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4/10
'The Room' but it's a serious film
13 May 2024
This film is so bad that it's fun to watch. The plot is non-existant (movie title says it all), all characters are weird and the dialogues and lines are so bad that it makes me think there was no script and this all just free styling. Over-acting is a common problem with movies from the 40s-50s but this movie is an extreme case, it's tearing me apaaart! There are so many logical flaws too that I will not even bother going into detail. And why did they cast an older looking grown man as protagonist when he seems to be playing a much younger kid? The scene where the police officers asks him where his parents are is just too funny. All in all, 4/10 as a serious movie (what it was meant to be) or 8/10 if you pretend that this is satire.
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Ripley (2024)
9/10
Better than the movie
7 April 2024
Warning: Spoilers
I was sceptical at first but I really enjoyed this TV show. Black/white footage and italian language make it pleasant to watch. Even though there might only be two very tense scenes I never felt bored while watching. The only thing that bothers me is that Marge seems to be a bit dumb: When Tom introduces himself to her very early in the show, he mentions that his parents drowned in a boating accident. But when he talks to her in the last episode he mentions that they died in a car accident. She should have instantly realized that he is a liar and not to be trusted. Other than this I really enjoyed the show! 9/10.
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They Live (1988)
6/10
One of the best bad movies
10 December 2023
Warning: Spoilers
It does not get much more 80s than this. 1984 story, cheesy one-liners, terrible acting, sunglasses. It's not a good movie, but I had a lot of fun watching it. It has lots of meme potential and memorable moments, just pretend it is a dank comedy movie. The plot of course is non-sensical and I do think this movie can serve as a trigger for crazy people who watch it and then start imagining seeing things in the real world or starting to think that a secret elite is trying to control their thoughts and actions. My favorite part of the movie was the ridiculous "wear those glasses"-"no"-10 min street fight scene, that really came out of nowhere.

Overall, 6/10 not because it is a good fipm but because it is an entertaining and fun trash movie.
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5/10
Easily predictable soap opera
6 November 2023
Warning: Spoilers
Plot: It is WW2 and there is this diamond that maybe makes you invincible. Well, no one seemed to care as Hulk was allowed to just enter his workplace (museum) and take it with him as the Germans arrive.

Bad german guy is introduced, good german guy is introduced. At this point it already obvious that the bad guy is going to die and the good guy will be reformed and live on as a good guy. Of course the blind girl will survive and of course she falls in love with the good german guy. But wait, let me not advance the plot too fast.

Bad german guy wants the diamond. Oh but he needs a motive, right? So let us make up a generic illness to explain why the bad german guy will never stop to get the diamond! WHY! Being invincible is enough reason to have someone be after the diamond, no need to introduce additional cheese..

Bad german guy finds Hulk and knows that he touched the diamond, that's why his daughter is blind, the bad guy explains to the audience that is not allowed to think for themselves. So clearly Hulk must be invincible, oh but he gets killed by the bad german guy. So surely, at this point, the bad german guy realizes that the diamond never gave any superpowers, right? Nope, he still continues to chase after the diamond. [Why?]

Cut to epic 1v1: Bad german guy vs blind girl with a gun! "Your bullet holds 6 bullets, but I heard 5 shots. That means you only have one bullet left!" Well no, she could have reloaded multiple times and there is no reason why she should not have additional ammunition. Nice try to introduce cool sounding dialogue.

And then, who would have thought, the good german guy comes to save the blind girl from the bad german guy! Oh no, but it goes wrong... And the blind girl saves him! Who could have predicted this turn of events!

One of the few things I enjoyed about this show was Lars Eidingers portrayal of the bad german guy. Acting wise he did an excellent job and it is not his fault that the show happens to be badly written. Reminded me of a young Christoph Waltz in some scenes.

All in all, the main problem with 'All the light we cannot see' is that everything is easily predictable. Is the target audience assumed to be stupid? Because this is what watching this show feels like. It is a low effort story with no depth and lots of cheese. Even the most obvious points are said out loud when there really was no need to. Main character is in a difficult situation? Just let some bomb explode and only the important people stand up again (they repeated this THREE times in four episodes). Introducing a "professor" character does not automatically make your show as successful as 'Money Heist', by the way.

This show is a waste of time and I would recommend you to watch something else. 'Clair de lune' is a masterpiece and I dislike to see someone try to force it into a low quality TV show trying to boost the atmosphere without effort.

