pazuzu-2 Reviews

The Nude Bomb (1980)

It came along at the right time for me to enjoy it

[7/10 · 16 July 2008]

It was the early 80's and we just got HBO and Cinemax. This was one of the movies that were legion on both channels.

I had seen Get Smart off and on in reruns so I was only passively familiar with it. So the exclusion of 99 and most of the rest of the gang didn't really bother me. I never knew that 99 and Max eventually married until I watched the show again later on so that was not a factor either.

I liked the movie and got familiar with it because it was on all the time. At the time, I enjoyed the somewhat racier humor and slapstick.

Then, for a while it all but disappeared from view only to be released on VHS and Laserdisc around the time the Naked Gun movies were popular. So I sought out a copy.

Looking at it now after being more familiar with the original Get Smart I could see how the fans of the show were disappointed. But I still like it as a stand alone parody of a James Bond movie.

It has a lot going for it in that regard, the opening sequence, the music (another good job by Lalo Shifrin) and scenes are a good mocking of a James Bond movie.

A lot of the humor fits right in with the original Get Smart, as well. The silliness of a Nude Bomb, secret devices that actually draw attention to themselves (shoe phone, desk car)and the wacky clone happy finale.

As a stand alone parody of James Bond movies, it works, as a continuation of Get Smart, it doesn't. But I saw it at first as a stand alone movie (even though I knew about the show it came from) and I can keep it separate from the show.

And the best thing is they both have Don Adams.

They Live (1988)

Fun but paranoid liberal fantasy about the Reagan years

[7/10 · 1 June 2006]

I dug this film when I first saw it. I saw it again last night and still dug it but found myself laughing at what John Carpenter obviously thought was deep social comment on the Reagan years.

I love John Carpenter, when he's at his best ("THE THING") nobody can beat him. But John, just like anyone can cross the line into the sanctimonious thinly disguised statement of policy according to the director.

That's fine if the statement is better thought out and more complex then the underlying one of "They Live".

Still, in this movie, even though that line is indeed crossed, it still has enough cheesy, campy Sci-fi appeal to halfway overlook the shallow socio-political world view.

The movie was made in 1988, in the midst of a robust economic expansion. Yet, it chooses to portray an America that is on the skids for all but a few.

And those few are either Repub... I mean Aliens exploiting the planet and the masses and Reagan Democr.... er I mean the human turncoats that are in league with them to enrich themselves.

The Aliens can only be exposed with special glasses (along with all the subliminal propaganda that is printed in magazines, billboards, TV and even on currency). I don't know how those glasses can reorder the scan lines of a cathode ray tube in order to show hidden things on the TV but I guess I shouldn't try to figure that one out. The exposed aliens look like they are missing the skin on their faces or maybe they are wearing masked with some sort of holographic generator to generate facial features. Okay, I promise to stop trying to figure this out.

Okay, you can see the Aliens with the glasses but how do you identify the human turncoats? Well, they are the characters that have more than one nickel to rub together mostly. Because, in Carpenter's world, no one comes by wealth honestly (except for movie directors, perhaps).

SPOILER: For instance, how many were really surprised that Holly Thomson was a turncoat? All you have to do is look at her nice apartment and you could've written that surprise yourself.

Still, all that is easily put aside so you can enjoy the lines and the moments.

Lines like "I'm here to kick ass and chew bubblegum and I'm all out of bubblegum" and "Life's a bitch and she's back in heat" and moments like the ultimately hilarious 5+ minute long fist fight between Roddy Piper and Keith David's characters.

A 5 minute rumble over Roddy wanting Keith to put on the glasses so he too can see the Aliens and messages.

I don't care how macho bull#%$* you are, most would just put on the glasses instead of having a couple broken ribs BUT NOOOOOOOO......

Not that it slowed them down any. I mean, Roddy Piper was already tossed out a plate glass window from a couple stories before they fought and seemed only momentarily encumbered.

Then, it took only a few scenes after this knock down drag out for both of them to look completely recovered.

Too bad universal health-care wasn't on the radar in 1988, John could've had them both had to go to the hospital after the fight and encounter a whole new group of aliens bent on keeping prescription drugs and medical care high. But that may be another story.

