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Star Trek: Lower Decks: Wej Duj (2021)
Season 2, Episode 9
10/10
Lower Decks grew its beard twice as long, twice as fast
7 October 2021
Warning: Spoilers
Season 2 of Lower Decks has been strong. After "I, Excretus," I thought we had seen this team at its best. That previous episode had every piece perfectly aligned, and expertly deployed so much of the intense character-building we've been treated to so far. How could it get better from there?

Wej Duj ("Three Ships") is a masterpiece of Lower Decks and of Star Trek. It is incredible television.

Lower Decks understands that Star Trek is, at its core, an office drama on the high seas. It is adventure and mystery experienced as the day-jobs of fantastically competent and good-hearted people. Familiar and unfamiliar faces all have their part to play in building this elaborate future of ours.

Wej Duj just gets it. It gets Star Trek, and it gets Lower Deck's place in that universe. It shows us the "Lower Decks" (the behind-the-scenes, under-the-bulkhead, behind-the-transporter-console workadays of Starfleet, as opposed to its captains and heroes), this time from the perspective of our crew on the Cerritos, a Klingon ship, and a Vulcan ship.

All three cultures are already richly explored in Star Trek and wej Duj wastes no time reiterating what these societies are about. It shows us, with breathtaking efficiency, the different values and drives behind each one - and contextualizes them in how those cultures are experienced by their own workadays. The Vulcan "rebel" who is practically declared insane for merely having instincts, the Klingon rebel-with-a-cause desperate both for honor and for the approval of a dishonorable captain, are stacked up next to Ensign Boimler - who is, to put it mildly, a Star Trek fan in uniform.

All three stories show us people struggling to find joy in societies which have become staid and aimless. Our Vulcan ensign is belittled, in cripplingly acerbic Vulcan fashion, for marginally expanding herself a hair's breadth beyond her literal duties. Our Klingon soldier finds himself groaning under the weight of an overbearing captain who is ruthless, dangerous, everything a Klingon is likely told to be by Klingon television - except that his captain is a dishonorable, craven traitor, as if the House of Duras was still able to field ships in the 2380s.

If that last reference made no sense to you, don't worry. Lower Decks does not need you to be utterly steeped in Star Trek lore. It will teach it to you, in the funniest way possible. Lower Decks has mastered the art of snarky fan service: rewarding us with tiny easter eggs like pink Klingon blood and Vulcans quoting Spock verbatim, in a way that both pokes fun at, and genuinely points out the existential weaknesses of, this great Star Trek canon we've built for fifty years.

The Cerritos crew starts with a corporate-life mundanity agonizingly familiar to anyone working today: fake socialization with the management. All of our crew accidentally find themselves having a blast with their bosses - except Boimler, of course, who can never get out of his own way long enough to live up to Starfleet and his own ideals. Does it matter that Boimler's fumble is the same gaffe pulled by LaVelle in the Next Generation episode called "Lower Decks" - trying to schmooze with a superior by concocting a shared place of birth, only to fall utterly and obviously flat? Only a little. If you aren't a Star Trek fan you'll feel the agony of your own fake sincerity amounting to nothing with the boss. And if you are, you'll chuckle grimly just a little bit louder. As always Lower Decks finds way to reward you for being a fan, but not punishing you for not.

Lower Decks has already built its own perfectly absurd villain - the Pakleds. Aboard the "crumship Pakled" (yes, they called the Pakleds called their ship Pakled, and yes, its ship class is identified onscreen as a crumship), we see our Klingon captain betraying the galaxy by selling weapons to doofuses and leaving the Pakleds to wage war on the Federation by themselves with stolen Klingon bombs. What's a Klingon solider to do when he needs the approval of such a dishonorable leader in order to advance?

The Cerritos and the Vulcan ship converge and join forces against the Pakleds in a beautifully-animated space battle. The Vulcan ship is only there because our erstwhile Vulcan ensign's disreputably fun science project tweaked the sensors a little bit. The Cerritos, too, is there on accident, only diverted from its otherwise-dull cruise because of the ingrained natural curiosity of its crew. Our guys triumph because the tiny background contributions of their respective nobodies made all the difference.

And our Klingon soldier finds himself at the exact right moment. How? Oh, you know. "Klingon stuff." He sheathes his knife into his captain's heart, takes command of the ship, and warps off to Klingon space to expose the vanity and treachery of his own captain. Instead of seeking his captain's approval, our newly-minted Klingon warrior follows his heart and maximizes his own potential by rebelling against the cynical version of his own culture epitomized by his captain.

Just as the Vulcan's logic wins the day against the oppressive faux-logic of her own military, which has replaced dispassionate Vulcan wisdom with disinterested Vulcan conformity. She, too, rebels in her own way, not by telling Vulcan culture to go screw, but by finding its long-buried heart under the layers of bureaucracy that have stifled it. Just as Boimler, our dyed-in-the-wool Trekkie, is always at risk of having his Wesley-like bright-eyed curiosity about the universe crushed under the trivialities of working life.

