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2/10
Appalling
5 June 2006
Having always been wary of Summer Blockbuster books whose title clearly follows the magic formula of : Definite Article + Classical Reference (a name, or letter from the Greek alphabet) + Code/Conspiracy/Affair, I wouldn't have gone to see it, but a couple of friends asked me along. Well, it was nice seeing them and having a beer beforehand.

The film itself? Two and a half hours which could be usefully reduced to two, removing all the pointless flashbacks for a start. Even so, the film still lacks pace - 80% of the point in a thriller, as it creates suspense even when the scenario is painfully thin, as is the case here. It is much too easy to see what's coming next.

The acting? Apart from Ian McKellen, who does his considerable best to make something out of a two-dimensional character, it's frankly wooden. Some of these people have won awards for performances in other films, but you'd never guess. No doubt the lacklustre direction nobbled them.

All in all, an extremely disappointing film which fully merited its panning by professional critics when shown at Cannes. Don't waste time and money on it: it'll leave a sour taste in your mouth and might even put you off going to see better films with the same actors *actually being allowed to act*.

Incidentally, nobody it going to make me believe that a professor in an obscure branch of theology writes bestselling books and can afford to stay at the Ritz, any more than you can see the stars through the pollution in any major city anywhere in the world. I apologise to the other people in the cinema for bursting out laughing at this point: it really is far too over the top.
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Jean-Philippe (2006)
7/10
Allumeeeeeeeeerrrr le feu-euh
8 May 2006
Fabrice Lucchini is a frail-looking, slightly manic, literary type who is perfectly capable of doing highly successful one-man shows where he reads poetry. Casting him as a middle-class washout whose sole passion is the music of a 60-year-old rocker sounds odd, but it works.

And one night Fabrice (both the lead characters use their real first names in the film. There may or may not be a reason for this) takes a bump to the back of his head and wakes up in a parallel universe where his idol, Johnny, never made it to the French equivalent of "Opportunity Knocks", was never Discovered, never became a star...

Johnny Hallyday is the stage name of one Jean-Philippe Smet (hence the title). Think of him as,say, the French equivalent of Cliff Richard. Still going strong at 60, whether or not you like his music you have to recognise he has undeniable talent as a musician. He also turns in quite a creditable performance for the film, and is a realistic counterweight to the effervescent Lucchini.

The film is a pleasant, and eminently watchable, comedy. There are plenty of good jokes, although those who don't follow French popular culture might miss one or two references. It shouldn't spoil the film. Enjoy.
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3/10
Seriously overrated
3 May 2006
I didn't see the first one: the trailer was enough to put me off. I didn't want to see the sequel either, but everyone else did. So I tagged along.

Not having seen the trailer, I didn't have the faintest idea of what I was about to suffer. I think I smiled twice during the whole film, not a very good average.

OK, so the vultures were good, but it's not enough to make a whole film. Mind you, despite the enthusiasm of others to see the film, I didn't hear much laughter around me. The room for this screen was only about 2/3 full at best, although a lot of people had been buying tickets to see other films. The complex was overrun despite it being the Sunday of a long weekend in Springtime, when most people tend to go away for a quick break.

Boring and unoriginal, although better than some of the crap Disney has been churning out in recent years. At best, suitable for very small children, up to about age 8.
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8/10
Extremely silly
6 September 2005
There are a few slow passages, particularly in the beginning, but hang on as the wait is worth it. Many thanks to Paul Merton for choosing this film for showing on the Beeb while I was passing through the UK.

The mildly incestuous meeting of true Goonery and incipient Pythonism, liberally seasoned with Beatlitude, is a joy to the eyes and ears, through both of which it must pass to tickle the humour centres located in the brain. Those dispossessed of a brain please move along.

In 2005 it hasn't aged particularly, apart from haircuts - and, I was going to say, fashion but neo-hippy is currently in style so you won't notice. The humour is as sharp as ever. Go find a copy and watch it.
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2/10
A film for two actors and a host of cardboard cutouts
2 April 2005
Overlong (2 hours), minimal character development, no scenario, no nothings. I have never yet fallen asleep in the cinema, but this time it was a close-run thing, and judging by the lack of animation from my fellow cinema-goers I wasn't alone in this.

2-dimensional characters, inane dialogue (except in the first half, where Mitterrand's acid tongue is occasionally allowed out for a run).

Boring, boring, boring. It doesn't even cut it as a rather flat documentary, since the director freely admits taking liberties with what Mitterrand really said and did.

Avoid this film, unless of course you're an insomniac.
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Hook (1991)
6/10
Pleasant interlude
6 November 2000
Worth watching with the kids, if only for Hoffman's gleeful performance of the all-time favourite pantomime baddie.

A film you can't help enjoying, simply because everyone obviously enjoyed making it. Infectious.
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