Finally, what really bears mentioning about "They Live" is how it must've inspired "The Matrix" to a certain extent.

Aliens coming to Earth and hide themselves by altering our perception of reality.

Main characters break out of that alternate reality and try to take down the aliens through lots of ammo and insurrection "Whoa..!"

Ultimataly, "They Live" is more enjoyable because it's only pretentious in it's politics. "The Matrix" is pretentious across the board (with CGI, I guess they can afford to be).

It also lacks John Carpenter's sense of fun (not to mention his scoring. John is the king of making minimalist, repetitious background music for his movies that somehow work)

And any time Rowdy Roddy Piper is not in his kilt, it's a plus (hey, he turned in a decent performance).

Moral Orel (2005–2009)

If Hitler made comedy shows about the Jewish...

[1/10 · 22 May 2006]

It would probably be no different then Moral Orel. All you would have to do is change the designation of the religion being bashed in an unfunny, bigoted and mean spirited fashion (all the while accusing bashed religion of being bigoted and mean spirited).

It's that hypocrisy that's cast over every minute of Moral Orel. Here we have 10-11 minutes of nothing but thuggish slurs against Chistians and they got the balls to make the Christians out to be the intolerant, xenophobic and reactionary half-wits.

Moral Orel is still an interesting watch (as long as it comes between superior shows on Adult Swim) because it is a satire. However, It is more a satire on the people that make it rather then the people it is depicting.

If you ever want a representation of how some arrogant, elitist "Blue Staters" views flyover country and how bigoted some are against those who sets foot in a church, look no farther than Moral Orel.

The people who make this think it's edgy. Yeah, right! Give me a break! Dopey, borderline racist, clueless, out of touch, out of the times Christians are the only Christians that modern Hollywood depicts and recognizes. All the MO team is doing is making a bad Davey and Golieth parody out of it but there is no shortage of the meat of what they are doing (quite badly).

Edgy and brave suggests consequences beyond the occasional cold feet of Adult Swim Standards and Practices. It suggests social and in some cases financial and physical risk.

So if Dino wants REALLY be edgy and brave bashing religion let him turn his sights on militant Islam.

But this will not happen since that would actually be taking a risk in the politically correct circles that Dino is presumably a part of. The pats on the back he probably gets for ridiculing Christians by similar thinking "enlightened" people will turn to accusations of "insensitivity" for saying anything bad about Islam.

Also, militant Islam's reaction to slurs against them are... well... militant. So, let's not kid ourselves, some iconoclasts are only safe iconoclasts, going down well worn roads of supposed "envelope pushing" while the envelope has already been broken for some time.

There is a way to do biting religious satire without crossing the line into bashing and bigotry. But the whole point of MO is ignoring the line. In the hands of more empathetic and talented people that might work (i.e. Trey Parker and Matt Stone).

But as it is, MO is just a look into the mind(or minds, who knows if just is exclusively Dino Stamatopoulos's baby) of insufferably arrogant, iconoclastic arrested adolescence.

The type that feels entitled not only to jab at deeply held beliefs of a group of largely decent people but to totally stomp on them while slurring those people.

And they (the people slurred against) are supposed to grin and bear it because it is all in good fun, after all. They must learn to be tolerant and understanding of those that are practicing the opposite towards them.

They don't have to watch it, after all. All they have to do is tolerate others watching a stilted, moronic, stereotypical, negative portrayal of them. All done for and by people that seem to have contempt, hatrid and ignorance for who they are.

So there you have it, "Moral Orel" a comedy satire in the great tradition of "Amos and Andy"

Herbie Fully Loaded (2005)

Good enough for kids and for the die hards to groove on Herbie

[8/10 · 19 June 2005]

I loved Herbie ever since I was a kid but besides the first 2 flicks, Disney has never seemed to lavish much writing and directing prowess on my beloved VW.

Still, seeing Herbie on the big screen is enough to get me excited and so I went to a sneak preview of Herbie today with other Herbie lovers and kids.

I loved the movie in spite of itself. It wasn't terrible, but it was nothing special. It fails at freshening up the concept as "Parent Trap" and "Freaky Friday's" remake has (both starring Lindsey Lohan).

Also, when you are dealing is a fantasy concept like a car with a heart and personality, you want to have a more realistic reaction for characters around that car.