Just like all of us Star Trek nerds, really. If you aren't a Star Trek nerd, you've felt this somewhere in your life. Some hobby or passion you've felt excluded from not because of some fault in your interests, but through some fault of the people who have taken it over, commercialized it, homogenized it, ground it up and scattered it across a spreadsheet when it belongs in the realm of pure fun and joy. You know exactly what all three of these Lower Decks crews' lives are like, how you go through your life shielding the tiny flickering candle of your own joy against the horrendous bluster of modern life. It isn't the wind's fault - but you still have to keep the candle burning, and by God is it hard.

Every frame of this episode is perfectly-placed. The Lower Decks team has built out a Simpsons-scale cast of characters who we know, and feel like we understand, with only a few combined hours across seasons 1 and 2. You don't even notice how "in-character" the Lower Decks main cast, the bridge crew, even the one-offers and one-liners of episodes past fit perfectly into the story. Every episode is animated more beautifully than the last and this episode is no exception. The music - always a strong suit of Lower Decks's - is full of musical phrases familiar to Star Trek nerds alone, but designed to immaculately set and advance the mood even if you aren't.

As a Star Trek nerd, I confidently say that this is top-ten all-time Star Trek. But maybe more importantly, it is somehow also, finally, at last, the most perfect answer to your friends' eternal question: "I've never seen Star Trek before. Where do I start?"

You start with Lower Decks. In fact, I think you start with wej Duj. There is no more efficient an explanation of so much of Star Trek's lore and history, its feel for curiosity, exploration, personal growth, self-actualization, than wej Duj. It helps that it is a fantastically well-directed episode with peak performances by all cast and production team. Welcome aboard.
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Farscape: Nerve (2000)
Season 1, Episode 19
8/10
Peacekeepers are back
22 July 2019
Warning: Spoilers
Perhaps sensing that the Peacekeepers had lost much of their scare value after several recent episodes in which they have been so easily overpowered, bamboozled, bug-infested, rank-pulled, and out-backflipped by the crew, we are introduced to a brand new Peacekeeper supervillain who is every bit as intimidating as we were meant to find Crais in the beginning.

As part of an elaborate scheme to save Sun from an injury that can be healed only with Peacekeeper technology, we return to the Top Secret Base (which appears to be quite public knowledge). The burst of continuity that follows is wonderful. The Peacekeeper engineer from the abandoned ship several episodes back returns in every detail, right down to the unrequited love interest in Crichton. The interesting tension this brings drives the plot, which is tense and unnerving.

The new Peacekeeper villain, a masked albino in a ninja costume and a Bane mask, is everything Crais is not - genuinely cruel and scary, embodying the elements of the Peacekeepers we were meant to find scary but which, to date, we have not. He is a violent interrogator extraordinaire who lacks even the baseline humanity of other Peacekeepers who, as we have seen, are at least susceptible to weaknesses like vice, honor, and mild heatstroke. The new villain is not.

This is the first real cliffhangar two-parter we have seen so far and we are set up for the crew once again facing the choice of "escape but one of us dies" vs. "go back for our friend but maybe we all die." It is obvious what we will choose, but it will take some elaborate plot that will surely astound us all to rescue Crichton from the clutches of the evil Peacekeeper commander. Can't wait.
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Farscape: A Bug's Life (1999)
Season 1, Episode 18
8/10
More Bugs Please
22 July 2019
Warning: Spoilers
This deceptively-titled episode lacked a single insect. Instead we were treated to a not-so-subtle homage to The Thing, complete with its most iconic alien-detector scene reenacted almost shot-for-shot.

Rather than shapeshifting, this critter leaps from person to person. Despite being able to infect only a single person at a time and leaves its victims a little dazed but then permanently immune to re-infection, we are led to believe this creature poses a grave threat to all the galaxy. The supposed crack team of Peacekeepers who are ferrying the creature around in stasis are so breathtakingly incompetent that they are, of course, the only casualties of the menace.

The creature's effects on the crew are inconsistent. Sometimes it renders its host mute and dazed, other times it seems to turn them to violent rage, and in others (like the highly-disposable Peacekeepers) it seems to do nothing at all except badly attempt to blend in.

The episode nicely builds towards what is clearly its intended nucleus of its re-telling of The Thing's alien detection scene. There is enough tension that it feels much the same, and the scene is well-produced. Either the entire cast was instructed to re-watch the movie, or the Thing itself has possessed Ben Crowder. Either way, the episode spends a little too much time getting us to what we know is its intended climax, for example wasting time trying to get us to understand why the Peacekeepers are there in the first place and showing the crew "blending in" with them, but is otherwise a creepy and high-tension episode.
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Farscape: Through the Looking Glass (1999)
Season 1, Episode 17
4/10
Somebody turn off that darn Blue!
22 July 2019
Warning: Spoilers
In an effort to prove that she is still capable of protecting the crew, Moya teleports the crew into a technicolor nightmare consisting of three different color-coded copies of itself. We get to spend the episode in each of the three wonderful worlds of Loud, Funny, and Headaches.

