- Zach Dempsey: [to Alex about Jessica] What's up with her? Hasn't it been a few months since you guys...
- Alex Standall: Yeah, I guess it's a quick slide from "We can be friends" to "Don't fucking touch me."
- Nora Walker: Clay, my name is Nora Walker.
- Clay Jensen: Yes, I know who you are.
- Nora Walker: Clay, I know Bryce hurt you and some friends of yours. He's done some monstrous things, but he's my son. I don't excuse anything that he's done, but he's my child. And he might be lost, he might be hurt. Do you know anything that might help us find him?
- Clay Jensen: I don't, Mrs. Walker. I'm sorry.
- Principal Gary Bolan: [to Jessica] All right, look. Given how destructive and public the events at the homecoming game were, we're looking at a multiple-day suspension.
- Jessica Davis: Okay.
- Principal Gary Bolan: And I understand that there are some very strong feelings here and you and your group have an important voice that needs to be heard, and I want to be sensitive to that, but I also want to find a solution that is positive, even progressive, as well as remedial.
- Jessica Davis: [after reading a text message] Oh, shit!
- Principal Gary Bolan: I'm sorry?
- Jessica Davis: I mean, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Whatever.
- Principal Gary Bolan: If I suspend you, I have to suspend everybody in your group, not to mention Clay Jensen and Tyler Down, as well as the majority of the football team: Zach Dempsey, Justin Foley, Charlie Saint-George, Montgomery de la Cruz...
- Jessica Davis: Wouldn't that be a shame if Monty got suspended?
- Principal Gary Bolan: We have damage to our stadium and to our field. We had to cancel the homecoming dance. I have football players walking around with black eyes and bloody faces like they've been through the wars.
- Jessica Davis: Isn't that what football's all about?
- Principal Gary Bolan: I have the Dean of Students of Hillcrest calling, threatening personal injury lawsuits.
- Jessica Davis: Well, they started it.
- Principal Gary Bolan: Our students threw all the first punches.
- Jessica Davis: Yeah, but Hillcrest started it. You get that, right?
- Principal Gary Bolan: This was about Bryce Walker, was it not? The fact that he was on the field.
- Jessica Davis: Bryce Walker had nothing to do with it.
- Principal Gary Bolan: Yeah, well, you and I both know that's not true. Now, you listen to me, Jessica. You incited a riot and there are consequences. You're the student body president, for Christ's sake. You're supposed to be a role model.
- Principal Gary Bolan: That's what I was being.
- Clay Jensen: [while Clay gives Ani a tour of the school] This is the trophy case, and we actually have many more academic decathlon and robotics trophies, but they're kept in the math and science wing, which is in a different building to keep the main student body from being infected by something like actual knowledge. To your left is the classroom of the ironically named Mr. Champion, who stares at girls' breasts while he's talking to them. These are posters for the drama club. We actually have the most low-key drama club anywhere. They're totally not annoying people at all. The drawback being their plays are super boring, but really nice people. Library's out that way. It's a pretty typical library as high school libraries go, which means underfunded and thoroughly devoid of any book that could be remotely controversial. This is my locker, which I sometimes use to stick my head into and scream.
- Clay Jensen: [to Ani as he continues to give her a tour of the school] They call this the back quad, even though there's no front quad and back quad sounds like "backwad," which sounds either like a wedgie or a roll of fat that shows when your shirt rides up. Football and soccer field down there, baseball field out there. Clearly the nicest parts of the school, because athletes are our heroes and deserving of everything they want, including the ability to sexually assault girls and never suffer any sort of consequences, because why should they? Um, sorry. Cafeteria over there. I bring my lunch. That's not a commentary on the cafeteria food. That's just a nugget from my life.
- Ani Achola: Wow. I've been to, like, five high schools in three years, and that is by far the worst tour I've ever been given. The absolute worst.
- Montgomery de la Cruz: How is it when my dad beats the shit out of me, I'm the one who gets arrested?