And yet, this hyper animated version of Herbie (he can emote with his headlights and bumpers now, you know) seems to go pretty unnoticed by most (especially the characters closest to him). Sometimes a bit character would notice that Herbie would blink with headlights but it takes an awfully long time for the main characters to catch on.

Of course, Lohan's character suspects something (calling it "The mystery of Herbie")but she must've not thought much of that mystery if she could be swayed by a fancy car to race for pinks.

It's a result of trying to shoehorn the characters to fit the target plot points that are mapped out in the story instead of what they would probably do more naturally.

The plot dictates that about 1/2 through the movie Lohan's character should forsake Herbie somehow (before ultimately Herbie and Lohan coming back together for the biggest race and test of their lives). Her doing it after all she's seen with Herbie is not believable.

So the fantasy is not anchored by realism in the character's reactions.

As it stands now, Herbie:Fully Loaded is a pleasant enough film. It has nothing that will get in the way of kids and Herbie fans loving it. But it likes the finesse' that would make it a movie of value to anyone beyond that.

The characters never advance beyond being tools of the plot and the acting reflects that.

Phase IV (1974)

Ambitious and partially successfull

[23 April 2004]

One has to give credit to this Science Fiction movie for having actual Science Fiction concepts instead of space battles(nothing against space battles, properly done I love them).

Basically this film is about what happens when ants gain a collective intelligence and declare war on man.

The talkiness (which, at least for me wasn't fatally boring) is offset by incredible micro-photography of real ants and a good overall sense of creepiness of the encroaching insects.

Saul Bass will be forever known as the one who did innovative title sequences for films (especially Hitchcock films)and his claims to have actually directed the shower sequence in Psycho.

Here, the directing and the titles are pretty straight forward and there is some good cinematography. The stand out photography are the ant sequences, of course. I'd be interested to know how they got the ants to do things needed for the story.

Bubble Boy (2001)

The title is the funniest thing about this movie

[12 August 2003]

What happens when you mix Tim Burton with the Farely Bros with a heaping helping of sheer shrieking insanely bigoted contempt for devoutly religious people?

You get Bubble Boy. If you are on the ball (no pun intended) and pay attention to how they set up the the character of the mother (Republican and religious which in the world of Hollywood also makes her racist, sexually repressed, mean, judgmental, over protective and just a general pain in the arse) you will start to suspect there will be a "surprise" ending concerning bubble boy. And due to the myopic, smug world view radiating off the filmmakers you will find you were right on the money. It took me 15 minutes into the movie in order to figure out that there would be a "surprise" ending. Maybe you can figure it out sooner, I'm sometimes slow on the uptake.

Now, all the above wouldn't matter if the movie was funny, but it's not. Besides a few and far between chuckles this movie left me stone faced.

Don't get me wrong: I'm sure that having a dying cow being run over by a truck and splattered in half in front of a well meaning Hindu (which holds Cows sacred) and then run over again and again by other vehicles could be funny (even to people that aren't anti religious bigots). However, it would have to be done by a film maker who was keenly aware of the taboo he was crossing instead of being gleefully obsessed with sticking it to the devout.

It all but overshadows the sweetness and inclusiveness of the main character (Jimmy in the bubble). But that's how messed up this movie is.

Jimmy is a sweet soul, seeing the best in everybody in the middle of a movie made by people who smugly disparage those in the film that think differently then they do and think it's funny.

Kids (1995)

Depraved does not = realistic

[6 July 2003]

I think I'm going to erupt into a fit if I ever hear "This movie is so realistic"

Let's get one thing straight. A movie crowded with repugnant examples of humanity shall not stand as a testament to realism.

Depraved is simply what the film makers wanted to concentrate on because they knew it would turn heads. And it's a selective reality that ignores anything that doesn't reinforce it.

This film is not important, is not a masterpiece and is not brave. It is a simple exercise in Jerry Springer film making where we get to see, instead of hear all the "gory details".

It was made for vicarious thrills with a somber resolution to excuse you for having those thrills.

It does work on a Jerry Springer level, but there is no need to heap praise on that acomplishment.

Beyond the Darkness (1979)

Sickest movie ever....

[19 February 2002]

It takes a lot to get under my skin and this movie did it.