The opening sequence tantalizes us with the promise of a character-building episode that may give us some more insights into our new crew member, before we are tragically dragged away into a nonsensical noodle-scratcher of an episode that accomplishes none of Act 1's promise to restore our faith in Moya. Far from it, we now get to spend the rest of the series certain that our beloved ship could expose us to danger most incomprehensible any time it tries to fire up the inconsistently-powered starburst drive.

The crew's dedication to preventing the ship from miscarrying its child is the only familiar plot point we have to hang onto here. We are otherwise briefly introduced to a poorly-designed alien puppet whose job, at which it appears to be terrible, is to prevent inter-dimensional shennanigans of the sort that Moya is apparently able to cause at any time.

It is further revealed that the ship is always listening to the crew. This creepy, 2001-esque revelation leaves the crew slightly upset where they should be horrified. Has the ship listened in without assistance every time the crew has been nearly shot, boiled, abducted, or betrayed? Apparently, and the crew seems unconcerned with the level of carelessness this has implied on Moya's behalf for the entire season so far.

It is hard to even notice what Act 2 is meant to contribute to the plot because we spent most of it quickly turning the volume down when Crichton emerges into the Loud Universe. He spends the remainder of the episode just trying to figure out what went wrong, and the solution to the problem appears as quickly and haphazardly as the problem itself.

All told, the crew does nothing, the ship reveals itself to be an incompetent snoop to which Pilot is a co-conspirator, and the self-created problem solves itself. It is low tension, low comprehension, and low impact.
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Farscape: A Human Reaction (1999)
Season 1, Episode 16
4/10
A dizzying return to Earth
2 June 2019
Warning: Spoilers
For the first time all season we learn that Crichton may actually have an interest in returning to Earth someday. Here, he gets his chance - supposedly - and is met with a planet driven bananas by paranoia after his apparent disappearance has put the rest of the world on edge.

The viewer is clued into the fact that this is an illusion by Rigel's gruesome "death" in the second act. Just to drive the point home, the writers gave us an even more implausible hookup between the chemistry-free Sun and Crichton to let us know that no, this is not really happening.

What happened was an illusion. More particularly, it was an illusion assembled by weird, dizzying camerawork seemingly designed to naueseate and annoy. This episode is full of unnecessary whirling shots, strange lighting work, even an entire conversation between Crichton and one of the worst alien animatronics yet seen that proceeds through with fade-in fade-out effects literally between each line of the exchange.

This episode depends on "human" villains we do not know or care about and ends with an explanation that conveniently obviates any actual or potential accomplishments to the whole episode. The poor visual elements do not help the stilted and obvious story. The final reveal comes at us quickly, mercifully enough since we have known for half an hour that it was an illusion. Whenever Crichton does get back to Earth, I hope it is with a camera operator a little steadier on their feet.
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Farscape: Jeremiah Crichton (1999)
Season 1, Episode 14
7/10
The Cosmic Castaway
25 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
Problematic racial undertones aside, this is a well-paced Dances with Wolves analog. The crew spends months searching for Crichton after he goes out for a drive and is left behind in a freak starburst accident. Unlike the crew of previous episodes who showed no qualms about abandoning or betraying each other at the drop of a hat, this time the rest of the gang spends months searching for him only to find him marooned on an alien Hawaii. Internal alien politics and religion take over from there.

Rigel does almost all of the heavy lifting in terms of saving everybody from the backwards alien locals. Just as Crichton and D'Argo are about to be executing by a spear-wielding native in one of many scenes that has aged extraordinarily poorly, Rigel finds himself hailed as the aliens' god on account of his odd similarity to a religious monument. He basks in it briefly, but ultimately does the right thing by disabusing the natives of their beliefs (their religion being a corruption of Rigel's own peoples' propaganda) and bringing the gang home safely.

The religious element is complicated but has a decidedly Who Watches the Watchers feel to it. The personalities behind the alien politics and religion are well-defined. In true Farscape style we have a crisp understanding of many layers of the aliens' culture and legal system without even realizing it; this is one of many episodes where the writers show a real talent for breathtakingly fast-paced worldbuilding.