5/10.
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Oppenheimer (I) (2023)
8/10
Brilliant movie that focuses too much on politics
8 August 2023
Warning: Spoilers
I loved most parts of this film, but it should have been 30 min shorter. I understand that covering Oppies connections to the communist party is important and plays an important role to showcase what the US government did with him after the war was over, but the filmmakers spent too much time on politics, political discussions and relationships and too little time on the actual physics and world events.

When watching a Christopher Nolan movie you expect jumping around in time and I think this suits the film well. If all the action came first and then only politics the movie would be very hard to watch. Mixing everything with black/white signaling etc was the correct decision.

What I liked the most was the atmosphere. It felt like I was part at Los Alamos and waiting with the others for the bomb to go off. When Oppenheimer held his speech (you know, the disturbing one) I felt like I was inside of his head. The state of movie of Oppenheimer has been brought to film, absolutely amazing. Cilian Murphy deserves an oscar for his outstanding performance and I personally must admit that for me personally he went from being "the guy from Inception" to "the cool guy from Peaky Blinders" to one of the most gifted actors I have ever seen on film. I will be sure to watch the next movie he plays a leading role in!

I think this movie could have been a 9.5/10 with stricter editing. I also was slightly disappointed to not see a lot of Physics content (some basic stuff is being talked about but Nolan should have allocated more time for this and less on politics). It also felt too easy and too fast how the movie went from "the germans discovered something useful" to "let's test our bomb".

Some final (losely connected) remarks: As a reader of "Surely you are joking Mr. Feynman" I appreciate his 1 second screentime as bongo guy. I find it odd that the demon core was not presented in a more terrifying manner, you could make a thriller about that thing alone but I am happy that it was at least shown. Einstein's depiction feels a bit like he is not very interested in what is going on which was not the case at all.

All in all, if Nolan would have decided to focus less on communism and politics and more on Physics and life at Los Alamos, then this movie could have become one of the greatest of all time.
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Asteroid City (2023)
2/10
Worst movie of 2023
30 July 2023
Absolutely terrible. They get all these great actors Scarlett Johansson, Tom Hanks, Bryan Cranston, Steve Carell, Willem Dafoe and Margot Robbie.. and this is the best movie they can come up with? It has no humor, no plot and no tension. All this movie tries to be is "unique", but putting an instagram filter over your recording does not make it interesting. The best summary of the movie is given in the movie itself when the alien actor says that he is not trying to play an alien, " it's supposed to be a metaphor but we don't even know which one. We don't pin it down". Giving us a non-sensical movie and hoping somebody is able to make anything out of it? That's just lazy writing. What exactly is the purpose of this movie? The only positive thing I take away from this disappointment of a movie is seeing Scarlett Johansson naked for about 200 miliseconds.

2/10, don't waste your time with this one.
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7/10
Open to interpretation
1 June 2023
Warning: Spoilers
In this review I will give my personal interpretation and a few thoughts about the film.

First of all, the film was suprisingly scary considering that not that many scary things happen. There just are many POV scenes where the camera slowly moves through dark rooms and around corners with scary music in the background. The film also has an interesting start: Happy dancing with happy music followed by a very scary car driving through the darkness with a terrible accident. I think this is supposed to show the contrasts in Hollywood (expectation vs reality).

At first it seems as though that the brunette has mental issues but then the plot twist comes through: it has been the blonde woman who has mental issues: In the beginning we see what she dreams her life would be as a Hollywood actress (determined to be successful just like her aunt) but at the end of the movie we see that she is a massive failure, a junkie and someone who wants to have her ex girlfriend assassinated out of jealousy.

I think this plot would have been interesting enough and would have resulted in a great plot twist thriller but the director decided to add many more non-sensical elements to the film to keep people guessing what anything means. Many side stories (e.g. The mafia wants a certain actress, why does it have to be a cowboy who puts the director under pressure, why is there a man having the same dream multiple times and then collapsing in real world after encountering the same setting, ...). All of these things I disliked because they add nothing to the movie other than 'mystery' (in the sense of it really is a mystery how anyone can make sense of this).