When this guy's girlfriend dies, we watch as he preserves her. We watch as he slices her open and removes her organs and drops them into a metal bucket. we see her being embalmed, we see the whole deal.

But that was nothing compared to the murder of a female drifter. Before he kills her he tears off her fingernails one by one for good measure.

After she's dead, both him and his housekeeper (she is just as deranged as him) makes an acid bath. The housekeeper strips the girl and take a hatchet and dismembers her and drops the severed legs, arms, etc into the acid bath. Toward the end of the segment the head resurfaces from the acid bath, half eaten away.

But still, it's not over. The housekeeper is rounding up the leftover flesh scraps and blood on the floor with a(I think) dust pan and makes a stew out of it.

We get a nice close up of the housekeeper sloppily eating away at the stew, causing the man (and us) to retch.

And that's not even half the movie!!

This movie is good as an endurance test, can you take it?

Can't Stop the Music (1980)

The duality of 1970's Village People's popularity collides

[30 December 2001]

The Village people started as a band who was for the Gay community. Then, something else happened. Teenagers started to like them, but on a totally different level of the disco music and costume theatrics.

When it came time to make a movie, which audience do you try to satisfy?

Well, I guess Alan Carr thought you could satisfy them both.

The result is one of the most incredibly bizarre, unintentionally funny musicals ever made. One that tried to balance Family friendly and Gay friendly to help VP's duel followings to come and enjoy.

But even my naive, young self who saw this movie when it first came out could sense that... something was amiss in the village :)

I mean, the YMCA sequence has quick, almost subliminal cuts of a bunch of guys in the shower, one slapping a towel on the others butt (swear to God!) in between loving, slow motion shots of buff oiled athletic guys and an all male sychronized swimming team scene.

Hmmm....

That was a bit sledgehammer, even for me back then.

Then, I watched it more recently and found a gay movie that was in denial

You have a movie that never says the "G" word but has an incredibly effeminate man with TIGHT gold shorts come in and Juggle "Flaming" fire batons.

The Indian,Felipe Rose, has that nice, smooth look and wears cut off jeans and a headress and when he prances around, makes noise like a wind chime tinkling.

The Leather man, Glenn Hughes (rest in peace)sounds pretty effeminate.

The Construction worker, David Hodo, has a musical number where he tries to escape from a bunch of adoring women...

Then there is Lulu, who seems to be female... mostly, but she reminds me of a drag queen.

Which begs a question? How come almost all the Homo imagery here is for males. How come the lesbians get left out?

And how come a lot of this movie is "looped". Even a lot of stage shot stuff seems to have been redubbed in post production. It made me think I was watching a forign movie sometimes.

Ahhh well, you'll have a lot of fun with this. You'll be in disbelief that the thinly disguised homoerotic undertones went over the heads of the powers that be. Perhaps they were too busy watching Valerie Perrine "stick out".

Bad movie fans will be in their glory too. It's not everyday that a big budget movie like this is so hilariously and ineptly executed.

And hang on to your hats boys and girls, that great video company Anchor Bay has bought the rights to this movie and it will be on DVD in April 2002. Hopefully it will be a special edition, with a widescreen transfer and 5.1 remix and I'll be one of the first to get it.

I still like the Village People and love this campy, bizarre, collosal misfire of a movie.

Cornbread, Earl and Me (1975)

Promising film hampered it's by music

[5 March 2001]

This is a rather well done film with great performances. Where it drops the ball is on the overdramatic music that sledgehammers the emotional tone of the more dramatic scenes.

It resists the temptation of villianizing all of the antagonists, especially the judge (which no doubt would've been portrayed as racist and corrupt in a similar film made today).

Bernie Casey (who I'll always think of as U.N Jefferson in Revenge Of The Nerds) is terrific and it's too bad I don't see him in too many films today.

Great 70's feel and the first appearance of Larry Fishburn makes this a film to check out.

Alice, Sweet Alice (1976)

Correcting my first comment

[8/10 · 22 January 2001]

When I said "I hope David directs a film again sometime soon". I really meant I hope Alfred(Alfred Sole) directs another film sometime soon.