All told a competently crafted episode with little action but strong dialog and great humor, particularly for Rigel whose screen time has been lacking of late.
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Farscape: Rhapsody in Blue (1999)
Season 1, Episode 13
3/10
Blue Cloistered Cult
22 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
Zhaan's whackadoodle religion takes a much-unwanted center stage in this 48-minute homage to Tool album covers and electronics commercials from the 1980s. While running an errand, the crew stumbles across a thriving Scientology outpost where dreams come true and also everyone is half-evil, half-good depending on which side of the commercial break you're on. The gang is mostly aware that something is amiss as a rogue band of Delvians decides to start incapacitating them in order to either punish Zhaan, steal Zhaan's powers, or befriend Zhaan depending on which side of the commercial break you're on.

The sole narrative achievement gained by all this is that we learn through flashbacks that Crichton once loved a woman and Zhaan is a murderer. That either is supposed to be a surprising revelation is one of many misunderstandings this episode revels in. Another is that anyone is particularly interested in what level of space-wizard Zhaan is, or that we are dying to know the intricate details of how telepathy works. We are not.

The Delvian temple that serves as the backdrop to this mess of a script is gorgeously constructed and that is approximately as far as the charm in this episode goes. It is otherwise the opportunity, which nobody asked for, to prove than Zhaan has nearly godlike telepathic powers that will either never be seen again or that will solve literally every problem for the rest of the series.

The gang is mostly useless in solving whatever the underlying problem is. Sun and D'Argo are incapacitated by obvious delusions aboard ship, while Crichton spends most of the episode arguing with his imaginary wife about whether or not she really exists. Crichton achieves the apotheosis of his obtuseness when he actually loses an argument with her on this point, with the illusion taking the side of reason.

Zhaan's ascent to the status of living McGuffin is complete. She achieves Tenth Level space wizard rank, which you can tell is important because her eyes change color slightly and she whispers a lot. By the end of the episode it is clear that something profound has happened, but I have no idea what it is.

Overall a skippable episode that leaves us to wonder why Zhaan is still in the crew at all. She has clearly become something powerful and occasionally malevolent, but nobody - especially not the writers - knows what to do with it.
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Farscape: The Flax (1999)
Season 1, Episode 12
9/10
Three Tons
21 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
Farscape whips out another A/B/C plot and manages to balance three high-tension storylines all at once. D'Argo and a well-acted alien guest star - a Thaddeun Okona type, a goofy alien thief with a heart of gold - race to escape a pirates' space trap, the same that has ensnared Sun and Crichton and pitted them in a race against a diminishing oxygen supply. Rigel, meanwhile, gambles with the space pirates themselves, throwing a game to save the gang in what may be his first genuinely useful plan.

Certain elements are gratuitous. Sun and Crichton are trapped together in shall we say an over-ventilated shuttlecraft because, of course, the writers want Crichton to end up teaching Sun CPR for the poorly-executed passionate embrace at the end of the episode. D'Argo's situation is more purposeful. He has bargained his way home for the very survival of his shipmates, only to give it all up to save them at the end to show us that he has come to grudgingly accept that his new role is as protector of this crew and that he is no longer willing to go to any lengths to get home. At the very least, he won't kill all of his friends in order to do it.

Rigel and D'Argo come out of this episode looking like the heroes, which is a first for Rigel and a welcome reprieve from what has been an otherwise increasingly marginal role as a wise-cracking sidekick at best. Drafting this review mere moments after the episode ends I sincerely cannot remember Zhaan or Pilot doing anything of value in this episode, which is a worrisome trend that for Zhaan has persisted for nearly three episodes now.

All told the script is well-drafted and the episode moves briskly. Blink and you'll miss any of the crowded storylines' immaculately-paced transitions from immediate danger to immediate catastrophe and back again. This episode loses points only because the circumstances under which the writers have pushed Crichton and Sun into a love story have been so obvious and have flown in the face of the actors' utter lack of genuine chemistry.
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Farscape: Till the Blood Runs Clear (1999)
Season 1, Episode 11
5/10
Sidetracked
20 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
Annoying guest characters are saddled with much of the meandering storyline of this episode, where the gang finds themselves in need of repairs on a planet of dusty technical types without much going on. The main thrust of this episode seems to remind us that the Farscape crew is still being pursued by the Peacekeepers, now in the form of breathtakingly incompetent bounty hunters.

The other seemingly lost thread that this episode picks up is that Crichton might actually want to return home at some point. He leads off the episode on the cusp of recreating the accident that brought him into deep space in the first place. Consistent with his almost complete lack of effort to get home so far, he ultimately trades the data away for parts and labor on a ship he has barely used since the series began.

D'Argo's Worf Syndrome just gets worse. He is sold to us as the ship's resident warrior, which means that it is his fate to be constantly (and easily) overpowered just to prove how dangerous the situation is. This is a particularly gratuitous case, with D'Argo captured and tortured by two rat-like bounty hunters who are so transparently stupid it is a wonder how they got this close to the gang in the first place.

Other minor plot threads pick up and fall off as soon as they are found. Sun is offered the chance to surrender, momentarily considers it, and declines, only to herself be savagely beaten by a bounty hunter in a slow-paced fistfight that ends when a badly-acted obese mechanic somehow saves this trained soldier from danger.