All in all it should be clear that the director wants to make the point that nothing is as it seems in Hollywood and that many people are lured to LA with false hopes of becoming a movie star but eventually ending up as failures. I liked the overall idea so 7/10 is adequate, but without all the previously mentioned non-sensical elements it could easily have been a 9/10 thriller.
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The Swarm (2023)
5/10
Underwhelming to say the least
11 April 2023
Warning: Spoilers
This show must have the worst dialogues I have ever witnessed (we are talking 'The Room' levels of bad but that movie at least was funny). Just to give an example: They have communicated with the underwater species multiple times, have sent messages back and forth and now one of the scientists goes "We need to tell them this and that" and then another scientist goes ".. but HOW?" and then they think for a while and then finally stare at the other scientist who literally spent the entire episode exchanging messages with the underwater species, as if they just had a brilliant idea xD And this show if full of this low quality dialogues and bad acting. The atmosphere is also terrible because apparently other people do not exist (empty bar, empty company reception, everything empty). I would like to know how low their budget must have been. I am writing this review while watching the final episode which shows how little I care about the ending. 5/10 for actually convincing me to watch until the last episode.
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8/10
Charming movie
28 March 2023
Beautiful aesthetic throughout this film, eloquent dialogue and strong acting performance by Ralph Fiennes! Just looking at the colors in this film feels like watching visual ASMR, combined with a classy cinematic retro style this is just awesome.

What I did not like about this film is the plot itself. It does not seem very interesting to me and I was not finding myself particularly emotionally invested on how it would turn out. I really do think this film is worth watching anyways as it is unique and fun to watch.

All in all I do think this movie would have had even more potential with a more interesting plot. 8/10, would recommend.
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8/10
Underrated!
26 February 2023
Warning: Spoilers
This show is as of today (02-27-23) rated at 6.6 (a bit ironic considering the protagonist is supposed to be the 666 devil). Overall, I enjoyed watching the show. Waltz portrayal of the devil in human form is scary and convincing, you keep wondering what he has planned next. There are, however, a few points of critiscm that I have. First of all, the amputation side-story is never fully explained and it's a bit of a let down that the "addict" woman's entire purpose in this show is to drop the name of another person. Secondly, what does it add to the story that Patoff is made out of gold ? It's pretty clearly implied that he is not human and acts as the devil but why make it even more confusing? It also never is explained why he has problems with the stairs (Is he supposed to be struggling when walking upstairs because he is too heavy because he is made out of gold? Is the show a time loop and he is struggling to walk because he lost a toe?). It probably is best to enjoy watching the show without questioning everything, it is not supposed to be a real-world depiction of consulting work after all. All in all, unique show carried by a strong performance from Waltz.

8/10, would watch again.
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Casino Royale (1967)
5/10
Feaver dream James Bond
22 February 2023
I had no idea that this movie was gonna be a parody when I started watching it. The plot did not make too much sense (as usual) so I did not suspect anything for quite some time. But at some point the movie became too weird and it felt like I was watching Austin Powers, then I concluded that this movie is what we call today a 2 hour sh1tpost :D It has a few funny moments and some interesting ideas that were ahead of its time (e.g. The smartwatch videoconference only would become reality almost 60 years later) or the man who claimed that his gun shoots backwards ("Tenet" 2020) . Overall the movie was not funny considering that it's a comedy but it was very weird. I liked the music and I think this is one of those movies that are so bad that they are enjoyable to watch. Impossible to rate this one, so I settled for 5/10.
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Ad Astra (2019)
6/10
Underwhelming movie without likable characters
9 January 2023
Warning: Spoilers
The main issue with this movie IMO is that there are no likeable characters. The father is a sociopath and murderer, his son is an egoist and murderer and they don't make any interesting discoveries (I guess his father collected some new info about new planets but this is only shown briefly at the end of the movie). So what is the movie even about? It's pretty clear to the viewer (and the US government in the movie) what happened at the protagonists ship early on in the movie. It's a bit boring to watch because nothing really happens and the laws of physics we known seem to not apply in some scenes. All in all, this movie is a waste of time IMO and one of the weakest space movies I have seen.
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The Menu (2022)
8/10
A dish unlike any other!
4 January 2023
What I enjoy most about this film is its uniqueness. It does not feature a plot that you have already seen countless variations of. This film is ridiculous, but special - just like the food being served. Even though the plot description of this film might not sound very interesting, I enjoyed every minute of it and found myself wondering which dish the viewers will be served next.