For those of you who might want to look at this film, get the DVD. The Anchor Bay VHS is good but is missing a scene (a not too important scene, but it is missing) as well as a few seconds of audio.

The Roan Group Laserdisc is also missing the same scene but all the audio is there.

The Anchor Bay DVD I got (could be a second pressing) has the missing scene restored and all the audio (plus the commentary of the Roan group laserdisc).

Alice, Sweet Alice (1976)

A sterling example of the genre

[8/10 · 17 January 2001]

At a theater I lived near in 1978, I saw the movie poster for "Alice, Sweet Alice". I had already caught a commercial or two for it on TV. The commercial made it look creepy and the poster made it look even creepier.

I wanted to see it, but it was rated R and I was much too young for it.

I finally saw it on cable in the eighties and I definataly was impressed. It was just about as creepy and unsettling as I imagined it was. The music, the mask, Alice, picture of a charred Brooke Shields all put together with a Hitchcockian flair.

It's become one of my favorites. Hope David directs sometime soon again

Don't Look Now (1973)

Nightmarish and Beautiful

[17 January 2001]

1973 was a terrific year for horror films. You had "The Exorcist" which was brilliant for mixing shock scenes with great plot and characters.

Then there is the forgotten(except by a lucky few) "Don't Look Now". A methodical, surrealistic film with that builds up to a climax that will haunt you.

Everybody comments on the sex scene in this movie and with good reason. Take a look at any of those NC-17 rated "films" on Cinemax and almost any sex scene you will see will have a prefuntory, mechanical, emotionless approach.

The sex scene in this movie is warm and rich and looks like it happened with a couple that is in love.

But the real highlights in this film are the dreamlike happenings that happen throughout that do not get explained until the end (well, not completely explained).

Besides where it takes place, the film itself has a foreign feel and for that reason it didn't quite connect with American Audiences in the way "The Exorcist" did.

But for film lovers that gave it a chance, it no doubt left a real impression on them.

Watch out for the figure in the rain coat!

This Is Spinal Tap (1984)

This movie goes to 11

[12 September 2000]

What does it say about Rock and Roll when a group of comics and actors can get together and make a servicable but mediocre rock band that fools more than a few people?

I dunno, I just know that "This Is Spinal Tap" is very funny because of that "It's as if they are a real band" feeling.

This film perfectly captures the pampered pomposity that many rock stars have. The conviction that they are creating something"important" beyond agreeable entertainment. It also captures the proud sexism in the songs and the desperation in hanging on to the "success lightning" that was captured in their bottle for a time.

The movie captures this through on target comedy.

I love Rock and Roll, but have no illusions, Rock and Roll at it's purest is not "Important" or "relevant". It is adolescently driven, good time boogie music.

Behind the comedy of this movie is that truth.

Bob Roberts (1992)

Prophetic

[16 August 2000]

The most interesting thing about seeing Bob Roberts is that I keep missing the white hair on Bob.

It is interesting that a film was made at the beginning of the Clinton years would predict a lot of the bambooziling theatrics, prevarication and character assasination engaged by his regime.

Bob had a guitar, Bill had a Saxaphone and the similarities begin thier.

This is an excellent film for helping anyone to vote with thier head, not thier heart. This film saved me from voting for Clinton again!

Ghost Story (1981)

Fairly good...

[26 May 2000]

Atmospheric horror film that doesn't excel, but is worth a view none the less.

This movie must live down a very early scene where a fully frontal nude Craig Wasson plunges out of a high rise window to his death. The scene has a real phony look to it and conjers up images of just how fun it was for Craig to shoot it in front of a blue screen.

The four great and distinguished older actors do a good job in elevating the movie. Alice Krige is great as the tormenting and tormented lady ghost.

The musical score is INCREDIBLE, one of the best I've heard for this type of film.

Makeup artist Dick Smith comes through again with the many visions of the rotted ghost.

A good horror film, give it a shot if you haven't already.

Airport 1975 (1974)

This is Columbia 409...

[7/10 · 1 April 2000]

Ahhh, this is delightfully undiluted Hollywood dreck of the most charming and enjoyable kind. Everything.. the dialog, the music, the look has that soap opera look.