All in all this episode relies on an implausible vision of the crew as utterly incapable of defending themselves. Crichton wants to get home - or doesn't. Zhaan spends most of the episode sunbathing, contributing none of what should be her considerable warrior prowess to defending her friends or her ship. Rigel's thirty seconds of screen time are wasted in a very low-tension conversation about Zhaan's body that, like the rest of the episode, accomlishes nothing and does nothing to drive the series forward.
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Farscape: They've Got a Secret (1999)
Season 1, Episode 10
9/10
Unpeeling
20 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
This episode finally pulls back the curtain on both D'Argo and the ship, both of whom take center stage as the driving force behind the story. Despite being the most action-free episode so far the story proceed at a brisk pace. Serious injury to both D'Argo and Moya at the same time lets their own various traumas take center stage.

We learn that D'Argo's true crime was a soap opera-like feud with his now-dead Peacekeeper wife's family that left his son an exile and he a prisoner. The secret he has kept so close to his chest is revealed through a digital locket that he keeps quite literally close to his heart, showing that his son has remained hidden for many years for his own safety. In a trance-like state he reveals this all to us, with the only levity coming in D'Argo's mistaking Rigel for his own son and the various other roles that the gang takes in D'Argo's waking hallucinations.

As for Moya - she's pregnant. We don't know why or how other than that the Peacekeepers were preventing it through equipment that has now been destroyed. Discovering that Moya's seeming breakdowns are the result of this pregnancy is the end of the story, leaving us with many mysteries not the least of which is how spaceships get pregnant in the first place and if we now have a little fleet of baby spaceships to look forward to. More importantly we learn that Moya has something like a personality, somewhat primitively biological in the sense that the ship seems unable to communicate or react except to protect itself and its offspring save for what can be communicated through the cute little robot bugs that serve as the ship's maintenance team.

D'Argo's story is somewhat resolved in this episode to the extent that we now know quite a bit more about him. Moya, on the other hand, is now more questions than answers for us (who is the father, for example, and why do the Peacekeepers want to keep these ships from reproducing at all?). Pilot has been unhelpfully unconscious for the entire episode right when he is needed most.

All around a well-told, if slightly soap opera-like story, which even without any fisticuffs or deep use of special effects is engaging and watchable. The performances are strong and the cheap sarcasm that has made up much of Crichton's dialog to date is mercifully absent.
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Farscape: DNA Mad Scientist (1999)
Season 1, Episode 9
9/10
Brothers in Arms
18 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
This episode is the first story we get that shows the crew's real desperation to get home. Where the gang has so far been mostly content to bop around the galaxy on miscellaneous adventures, the opportunity to buy a map to their respective homes drives the crew to their most cruel, self-serving depths yet.

The previous episode ended with Zhaan's demons fully uncorked and now we see the results. Without hesitation she and D'Argo forcibly amputate one of Pilot's arms as compensation for a cruel scientist who promises to sell the crew a map to each of their respective homeworlds.

Where Zhaan, D'Argo, and Rigel instantly set upon each other when it is revealed that the scientist's map is mostly useless and can only show the road home for one of them, Crichton is excluded because Earth is unknown to anyone apparently and Sun is not lost, she is exiled. Where this realization instantly sinks Sun into a deep and desperate depression, Crichton is seemingly unaffected - as with the rest of the series, he seems to have no particular interest in going home at all.

The alien scientist, a creepy, lumbering cat-like being is masterfully constructed. The suit is angular and huge, intimidating even from a distance, and is well acted. The creature itself is unspeakably cruel. All along it has been trading scientific knowledge for lab rats to torment, and Sun falls victim next. Her desperation to find a safe place to escape to shows us that she has fallen so far from Peacekeeper society that she is even willing to submit to once unthinkable medical experiments for the opportunity to find somewhere to "fit in."

The lesson nobody aboard seems to learn that they already fit in with each other. Crichton, Pilot, and Sun work together to undo the damage and save the day, where the other three - Zhaan, D'Argo, and Rigel - have each become violent and selfish, spending most of the episode trying to open the map at the expense of the other two.

The creepy atmosphere, immaculate effects, and truly compelling villain aptly analogized to Joseph Mengele sell this episode. It is the strongest story in season 1 yet. The difficulty it poses for us is seeing how this crew ever gets its mojo back after spending most of this episode literally tearing each other to pieces.
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Farscape: That Old Black Magic (1999)
Season 1, Episode 8
8/10
The Wizarding World of Revenge
18 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
The gang's first real confrontation with the Peacekeeper captain sworn to kill Crichton is set against the backdrop of a spooky alien wizard who draws power from violence. The Day of the Dove-style setup resolves quite differently from the Star Trek episode from which this episode clearly draws inspiration.

