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Jimmel
Reviews
Blue Crush (2002)
Baywatch: the Movie???
What a horribly lame movie this is. First, the bad acting almost makes it a comedy...almost! Second, the plot...what plot? It's as if someone just through all these self proclaimed actors together and just started filming! And third, I can't imagine what some of these reviewers are referring to when they describe cinematography and sound. It's mediocre at best. I was laughing through most of this movie watching the actors struggling at their attempt at creating drama. It's one of those films that is so bad that you can't help watching it. An unintentional comedy! I get the feeling this movie was just a vehicle to parade a lot of T & A across the screen. So, if you have the sexual maturity level of a junior high school student or have an IQ of 60 or lower (or both) you'll probably enjoy this. Otherwise, forget this bomb. I can only think of about ten thousand movies that would be more entertaining!
Mulholland Dr. (2001)
David Lynch should stick to the television
This should have been a made-for-TV movie. It runs like a soap opera jumping all over the place, making no sense at all. It's like watching a cartoon where nothing has to make sense. It isn't "deep", "complex" or "genius" as some have claimed. It's just plain dumb! It always amazes me when a writer, director, comedian or whatever is terrible at what they do and their cult followers claim "it's because they're genius and too complex for us and they are criticized only because people don't understand them"! No, it's because they're inept at their job and should be doing something else for a living! It takes absolutely no talent at all to throw together a mystery that will boggle the viewers minds when it lacks any kind of logic.
This thing just runs all over the place as if it were the rambling imagination of a young child with ADD. It's not surprising it came from the mind of director whose roots are in TV where the average attention span is thirty minutes. After watching this I thought either David Lynch did a few too many mind altering drugs in his younger years or simply can't get out of his made-for-TV mentality. Then I read that this was originally meant to be a pilot for a TV series and was only an hour long! The project got scrapped(as it should have been)and so David Lynch managed to get enough funds to throw together(literally!) some additional footage and presto, we have a movie! And what a surprise! This is exactly what this thing looks like, a Frankenstein of a film made from many different pieces that don't match. David Lynch should stay where he fits in. Television!
Ocean's Eleven (2001)
Skip this waste of time and see the original
This movie is a complete waste of time. It's hard to believe anyone could have this much talent at their disposal and only succeed in boring the audience for two hours. First the story doesn't even vaguely resemble the original. It's obvious they were just trying to profit from the success of the original film by using the title and writing a completely different story. A really DULL story! The acting talent is totally wasted in this film, except for Julia Roberts who doesn't have any anyway. She plays that same old booorrrriiiinngg character she plays in every film. It's really painful to sit and endure her feeble attempt at acting. For the life of me I can't understand why they keep sticking her in these films! Anyway, back to this sleeping aid, the film just lacks anything at all that could make it interesting or fun. At the end of it you'll be asking yourself, what was the point? Why did they make this? And what does it have to do with the original other than stealing it's name and reputation? Aparently they thought showing a lot of ridiculous, impossible high tech equipment could carry the film. Fortunately I didn't pay to sit through this or I'd feel more robbed than the casino. Incidently, I don't know why other reviewers are warning about spoilers in their reviews. There ARE no spoilers because there ARE no surprises in this worthless waste of time. Do yourself a favor and just rent the original.
Blow (2001)
an uninteresting film about an uninteresting person
This movie is an attempt to paint a sympathetic picture of an utterly useless human being. It's the story of the rise and fall of George Jung, the biggest cocaine dealer in the country at one time. The director makes a laughable attempt at making us feel bad for this blood sucking parasite on society by showing how the people he surrounded himself with did him wrong. He actually tries to make this drug dealing bum who never at any point in his life attempted to work for a living look like a victim because his drug dealing associates back stabbed him. And all of this is despite being raised by a decent family. It's obvious that by informing us at the end of the film that his daughter has not visited him yet in prison, that the director feels this just isn't right. It's obviously supposed to be a sad ending. But anyone with any morals at all will feel a sense of justice and will come away feeling like George Jung got exactly what he deserved, lost exactly what he deserved, and is exactly where he belongs! I don't think I have ever seen a worse case of a film attempting to make a victim out of a perpetrator. One can only believe that the director must have dealt drugs at one time to feel so sympathetic toward such a worthless excuse for a life. The only thing that makes this film even bearable is Johnny Depp's permomance as George Jung and Ray Liotta's as his father. The rest of the cast might just as well have not been there.
American History X (1998)
Cinematically: A great movie...Realistically: Typical Hollywood politics
I would place this movie in the same category as the movie J.F.K., a very well done movie but a lot to swallow. It is obviously very biased in it's political point of view.
First, Derek is sent to prison for shooting armed burglars who have entered his property and are attempting to steal his truck. One of the burglars is standing in front of the door of Derek's house with a gun in his hand while another one uses a tire iron to smash the window of his truck and Derek shoots them. The director's intent was obviously to imply that he was wrong to shoot these dangerous armed criminals. Is it me or are there other people out who would have shot them as well? Perhaps he should have waited to see if they were going to use their weapons first!
Then of course he meets this wonderful, caring, selfless black man while he's in prison. Just the kind of people we all know our prisons are full of! Sort of makes you want to go to prison so you can hang with all these great guys, doesn't it? And of course when Derek finally gets out he's a changed man! Hello??? Reality check??? In the real world Derek's racial views would only have been reinforced with his prison stay.
And if that isn't enough to show the political bias of the film maker, Daniel's teacher tells Murray that the problem started way before Derek's involvement with the white supremacists, as the movie then goes to a scene with Derek's father criticizing affirmative action, implying that this politcal view alone makes him a racist!
These are just a few of the many ridiculous political holes in this film. There are many more. I almost expected to see Jesse Jackson's name in the credits as producer or director! While this film is entertaining and will definitely hold your attention, it is a typical Hollywood film attempting to preach typical Hollywood politics.
Krippendorf's Tribe (1998)
Not Richard Dreyfuss at his best but a very funny movie
I can't believe how everyone is ready to crucify Richard Dreyfuss for doing this movie. Give the guy a break! It's light comedy. It isn't meant to be Shakespeare! Because Richard Dreyfuss has done some marvelous acting in some great roles, he's not allowed take anything but dramatic roles? Not every movie has to be socially redeeming with likeable, moral characters. This is not Richard Dreyfuss at his best by any means, but it also isn't as bad as everyone is making out either. I don't think this movie would be judged quite so harshly if it weren't Richard Dreyfuss in the lead role and that is a real shame. He is a talented actor who is capable of playing a wide variety of characters, not the least of which includes comedy(He was hysterical in "Moon over Parador"). Lighten up everyone. "Great actors" should be allowed to do roles that aren't necessarily "great".
A Civil Action (1998)
An incredibly stupid movie about an incredibly stupid lawyer
This is positively the worst legal movie I have ever seen. Even a decent cast couldn't save this one. Travolta's character was obviously suppose to be a virtuous lawyer but instead comes across as an arrogant self-righteous, bumbling fool with more ego than intelligence. You begin to wonder how he managed to pass the bar exam. By the end of the movie you won't care whether he wins or not, and in fact, may even find yourself hoping he loses! Don't waste your time on this one. It can be summarized like this: A bad movie about a bad lawyer.