It's been said that this project started out as a TV movie but got bumped up to a feature film along the way. The script still sounds like a TV movie and the special effects are very uneven. The large scale airplane shots are great and very cinematic. Some cockpit scenes use badly matched rear projection while others cockpit rear projection scenes look fantastic.

Cliques' abound everywhere, as in the portrayal of Gloria Swanson by... Gloria Swanson. Most of her lines are so delightfully stereotypical it makes Ginger from "Gilligan's Island" look complex. "Of course, I never did anything I was expected to do..."

Then there is Linda Blair who seems to be on a mission with her role as a hopeful kidney transplant patient. That mission is to tell the world "You see, I'm not I'm not a Demon monster, like I played in The Exorcist. I *really am* nice." At the time, the "Hollywood Press" was paranoid with the effect making "The Exorcist" had on Linda Blair.

So, in response to this, Linda plays the Kidney patient with a nose scruntching, smiling sweetness that makes you think she is possessed once again... by a Von Trapp kid.

Still, I thought Linda Blair would end up launching pea soup at Sister Helen Ready as she sang that... song.

Charlton Heston is his ultra macho self and whenever he's in a movie, I'm usually loving it. This is no exception.

I was a kid when this came out and there was this glamourous, sleek mystique to airplanes and airports for me. Flying was a much more exclusive and expensive thing back then, before deregulation. Also, seeing these giant pieces of metal leave the ground was almost like magic and yes, it would be a thrill to be in it but... what if something went wrong?

So, it was with these feelings that I went to see this movie with in early 1976. I really was wanting to see "JAWS" and it was just a happy accident that "JAWS" was double featured with this movie. Seeing one movie in a theater was a special deal for me. Seeing two was practically an event.

I came out of the theater thrilled with both movies, thinking they were cut from the same cloth. Of course, as we come to now, "JAWS" is still an indisputable classic and one of the best movies of it's type ever.

"Airport 1975"... well... provided 90% of the inspiration for one of the best comedies ever: "Airplane!". "Airport 1975" itself is a campy, fun, escapist thriller/adventure. It's cinematic junk food that tastes terrific. It's nostalga to me doesn't hurt it a bit either.

"Airport 1975" has a kinship with "Earthquake", in that both had Charlton Heston and George Kennedy. Both provided Universal television shows (The Incredible Hulk, Battlestar Galactica, etc.)with opportunities to build shows around the stock footage they could use from both films (The Hulk gets stuck on an airplane that is Columibia 409, A simulation of a cylon attack uses Earthquake's scenes of destruction, The Hulk gets stuck in an Earthquake's earthquake too).

Both became "events" when they came to network TV, adding (or even filming) additional scenes to make a full evening (or even a 2 evening) television event.

Both had those 1 sheet posters with several little "mug shots" of all the stars in the movie.

Both are sometimes laughable in terms of characters and story but are remarkably lovable none the less.

The Food of the Gods (1976)

Turkey of the Gods

[22 February 2000]

I think Richard can relax. It looks to me that they weren't actually shooting the rats but spraying red ink on them strong enough to stun them backward (not exactly nice, but not fatal either). I may be be wrong, but I'm sure even in the 70's you got into big time trouble if you abused animals for film.

This movie scarred me as a kid and is a camp favorite now. I haven't seen it in a while but I think I'll rent it soon.

The rat suits worn by actors and created by then beginner Rick Baker were pretty cool for back then.

The Cheerleaders (1973)

A sexploitation classic

[6 February 2000]

"The Cheerleaders" is a prime example of a great sexploitation film.

It has fun, does not take itself seriously and never goes too long without the promised "action".

Despite the frequent sex, the movie is overall light and innocent. A lot of the comedy arises from the sex scenes which is sort of unique. Usually in these films the sex scenes are played straight and/or romantic and the sthick is in the rest of the film. Here, sex is part of the sthick and because of that it mixes into the movie a whole lot better.

It's also unusual to have female nudity played for laughs. The rule of thumb in these movies is that male nudity is funny (like in Porkys or Private Resort)and female nudity is sexy. In this movie, female nudity is played for laughs at least a couple times.

Slapstick, sexual slapstick, goofy premise, total reality disconnect, pre PC freedom, impossibly short cheerleader skirts, this movie has it all.