The alien world enthralled by the mysterious wizard is gloomy, well-designed, and instantly convincing. Even its animals are memorable. Zhaan is revealed to be every bit as dangerous as the alien enemy when she lets her violent past overcome her instinct to resolve every problem peacefully.

D'Argo and Sun do nothing in this episode except serve to prove that force alone will not solve the problem. While Crichton duels with Crais, Zhaan duels with her own demons. Crichton, Crais, and Zhaan are all neatly propelled to violence by forced reminders of their own pasts, most graphically Crais being driven to rage by the alien wizard's cruel visions of Crais's dead brother.

Crichton succumbs to the instinct for violence to no meaningful end, where when Zhaan gives in to the same impulse she is at least able to temporarily subdue the alien wizard at least long enough to disperse him and save the day.

This otherwise extremely dark episode is lightened only by Rigel's lighthearted B-plot that contributes nothing to the story but some much needed levity. Henson's seeming predilection for alien mucus gives us some momentary relief from the anger and rage that bleed from half the cast most of the episode.

Where Star Trek's crew defeated its death-eating wizard nemesis with laughter and merriment, Zhaan defeats evil by unleashing perhaps a greater evil within herself. The episode ends with an ominous promise that the Zhaan we know now is as possessed by malevolence figuratively as Crichton and Crais are literally for most of the episode.
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Farscape: I, E.T. (1999)
Season 1, Episode 7
7/10
Close Encounters
18 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
The Farscape take on the First Contact scenario is its Star Trekkiest episode yet. Elements of the humans-as-aliens sci fi trope from Who Watches the Watchers through A Piece of the Action are evident in this episode charmingly set in an alien backwater when the ship emergency-lands near the home of a local UFO nut belonging to a pre-alien contact race.

There is a predictable game of cat-and-mouse with the snarling paranoid military types, while Zhaan spends most of her screen time sighing and looking concerned. The setup and the resolution are both mere filler for the real goal of the story, which is to put Crichton on the other end of wonderously gazing at alien visitors - and immediately trying to abduct them.

There is little to remark upon one way or the other in terms of special effects. The "aliens" are slant-eared humans; it isn't immediately obvious they are nonhuman at all until an alien child tells us as much with a stupefied response to Crichton's appearance that turns from curiosity to terror without much explanation.

The child's alien mother first strikes us as a friend, the kind of First Encounters hopeful enthusiast many Farscape viewers likely identify with. Her turn to terror, too, is sudden and mostly without provocation.

The episode proceeds more or less as we'd expect, with a modest twist ending Star Trek viewers may recognize as the Farscape equivalent of Chicago Mobs of the Twenties. Where it will lead we don't know, nor do we particularly care because the alien race we met is somewhat bland and predictable.

The action sequences are few but are well executed. This is a competently drafted episode that only fails because it couldn't decide whether to put the gang in the position of making first contact with an alien race, or putting them in the position of escape from alien Alcatraz. It tried to do both, leaving us with inconsistent motives and personalities in the alien characters that changed on a dime. Good humor and overt homage make this an otherwise watchable episode.
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Farscape: Thank God It's Friday, Again (1999)
Season 1, Episode 6
4/10
The Other Side of Paradise
18 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
When Star Trek tried a planet of drug-pacified hippies, it failed on account of sheer ridiculousness. Farside's take on the same setup fails on a lesser scale, but the plot is still a mess held together by badly-paced conversations and an unwatchable alien princess who talks the way a snail would crawl through syrup.

An ultimately unexplained setup finds D'Argo mysteriously happy on a planet of alien dirt-farmers who are, as is obvious before act one is over but as is needlessly re-explained a half dozen times throughout the episode, turned to brainwashed slaves by a narcotic food. For some reason this same food is also a crucial ingredient in peacekeeper weapons, is highly explosive in Rigel's bodily waste, is the favorite food of a native worm that just happens to counteract the effects of the food when inhabiting an alien body, and such a worm just happens to be in the possession of a family of drug-resistant slaves who just happen to run into Crichton when he comes to rescue D'Argo.

This is approximately as serious as the episode gets.

Sun is given the chance to save the day with science, but she only gets as far as identifying the problem. This helps her save the day by turning Rigel's privates into a flamethrower, which somehow convinces the alien princess to defy the peacekeepers who somehow turned the planet on to the hypnotizing drug. It kind of saves the day, or maybe it doesn't. The ending doesn't clarify if the alien princess chooses to rebel or chooses to carry on.

D'Argo's reason for traveling to this planet is never explained. Perhaps the hope was that we would forget why when we were busy trying to figure out the rest of the episode. Nothing works particularly well this episode, and for once even the alien makeup is unconvincing and lazy. So far we have been spoiled with immaculate full-body alien costumes and Boston Dynamics-grade Henson Studios animatronics, so it is almost startling to see human actors turned barely alien with white contact lenses and too much rouge.

