheldon Cooper: You know, I have a good mind to stop paying my taxes. It's too bad I enjoy doing them so much.
- Sheldon Cooper: All my life I thought Uncle Sam was a friendly uncle who brought you presents. Turns out he's the other kind.
- Leonard Hofstadter: Are you excited to have your own place again?
- Raj Koothrappali: I am, but I'll miss you guys.
- Leonard Hofstadter: We'll miss you too.
- Raj Koothrappali: You could try saying that without smiling.
- Leonard Hofstadter: I'm trying. This is the best I can do.
- Raj Koothrappali: Come on, Sheldon. Amy's only gone for a few months. And now that I'm moving out, your old room is empty, so you can stay there whenever you want.
- Leonard Hofstadter: Raj, could I talk to you on the hall for a second?
- Raj Koothrappali: Sure.
- [Raj steps out, Leonard closes the door behind him and locks it]
- Computer: Leonard Hofstadter. Access granted.
- Leonard Hofstadter: I don't care if this thing's burning out my retinas. Makes me feel special.
- [First lines]
- Penny: Champagne, champagne, and for the world's tallest second grader, apple juice.
- Sheldon Cooper: No bendy straw. Some party.
- Sheldon Cooper: If you find yourself working with a male scientist who's as smart as me, as tall as me, and has hair like Thor, well then I want you to step away from the situation and call me immediately.
- Sheldon Cooper: I've never really lived by myself. What if I become strange and eccentric?
- Amy Farrah Fowler: I'll love you no matter what,
- Penny: Listen to me. Your relationship can handle being long distance for a while. It's not like you two are very physical.
- Amy Farrah Fowler: Hey, you don't know what goes on behind closed doors.
- Amy Farrah Fowler: A lot of lectures?
- Amy Farrah Fowler: Alright, so you know.