What it also has is a leading lady who's cute with a capital CUTE. Willowy Stephanie Fondue plays Jeannie, a girl who is desperate to lose her virginity but whenever she tries, something goes wrong. That's where the suspension of disbelief begins and you'll have to keep it all through the film. Especially when the cheerleaders come up with thier grand plan of helping thier team win by tiring out the opposing team in a... er... special way.

This is a classic for the Joe Bob Briggs set, of which I am a part(Yes, I love the real classics, I love the high minded films but I love these type of movies too... so shoot me).

It's also full of ephemeral details like see through water beds, shag walls and pictures of teen stars in the lockers I can't recognize. It's a trip!

The girls playing the cheerleaders did not have Oscars looming over thier heads but they were appealing and often showed decent comic timing.

You are most likely to find this film on video edited to an R(the earliest video release was not edited. I've seen both). The original version, while not pornographic, would no doubt get an NC-17 today. I don't know if it was originally released as an X rating, unrated or if it did indeed squeak by with an "R" rating because of the MPAA's looser latitude on sex in films back then.

So, for those of you that liked "American Pie" and all those other recent so called sexploitation movies, rent this movie and see how much more fun these type of movies were when they were less self conscious to getting a particular MPAA rating or to treading (but not crossing) "the line" and much more "Hey! This is going to be wild! Let's have fun with this!".

Deep Rising (1998)

A Pleasant Surprise

[27 January 2000]

I rented this movie because there was nothing else on the DVD shelf I could've possibly liked and it was going to be a snowy cold night tonight. I also thought this flick would have a good Dolby Digital soundtrack and I was in the mood for sound.

I was under the impression that this was a movie that was a rip off of "Alien", "Titanic", "Die Hard" and more. Well, my impression turned out to be right but I had no idea I'd like it so much.

The Characters are fun, it doesn't take itself seriously and delivers the thrills. One thrill, rips off "Annaconda" by producing a partially digested victim, but it works. Especially since it tops the original scene by REALLY making the victim look digested (and still kicking to boot).

Yes, the film is gory. One scene in particular had so many snacked on mutilated bodies on the floor that you could here the juicy sound effects as the characters are forced to walk on the remains(EEEEWWWWW!).

The humor works well throughout and I found myself laughing out loud at least a few times. One scene, in particular, works very well for a black humor laden laugh.

When the material is as familiar and time worn as this, most of the burden falls on the cast to make the movie fresh and likable. Treat Williams, Kevin O'Conner and Famke Janssen succeed in doing just that. Treat Williams has always been under rated, Kevin O'Conner has got a great Steve Buscemi style future ahead of him and Famke Janssen has great comic timing and is more than just a pretty face.

Yeah, you'll find bits and pieces of many other films you've seen in "Deep Rising" but it's still an entertaining melting pot.

Tommy (1975)

What movie did you all see?

[23 January 2000]

Wow! I find it hard to understand the mainly negative comments about "Tommy". I think of "Tommy" as a unique high energy rock musical. It's innovative in many ways and it succeeds more often than it fails.

Note to people complaining about Oliver Reed's singing:

It was possible back then to smooth over bad singing if that's what they wanted. I tend to think Oliver's off key singing is an artistic choice rather than a mistake. The "I wish I knee-eee-eeew..." line always gets a chuckle from me.

This movie has great moments like Tina Turner's Acid Queen sequence and Elton John's Pinball Wizard sequence. Oh! And how about that Eric Claptin "Eyesight To The Blind" sequence. The dark humor of the Cousin and Uncle sequence, wonderful! Jack Nicholson sings! He's not bad!

The movie is full of great imagery and the story of Tommy is well told through the music. The parable style of it all frees it from reality so you can have a church based on Marilyn Monroe and a guy who's main claim to fame is playing pinball well become a messiah.

Have another look at it and see what you think

Mike

Face/Off (1997)

The best "summer movie" of 97

[3 January 2000]

Face/Off does a great job at utilizing the possibilities of thier premise.

If this premise were in lesser hands it would simply have been a race against time movie. They would've had the bad guy(looking like the good guy)hiding the danger (the bomb he installed)he created. Then the good guy (looking like the bad guy)would've been faced with having to defuse the danger while being thought to be the bad guy.

