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Reviews
The Cider House Rules (1999)
A whole lot of not much
"The Cider House Rules" opened beautifully and magically only to resort to contrived plot twists and hokiness. Comparing this movie to the director's far superior "What's Eating Gilbert Grape," the coming of age hero didn't quite know if he was supposed to act like Depp or like DiCaprio. Maguire's subtle acting seemed at times that he may be mentally challenged. Theron showed an opportunity to show her rosy cheeks. She didn't show much of anything else in this movie. She seemed lost in a movie without demons trying to take over her husband (The Astronaut's Wife and The Devil's Advocate). I simply didn't care for any of the characters except the small children, who still seemed to be placed in for cuteness effects. This movie is simply the failed equation that the producers believed would be failproof. Beautiful Maine + stereotypical romantic story + cute orphan kids = Oscar potential. If I was the math professor I'd make the student who wrote this awful equation stay after class.
Bloodeaters (1980)
not in it for the quality
Bloodeaters (a.k.a. Toxic Zombies) seemed to be a 1980's satire on propaganda such as Reefer Madness or Teenage Devil Dolls. The movie itself is toxic, but the entertainment factor delivered by such makes this movie more than what it is. I'm surprised that it is not more of a cult classic. It doesn't take itself seriously, but neither does much satire. This terrible movie is a gem simply to sit and laugh at. For this factor, we'll give it a three out of ten.