Largely dense road movie with some comic relief provided by the excellent John Cleese (although he is really sending up his performance in Fawlty Towers). Seems to flip from over the top slapstick to slushy sentimentality at the drop of a hat, and the worst part of the film is that Martin and Hawn have to "find themselves", who they are, etc. See it at your peril.
Reviews
13 Reviews
The Birds
(1963)
Im-peck-able Hitchcock
26 August 1999
Incredibly scary late Hitchcock with many effective moments (especially the attack in the bedroom and at the children's party). Excellent performances from Taylor, Hedron and Tandy prevail, but the film is flawed by a weak plot (Hedren coming all the way from San Francisco) and the film lacks a proper ending. The murkyness surrounding the possible connection between the attacks and the lovebirds is very smart, and the film is a Hitchcock worth seeing.
Casino Royale
(1967)
A film without any semblance of style, story or sense
16 June 1999
What an atrocious film! This must be one of the biggest wastes of time and talent ever. How could respected actors such as David Niven and Peter Sellers lower themselves to this? The film is devoid of all humour and just bores the viewer. This film went through a plethora of scriptwriters and directors and it shows, with the plot being a stitched-together patchwork of half-baked ideas, and jokes someone somewhere thought were funny. A stellar cast list is completely wasted. Niven has a line in the film: "The enemy won't know which way to turn." Well, the audience certainly do - in the direction of the 'EXIT' signs. What a waste!
The Concorde... Airport '79
(1979)
Flat on its pointy nose
15 June 1999
This film is an absolute disgrace! I thoroughly enjoyed the original Airport, and I can't believe how the same people could produce this twaddle nine years on. First of all, the acting is bad. The original had actors who had done quality (non-disaster) films before, but this one uses actors who have done the disaster movie circuit already (Blakely, Kennedy, Wagner). Also, George Kennedy's character Patroni seems to get promoted very quickly. He is now the lead in the film, but his character isn't strong enough to carry it off: he has lost the charm and humour of Airport (1970), and the character is now just boring. Have I mentioned the plot? Is it at all believable that someone would send a missile after the Concorde?? NO!!! There are also too many loose ends; scenes that have no relevance whatsoever to the plot. The scene where the hot air balloon lands on the runway, the chase of the thief in Charles De Gaulle airport are two such scenes. Both would be interesting - if only they had something to do with the actual story. There also many unanswered questions: Why does Patroni open the window and fire a flare at the other plane? Why does Robert Wagner's character kill himself? (He must have another stupid and costly way of Why is there no enquiry after the missile almost blows up the Concorde? Why are the back projections so bad? (It looks as though a cartoon missile is following the Concorde; although it does work well when the plane lands in Paris) Why does Patroni think that he is in a flight simulator? (when he turns the Concorde over) Why does he get a hero's welcome in the cabin of the plane after having terrified the passengers? And why is the ending so poor, if it can be called an ending at all? Given their one-dimensional-ness, no-one seems to notice this. The blessing given to the young couple on the plane by the girl's coach is shmaltzy, the man who plays the saxophone is annoying, and the woman with the bladder problem is just plain silly. The scenes where Susan Blakely is lying on the roof of her conservatory, and the when she tells Wagner that she still loves him are quite awful. In conclusion, this film should have been the climax of the previous three Airport films: instead it is a diabolical, sub-moronic, complete and utter waste of time, money, energy, celluloid and "talent"!!!!!!! Remember when Patroni asks the French pilot if he has "ever landed on his belly?" This film certainly does the belly flop, and lands flat on its pointy nose...
A View to a Kill
(1985)
The worst Bond film ever made
11 June 1999
How could anyone sit through this awful film? Bond has become an old man with his pipe and slippers. Roger Moore should have bowed out gracefully after "Octopussy", instead of being party to this appalling mess. He seems to front a succession of stuntmen, and he sleeps with women young enough to be his children. Tanya Roberts was similarily dreadful in this film: other women are probably offended that women are depicted like her in this film. In some scenes, it looks as though she is out for a walk with her grandfather (Bond) as he's just too old. Christopher Walken should have had more sense than to get involved: his character is completely devoid of all interest. However, the worst scene of all is the opening sequence: Grandfather Moore sit on a snowmobile, while a backdrop plays behind him. Then he goes skiing with the Beach Boy's "California Girls". (Awful!). But what of the scene where the submarine-cum-iceberg opens up, revealing a Union Jack. The end of this sequence, where Bond tells his girlfriend that they have five days to kill is just plain silly. Patrick MacNee is excellent, but is seen only to briefly. The film would have been more watchable if he remained in the film for longer. Finally, the scene with the firetruck chase is disgraceful. Avoid this film at all costs.