Between Zhaan and Chrichton touching each others' private parts for no reason and Rigel saving the day with flammable urine, this episode accomplishes truly nothing at all. If anything, we have learned only that when in peril the crew is eager to abandon each other, as most of Sun and Crichtons' dialog with each other is spent inexplicably trying to talk the other out of simply abandoning D'Argo and Zhaan to their fates. With an unexplained setup, a baffling conclusion, and a wasteland of boring fluff in between, this is an altogether highly skippable episode.
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Farscape: PK Tech Girl (1999)
Season 1, Episode 5
8/10
A Room of Sun's Own
18 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
This briskly-paced episode is equal parts action and character study. Sun and Rigel are both finally given the chance to confront their respective demons, with varying degrees of success.

The creepy first act, seemingly a "haunted house in space" setup not unlike Event Horizon or Alien, quickly turns to siege as a stranded peacekeeper engineer becomes a short-lived new friend to the crew. She helps to restore a derelict ship just in time to stop a band of frog-like scavengers lurking nearby. But more importantly, the engineer serves as a mirror and foil for Sun, an opportunity for her to reflect on the scale and depth of the loss of her pre-Farscape life. We even learn that her exile has caused her entire former regiment to be demoted to lowly positions like the engineer's. In convincing the engineer that Sun is more than a traitor, Crichton helps to redeem them both in each other's eyes - shortly before Crichton spoils the whole plotline by seducing the engineer.

Rigel meanwhile is confronted with ghosts of his own. This derelict vessel was apparently his own prison for many years, and through flashbacks we learn he has been tortured. This first glimpse into authentic Rigel emotions is unfortunately underdeveloped, given only a few minutes of airtime culminating with Rigel literally spitting in the eye of the corpse of his former warden.

D'Argo and Zhaan are left to run interference and their own chemistry flourishes for the first time but their storyline serves mostly as a backdrop to the salvage operation. The alien marauders are, as usual, at the intersection of grotesque and beautifully-constructed, in unfortunate contrast to the sorely dated CGI space battle effects. The alien creatures are, as usual, outwitted and turned away, and the gang escapes just before the peacekeepers return to reclaim their lost vessel.

This episode loses points because the Chrichton romantic subplot is entirely gratuitous and comes at the expense of the otherwise well-written gloomy reminiscence of the episode. Putting Sun on a gutted, ruined peacekeeper ship at the same time she confronts her own gutted, ruined peacekeeper career is another clever use of setting-as-metaphor in Farscape but it is all lost to the forced chemistry between her and Crichton when she catches him kissing the peacekeeper engineer. This is otherwise a fast-paced and well-executed story, with memorable aliens and memorable emotions.
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Farscape: Throne for a Loss (1999)
Season 1, Episode 4
8/10
Everybody Hates Rigel
17 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
Farscape breaks out its first A-plot / B-plot / C-plot structure with great success. Leading the A-plot is a series of eel-choreographed action sequences that have both humor and decent fight scenes. Sun and D'Argo show the first real camaraderie-chemistry that works on screen, much better than the forced sexual tension with Crichton that has so far dominated Sun's screen time.

A rapid fire first act puts the ship in peril, the crew on edge, and poor Rigel up to his puppet implements in mud. The B-plot thrives on the strong voice acting and clever writing behind what could have been the very boring stage of Rigel and his cellmate trading palace platitudes about their respective political accomplishments.

In the C-plot we finally learn more about Farscape's resident priest Zhaan. Her heart of gold bristles with purely demonstrative violence, revealing that her seemingly meek exterior is by choice, since she seems to have been a kung fu wizard all along. This is cleverly mirrored in her treatment of an alien captive, who is himself posed with true choice between violence and freedom (he makes the wrong choice, implying to us than Zhaan herself has made that same choice the other way around).

This episode is altogether successful because it evenly divides the screen between all the main characters. Rigel's pompous greed imperils his friends, who work together to save the day (and the engine component Rigel has stolen to decorate his scepter) while Zhaan shows us a dimension to her character that has so far been hidden beneath her previously bland, meditative exterior. Guest characters are well acted, including the green arthropod of immaculate and creepy construction.
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4/10
Again... and again... and again...
17 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
The trope of the succubus-assassin has never been done well and this episode is no exception. The writers at least have the decency to spare us the predictable leadup to the discovery that the mysterious alien seductress is not what she appears to be (obvious within three seconds or so of meeting her) by granting Chrichton the power to see the future. Chrichton joins us is seeing this twist coming a mile away.

The bad male-gaze tropes come fast and hard. There is a bona fide karate catfight, choreographed about as well as you'd expect, and Sun spends most of the episode with her midriff needlessly exposed and contributing little else of value.