Fortunataly, John Woo and company decide to go further with the concept. The villian sees the value in dismantling his own bomb and the power he could really have. The good guy hangs out with the buddies of the villian and develops empathy for them. The villian enjoys the family life of the good guy he's imitating.

Of course, there are some remarkable action sequences that work well (although the final one on the boat is a little overkill). John Woo has a balletic, rythmic style and visual style for these scenes and they are terrific.

John Travolta and Nick Cage have fun with thier duel roles and we have fun watching them.

Great cinematography, especially in the funeral scenes. The cinematography is augmented by great use of sound and music.

The Dolby Digital 5.1 soundtrack is put to rip roaring use, it takes your breath away.

The common objection to this movie is lack of realism and they do have a point. This movie, however, makes it easy and fun to suspend disbelief. Realism is at a premium in most action movies anyway. Realism is not needed to make a movie great.

This is a great movie

Toy Story 2 (1999)

Sweet, funny and poignant

[23 December 1999]

Toy Story 2 gives the main character, Woody, a decision to make, which alone sets it apart from most other films which would just place him in some sort of danger.

It also has one of the most heartbreaking scenes, I've seen in a film in a long time(minor spoiler coming).

Perhaps, it was so heartbreaking because all the toys in Toy Story 2 have the personalities of our favorite pets. They are innocent, naive, trusting and unconditionally loving to those that they belong to. They are always there when you need them, they always think the best about you and they are unwaveringly loyal.

It might have been that realization that sent much of the audience, including me, into tears during the musical flashback ( to Sarah McLaughlin's "When She Loved Me") of Jessie's (Woody's long lost red yarn hair doll companion) abandonment by her owner who got too old for her.

Even when Jessie was left under the bed and forgotten as her owner discovered nail polish and boys to when she was finally taken from under the bed and given a final car ride to be dropped off at Good Will, she never lost faith in her. Right to the time she was left in a good will box, she believed her owner would be with her again. That trust and unconditional love of Jessie made the final moment so devastating that I fight back tears just recalling it. It was an incredibly powerful moment that I am still in awe of...

I'm also in awe of how the makers of Toy Story 2 could have weaved in this sequence in a way that doesn't collapse the good nature of the film but they did.

The movie also takes aim at collectors...

At least the type of collectors that care about nothing but the money, who are obsessed with things being MIB (mint in box) and totally overlook the emotional value in the toys they are after.

Then, of course, there's the wonderful music, humor and animation in this movie. There are some terrific in jokes and great laughs period.

This movie is a home run in all respects, go see it soon

Deep Blue Sea (1999)

Above average, but not by much

[14 December 1999]

The first thing a movie like this should deliver is shocks and this film does that just fine. One character's attack in particular is a masterpiece of misdirection and uses what we've come to expect in films against us.

Out of all the characters, the cook, played by L.L. Cool J was the one I cared about the most. The rest were just waiting in line to go into the Jaws of the shark.

Special effects were uneven and sometimes the shark looked incredibly real and other times it looked incredibly phony.

But the most surprisingly bad effect in the movie is when a character had his arm bitten off by the shark. It was so annoyingly obvious that the actor's real arm was taped to his chest undernieth an oversized shirt and prosthetic arm stump set up that it looked like he was carrying a big lump on the side all through the sequence.

Effects like these were done much better before (like in 1982's Cat People) because the camera angles were much better chosen. But it seems Renny Harlin shot it any way he wanted and it looks comical. It was a prime candidate for CGI doctoring but I guess the computer graphics people were too busy delivering shark attack scenes.

Overall, it was pretty good, but it doesn't beat "JAWS" (nothing ever will)

Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things (1972)

The architypical Saturday afternoon horror movie

[14 November 1999]

This is a great horror movie that is not too intense but spooky. It has a real sense of humor (and surprisingly snappy dialog)and has some wonderfully atmospheric scenes of zombies coming out of the ground.

This movie was tailor made for Saturday afternoon TV before it was surrendered to infomercials and is great for preteen and early teen guys that got Famous Monsters magazine.

It succeeds in being comic booky right down to the stylized look of the zombies. The ending with the looming shadow of a threatening zombie really bears out that comic book look.

A great movie for it's type of genre. Not really scary anymore but a lot of fun.

Mike