Airport
(1970)
A great starter to a great genre
26 May 1999
The 1970s was essentially the decade of the disaster movie. It seems fitting that since this one was released in 1970, that it should be the first. And what a start it is. This is just such a brilliant film: the acting is well above average. Look out for class crooner Dean Martin as the pilot of the aircraft, and also for the very excellent Helen Hayes as the sweet little old lady who works the system. I think the balance between what is happening on the ground and what is happening in the air is just right. I think the thread that holds the plot together is the fact that everyone has a stake up in the ill-fated plane; relatives onboard, etc. This helps to make it more realistic. The scene where the bomb goes off is excellent, as are the aircraft recovery scenes on the ground with the brilliant George Kennedy. While the film's relationships are corny and predictable (Martin with Bisset, and Lancaster with Seberg), it would be unfair to write off the whole film. This is one to watch; and it could have been even better if Dino was to have sung in the film...
The Towering Inferno
(1974)
Where great acting meets great action
17 May 1999
For my money, Towering Inferno is the world's greatest disaster movie. The acting is brilliant: McQueen is superb as the gritty fire chief, and Newman contrasts effectively as the brave playboy. The other stars are completely in place: Chamberlain as the sterotyped baddie, Blakely as the neurotic wife. Admittedly, these are cliched roles, but it is largely from this film that such characters are copied. The storyline is (almost) convincing, and the pace is brisk but not too fast to follow. Look out for Fred Astaire "tap" dancing on the fire...
The Mark of Zorro
(1974 TV Movie)
Entertainment with a capital "E"
17 May 1999
I saw this film on TV recently. The Daily Mail had listed it as one to miss, but I'm glad I taped it. I had previously seen the new version with Anthony Hopkins, and this one compares quite favourably with it. Gilbert Roland is fantastic playing both the role of Don Diego, where he puts on an air of bored arrogance. This contrasts brilliantly with his role of Zorro when he dresses up with the mask. The action is more than first rate: it is sublime. It doesn't rely on special effects, but on acting and style. Probably the best TV movie I have ever seen...
Big Fry vs. Lollipop Man?
15 May 1999
OHMSS is probably the least liked Bond film (after A View to a Kill). But if we look at the film, it is clear that there is much entertainment to be had from it. For once, the action is quite heartstopping: we are treated to the fight on the beach at the start, the brilliant skiing scenes, and Bond's assualt on Blofeld's mountain retreat. The film doesn't rely on gadgetry, like many of the other Bond films: instead it looks to acting. For many, George Lazenby is seen as appalling in this film. I disagree with this comment; he is as convincing at the fight sequences as he is at the love scenes, and is more than a match for Connery's Bond. Diana Rigg is gorgeous and witty as the Contessa, and what of Blofeld's 'angels of death'? For me, Telly Savalas is the ultimate Blofeld. He is much more active and sophisticated than Donald Pleasance in You Only Live Twice. In fact, Savalas plays a convincing adversary to Lazenby's Bond. The script is inventive, and John Barry's score is superb. What can I say about the theme song...
Escape to Athena
(1979)
Why does everyone hate this film?
14 May 1999
No one likes this film. Why not? It is a remarkably good film, with an excellent cast. Telly Savalas seems to be remarkably at home in this film; he is very natural. I also think that it is good to see David Niven in a different setting to his usual role as the English gentlemen. However, Roger Moore's German accent is appalling. The character of Charlie is also well imagined, and the motorcycling stunts are first class. There are some great one-liners: "I think your defection to the Allies must be taken as something of a mixed message." And did I mention the soundtrack from Heatwave (at the end of the film) ...
The Wrong Man
(1956)
Reasonable Hitchcock
14 May 1999
This is an enjoyable film: Henry Fonda is at his very best when he is in the role of the innocent man who is wrongly accused of robbery. The director uses the role of fate to show how difficult his predicament is. However, for a Hitchcock, it is only reasonable: it is by no means the best known. It doesn't compare with the light humour of North By Northwest, or with the cynical humour of Rear Window. It will do, though...
The Anderson Tapes
(1971)
Better than you'd think
6 May 1999
This film is remarkably good. Connery is (for once) in a convincing role, and Martin Balsam is excellent as the gay antiques dealer. The storyline is credible, and I think the 'flashback' scenes as the robbery occurs are very good. There are the usual stereotyped figures (the bickering old grannies, the ten year old radio ham), but the film is well worth watching. It is also Christopher Walken's first film appearance...
The Mask of Zorro
(1998)
The best film in forty years
23 April 1999
This is an excellent film. It is one of the few modern films that cuts back on the special effects and relies more on acting. Anthony Hopkins is at this very best in the film: he is very convincing as Zorro (although I think the make-up was overdone at the beginning of the film) and the film has a refreshingly inventive script. Antonio Bandaras is even better than in Evita, and I thought the dialogue exchanges between Hopkins and he were quite first rate. I have only given two films 10/10 on the voting section. The other was North by Northwest...
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