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El Ambre
Reviews
Convict 762 (1997)
Unwatchable
Convict 762 is a lesson in how not to make a sci-fi film. Completely and utterly unwatchable. How on earth did a film like this get made? The performances were overwrought and the special effects were so terrible I expected to see the fishing line holding up the spaceships. Please Hollywood don't make anymore pieces of drivel like this I beg you.
Zombie vs. Ninja (1989)
Time Warp
Zombie vs Ninja is such a powerful piece of cinema that it somehow created a time warp around my living room and made it seem as if the movie took 4 hours to watch. The acting, editing, garbage bag ninja costumes were all terrible. The movie stunk to high heaven, and caused me to regrettably lose an hour and a half of my life. I'll never regain that time back and I am worse off as a human being for viewing the movie.