D'Argo's seduction by the alien woman is as inexplicable as Crichton's ability to see the future. Crichton's flash-forwards force us to watch the same scenes over and over again with only minor changes. We are left bored, impatiently awaiting a resolution that in this case comes so suddenly and with so little contribution from our crew it is a wonder why they are there at all. When Star Trek, Travelers, Dark Matter, or any of the many other series that have tried this irritating plot device they have at least had the mercy to slightly vary camera angles or show different parts of the same conversations during the repeats. Here we are trapped in Groundhog Day except Bill Murray never gets any better - he just bumbles around until the problem is dues ex'd away in the final three minutes.

This is an episode without tension, an episode that lays a predictable plot device on top of scenes we have literally already seen before. It is ultimately unsatisfying. The gender politics of it are positively crusty. Perhaps its greatest error is its almost complete omission of the animatronics that have so far been the real stars of the series. The closest gift we are given is the outstanding makeup work on both of the alien visitors.

This episode is redeemed slightly by the revelation that we have a mystery in D'Argo's "true" crime. This finally adds some depth to an otherwise boring grunt who has so far done little more than snarl and trade unconvincing barbs with Crichton, who remains himself flat and undeveloped on his own.
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Farscape: Exodus from Genesis (1999)
Season 1, Episode 2
6/10
"You're starting to get the hang of this"
16 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
Farscape launches out of its pilot episode with a rollicking, action-packed monster-of-the-week episode whose alien "menace" and Star Trek-like peaceful resolution are as well-executed as the forced chemistry between Crichton and Sun is poorly.

Part The Thing, part Invasion of the Body Snatchers, the Henson touch is again the true marvel of the episode. Ornate set design continues the clever blend of grotesquely biological with futuristic. A living spaceship - part animal, part machine - becomes infested with highly intelligent beetles that are themselves both sophisticated diplomats and goop-spraying vermin. Combining meat with mechanism, sapience with slime, is a recurring dichotomy throughout the episode in the finest tradition of high-weirdness sci fi genre that Farscape otherwise seems to merely flirt with rather than embrace.

The flirtation between the "human-ish" characters is not so well-executed. The writers have elected to try Crichton as a swaggering, pop-culture-belching, wisecracking loaf who is somehow a competent boxer and a technical dunderhead, leaving us wondering if the prodigal scientist from the premier has somehow already been body snatched at the beginning of the episode. Sun's warrior prowess is nowhere to be seen, lost to a convenient species trait so impractical it forces us to believe that the Farscape galaxy lives under the tyranny of delicate snowmen who can be wilted by minutes of AC downtime.

This is episode 2. Characters are still finding their footing. I am glad to see that some recurring plot points will continue - an arc of tension between Crichton and the Peacekeeprs is kept alive, weakly, by the gratuitous sudden presence of intruding peacekeepers who vanish with as little plausible explanation as they appeared. But even as a stand-alone monster of the week it is a great success. The story is complex but efficiently told, the writers' clear familiarity with the source material of their cinematic ancestors pervades the script, and the Henson charm succeeds wildly in both the verminous alien cockroaches and our first closeup with the ship's mysterious pilot. If only the humans could stay out of the way for the aliens (and their fans) to continue dominating the best parts of the episodes so far.
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Farscape: Premiere (1999)
Season 1, Episode 1
8/10
Rich start
16 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
Has the frenzied, rapid-fire worldbuilding of Andromeda - the viewer gets a good overview of current galactic politics in just a few minutes - with a sense of mystery familiar to fans of Dark Matter. With every main character's backstories, species traits, and personalities firmly established by the end of Act 2, Farscape's premier accomplishes in its first half hour what Star Trek would take one or two seasons to reach.

Farscape rejects technobabble in favor of immersion. The technology is a blend of wonderous and gross, mechanical in a dark palette that gives the ship the feel of an alien chop shop. An alien character scoffs with irritation at having to explain how a human and a ship full of aliens can speak seemingly the same language, likely expressing the frustrations of a thousand sci fi writers' rooms full of creative minds who want to tell stories often confronted by fans who demand to know how the deuterium injectors work down to the tiniest detail. It works, the exasperated hand-waving explanation is satisfactory, and the action continues with hardly a breath.

The human protagonist is quickly established to have a heart of gold, a wondrous scientific brain, and is unrealistically handsome; he is as of the end of the episode the least interesting character on the screen. Convincing, unselfconscious alien performances elevate potentialy ridiculous, rubber-masked characters into the stars of the show.

The Henson touch bleeds through the screen. Fans of the Dark Crystal or Labyrinth will recognize the artisanal seriousness of the Jim Henson brand from a Splinter-like alien exile to a lumbering piranha-like merchant half-The Thing half-Skexis. The world-class animatronics somehow redeem the CGI effects which, like any sci fi production more than five years old, are hopelessly dated.

All told a strong start that immediately plunges the human character and the human viewers together into a fully-constructed universe that we discover, not create.
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