enjoys insanity Reviews

Crisis in the Kremlin (1992)

Note to film makers

[5/10 · 16 March 2003]

Note to film makers: When making a film staring two little known actors, make sure they don't look so much alike that it's difficult to tell them apart.

I see now that they have made a few movies, but I didn't recognize anyone in the film. At first I thought "why is he talking with an accent now?", it took awhile before I could tell the difference between the two main guys. Other than that, it was worth the 49 cents I spent to rent the movie (I can't say that about all movies).

Some of it was filmed in Sofia, Bulgaria. I don't see too many films shot in Bulgaria, so it was kind of cool to see scenery other than the standard L.A., New York, London etc.

It has a fair amount of action, and actually has a plot. There are a few lame scenes, but I've seen worse. Overall, it's worth seeing if you have four bits and some time kill.

Equinox (1970)

Bad, really bad. B-movie classic

[2/10 · 9 September 2001]

I don't know if I should give this movie a "1" or a "10". As far as movies go, this is horrible. But as far as bad movies go, this is a ten. It has everything needed to make a lame movie: poor acting, stupid reasoning ("Gee, I don't know what that sound is coming from the cave, let's check it out", or "let's split up and look for Jim"), claymation monsters, and judging by the clothes and makeup you can tell that they actually did try to make a good movie.

See this only if you like bad movies, or if it's on MST3K

The Waiters (1969)

Benny Hill fans, check this out

[6/10 · 12 August 2001]

I'm a Benny Hill fan so I liked it. If you're not a fan, well, I'm not sure if you'd like it or not. It's not his best work, he hadn't established all of his trademark smirks and faces yet, but it's well worth watching.

The 13th Warrior (1999)

Better the 2nd time around. Indiana Jones genre

[10/10 · 30 July 2001]

The first time I watched it I thought it was about a 7. But after watching it again I'd give it a 9 or a 10.

If you're going to watch this movie, you should pay attention to it, you'll get a lot more out of it. Sure, you could just veg out and watch some pretty cool fight scenes (and Antonio Banderas, if that's your thing), but then you would feel like it was just a decent movie with holes in the plot. I wouldn't call it an intellectual movie, but if you pay attention or just think for two minutes about one of the scenes in question, the story line/plot will make sense. One example

****minor spoiler******: they do switch from their language to English, but during the transition they use both, to show that he is starting to understand some of what they are saying. They only use English when he understands them. (The rate at which he learns the language is less than believable, but I don't expect movies to be perfect.)

2nd point - if you like Indiana Jones movies, you'll probably like this. It doesn't have the treasure hunting aspect, but it has action and it does have an historical aspect. I'm not an expert on 10th century European History, but from what I do know on the subject, they were historically accurate. This isn't one of those cheesy medieval films where the warriors are running around in swimsuits. They actually try in this film. It made me wish I knew more about Viking, Tartar and Arabian history to see how accurate the movie was.

American Pie (1999)

Surprisingly good

[10/10 · 26 July 2001]

After seeing the promos targeting the lowest common denominator ("just like warm apple pie" - gee I wonder what happens), I decided to avoid this movie like the plague. I figured you had to be under 17 in order to stomach the movie. I finally rented it because I was bored the other week and felt like watching some cheesy movies. I was expecting it to be this generation's "Porky's", and I was pleasantly surprised.

I can't remember the last time I laughed so hard at a movie. All the lines and attempts the guys use to pick up girls are so cheesy, but you can see how a high school guy could actually try to use some of the lines/methods (... I said *some*). You don't have to be in high school to enjoy this movie (although it wouldn't hurt). You also shouldn't be expecting anything too deep. This is just a comedy about some high school guys trying to get lucky. If you liked "Ferris Beuller's Day Off", you'll like this. Although it's a better movie since it doesn't have all the situations that would never happen like F.B.D.O. does.

The movies I watched in high school were all basically just made to show tits. This actually relies on humor instead of nudity (although there is some nudity). If you're looking for a good comedy, and not offended but the the subject of sex, watch this one. 10 out of 10

Almost Heroes (1998)

I've seen worse

[4/10 · 26 July 2001]

See Chris Farley and Matthew Perry in one of their most mediocre films ever!

I was expecting a weak, cheesy movie. That's what I got. It was slightly better than I had expected, but don't spend more than 2 bucks to rent it. The producers were hoping Chris Farley and Matthew Perry fans would pay to see this. If you're not a fan of either, don't bother. I like Chris Farley, so I didn't mind the film, but it wasn't as good as "Beverly Hills Ninja". 4 out of 10.

The Shawshank Redemption (1994)

Feeling depressed? Watch this movie. Only one flaw.

[9/10 · 26 July 2001]

I won't go into all the good things about the movie, since pretty much all of the other posts do, I'll just say I agree. There was only one thing wrong with it. Are we supposed to believe that in a prison in 1948, a black guy was best buds with a bunch of white guys? Oh well, this was made when it wasn't politically correct to have a movie with an all white cast. If you can get past that one flaw, this movie is a 10. If you can't, the movie is still an 8 or 9.

If you're depressed, this is an excellent movie to watch. It focuses on when life has really beaten you down. No matter what happens to him, he tries to get the best of the situation.