Change Your Image
Romana-5
Reviews
Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie (1996)
"Oh great, I just know they're gonna probe my anus!!!"
As an avid watcher of MST3k since February 14, 1994, I have to say that this movie was a fabulous effort on the part of Best Brains production company. I saw this movie in a tiny theater in downtown Madison, Wisconsin. Just being around other MSTies and laughing together at this extension of the show we all loved was a thrilling experience. Since then, I have watched this movie so many times that I have most of it memorized. There is no doubt that some of the jokes are tamer and some of the humour is not quite up to the par of the show; this is all because of the big studio that was marketing the movie. Apparently, many of the jokes were considered too "obscure" for audiences and the original ending was cut. The big money-grubbing studio that took over control of this movie must have decided that we weren't smart enough to handle all of these "in-jokes". All they did was take away one of the main reasons people love this show. The more obscure the comment, the funnier it is if you understand it; if you don't understand it now, there's always the chance of discovery later. What I hate most is that major control over this movie was literally taken away from the creative geniuses who best know the show. As great as this movie is, I know that it could have been better if Best Brains had been allowed to retain complete control over THEIR movie. All complaints aside, this movie is still one of the best motion pictures ever made in my opinion. The wit and creativity of Mike Nelson and Co. still shines through in all of the skits and movie segments. The movie This Island Earth was an excellent choice for ribbing. As a very colorful movie to begin with, it afforded endless oppurtunities for quipping. One thing I don't understand is the fact that, at one point in the movie, Ruth's dress changes between two scenes that are supposed to be minutes apart, and Mike and the 'bots don't say anything about it. This isn't something that would normally slip by these guys so I guess we can just chalk that one up to bad editing. True, the movie may not be as funny or as well-acted as such classic episodes as "Pod People" or "The Day the Earth Froze", but it is still a blast to watch, and offers no end of quoteable lines. A must-see if you're a die-hard fan, a casual viewer, or haven't yet been introduced to the wonderful world of Deep 13 and the SOL.
Skullduggery (1983)
I rented it!!! Someone please help me!!
I don't even know where to begin. The Scooby-like music. The frumpy male lead who, apparently, was Johnny Depp before there was Johnny Depp. The stiff, wooden females. The guy making the puzzle (I mean, what the heck does that prove?) This movie makes me want to puke whenever I see it and for some reason I see it often. You have to wonder why it is that every woman in town is unaccountably attracted to Adam. The edges of this guy's mouth are turned down so far, that even when he smiles it looks like he's frowning. But what can I say? The theme song is very catchy. It sticks to you like painful, prickly brambles. Basically, the whole movie is like a bad high school play, and obviously had the budget of one. All in all, I recommend this movie to fans of truly horrible cinema. Like me.
Nurse Betty (2000)
Just a little more Crispin Glover and this would have been perfect
Well, okay, maybe not perfect, but it was pretty close. This movie jumped from crime drama to romantic goofball comedy and back again so quickly all the way throughout that it seemed like two different movies that played simultaneously and then joined up again at the end. But they did it smoothly, and some in the theater found the bloody parts (like the scalping scene) to be funny as well. I just about threw up, but I guess that's just me. Greg Kinear is perfect as a soap opera actor. He has the ability to perform those over-dramatic soap scenes with just the right facial expressions and voice intonations. His scenes with Betty seem like something out of "Sleepless in Seattle" or some other romantic comedy like that. You almost forget that Morgan Freeman and Chris Rock are searching Betty down. Morgan Freeman's fascination with Betty was rather creepy, considering that he could practically be her grandfather, but the scenes where he is conversing with her photograph are definitely worth a few laughs! Chris Rock's performance seems rather wooden, but he has his moments. Renee Zellweger is so sweet as Betty, the lovable waitress with the crude, unfaithful husband who treats her like dirt. It's very unlikely that she would have actually gotten a job at a hospital without any real credentials, but, hey, it's a movie, just go along with it! Her roommate, Rosa, shines as well, as a woman who cares about Betty, but doesn't quite know how to deal with Betty's sickness. And, lastly, there is Crispin Glover. As a fan of his, I, naturally, thought that the movie could have been funnier had he been in it more. No one else has the same style of acting that Crispin has, and the argument between Chris Rock, Crispin, and the sheriff about the soap opera is hilarious. I guess I'm saying that I liked this movie quite a bit! If you can stomach blood, violence, and a lot of foul language, it's worth the watch and will give you plenty of laughs!
Permanent Record (1988)
I actually Cried!
When I saw this movie in the video store, I thought, "Gee, this ought to be good for a few laughs." Well, I was right to some degree, since there is some humor in the movie, but I didn't count on the compelling story and even the fine performances. The movie is about a kid named David, who seems to have the perfect life. He has a loving family with a little brother who adores him, he is accepted to a great college, he is a musical director for the school's drama production, and his band just got the opportunity to record some of their songs. But he feels very pressured, and his best friend, played by Keanu Reeves, tries to get him to lighten up a little. What nobody knows is that David feels that he can't handle the pressure anymore. One night, at a party, David goes off to the cliffs by the ocean alone. Keanu follows, but when he goes to the area where David was just standing, David has disappeared, with nowhere he could have gone but down. Keanu's life starts going down the tubes, as he is the only one who knows that David didn't die in an accident, and that information is eating him up inside. When he finally tells David's parents, he thinks that things might start to go back to normal, but, suddenly, he is taking on the responsibilities that David has left behind, including writing the music for the band. The situation is at it's worst when Keanu is driving drunk and almost runs over David's little brother. As David's father is screaming at him for being so reckless, Keanu grabs him, starts hugging him, and, tearfully, says that he was David's best friend and should have been able to stop him. This scene literally brought me to tears, and I never would have thought that Keanu Reeves would ever be able to make me cry, even though I am a big fan of his. I think this is Keanu Reeves' best performance since "River's Edge". His portrayal of this character is basically the same as his portrayal of Ted Logan in the "Bill and Ted" movies, but with much more emotion and depth. The dramatic scenes, like when he throws a book through the principal's window, are done to perfection. He is completely believable as a confused teenager who suddenly finds himself alone without a best friend. The movie itself is an accurate reproduction of the effects of suicide on the people who are left behind: David's parents, brother, and friends. This is not a lighthearted film, but it is absorbing and actually makes you care about the characters. A definite must see.