Great acting from the chef and a nice restaurant atmosphere and aesthetic. This film is full of surprises and while some aspects of the movie are ridiculous on purpose, there is a logical red knot tying everything together.

All in all this certainly is not a film for everyone, but how boring would it be if everyone had the same taste?

8/10.
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6/10
Artificial soap opera
3 January 2023
Let me start this review by saying that I did not like the atmosphere of this movie. Some scenes realy feel "dead" and have a Hoolywood set vibe to them. For instance, some scenes play in empty train stations, empty courthouse corridors or empty streets. In addition to this, this movie has a lot of cheesy soap operaesque scenes which I did not enjoy. All in all, the movie never had a 'realistic' feel to it. The main plot of the movie feels like everything is too easy and happens too quickly. What I liked about the movie was Sean Connery's performance, IMO he played the only convincing and likable character. All in all 6/10, go watch something else instead.
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Breathless (1983)
3/10
Disappointing
31 December 2022
They tried to use the success of the original BREATHLESS movie to their advantage but this remake is not worthy of being shown in theaters in my opinion. The entire movie is disappointingly unrealistic and low effort. Even though it currently has a rating of 5.9/10, I am sure that without the various nude scenes people would have rated it lower than 3/10. I believe sometimes it is better to leave a successful movie as it is and not butcher memories of it with a disappointing remake. I would not recommend anyone to watch this version of BREATHLESS. Instead you should check out the original from the 60s.
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Wednesday (2022– )
7/10
Harry Potter x Stranger Things x Twilight
21 December 2022
The show feels like a gothic sociopath Harry Potter is stuck in Stranger Things. The show is not very scary, but it has a dark atmosphere with a crime main plot. Every now and then there are funny or uplifting moments which makes the show surprisingly fun to watch. I would say the humour is aimed at a younger audience (<18yo) and generally the show seems to be aimed at this audience. I am sure that if I were around 15 years old right now I would love this show and give it a higher rating. The ending for too predictable for me and overall the acting is below average (with the exception of Jenna Ortega who does an excellent job). Overall 7/10 I watched the entire first season but I am not interesting in the second season which inevitably will come out eventually, considering the success of the first one.
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Passengers (I) (2016)
5/10
Gets worse as it continues
18 December 2022
Warning: Spoilers
I really liked the first half hour of the movie, might have rated it 8/10 at that point. But the quality rapidly drops as it turns into a predictable soap opera. They movie could have been much better and deserved a different ending. What were the filmakers thinking when they decided to add the "oh no he is dead" *presses a few buttons* "yay he is still alive" scene?? And really, why let the other guy wake up just so that these two can access a few new areas and then let him die of disease instantly? Such lazy writing. The entire "repairing the ship" ending is confusing, illogical and overly dramatic. IMO the movie should have gone a more unpredictable route: For instance, when she finds out that he woke her up and is about to murder him, she really should have done it! And then maybe let other people wake up of failing pods and have them discover his dead body. Could have been a nice thriller but became a boring soap opera, 5/10.
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Little Women (2022)
6/10
Illogical disappointment
19 October 2022
This show does not make any sense. It felt like I was losing IQ with every minute I watched. There is a weird double plot that basically is the same and the reactions of characters in certain situations are just odd and would never happen like this in real life. With Korean movies and TV shows I sometimes get the feeling that the producers/directors have a checklist that there must be hate, love, anger, sadness and happiness covered for every character in every episode and this is done so blatantly that it makes me want to stop watching. The plot of this show is ridiculous and the drama feels artificial and forced.

6/10 would not recommend.
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Warrior (2011)
5/10
One of the most overrated movies I have seen here
26 August 2022
Warning: Spoilers
Russian world champion gets hyped up the entire movie just to be beat by a scuffed highschool teacher who trained for a few months? And what's up with the drama with him having to win the tournament to not lose his house? He clearly seems to be incredible at this sport so there is no reason why he should ever been broke.

His brother manages to treat their father so badly that dad starts drinking again after being clean for almost 3 years. And the movie just continues like this never happened and dad watches the tournament like he is fine.. Then what was the point of the scene?

Also: Why do the fans look so shocked and surprised when the announcer tells them that both brothers are now in the grand finals? They literally progressed through the brackets slowly and everyone there watched the fights and knew this was coming.

I still don't understand the motivation of his brother to start competing again. Seems so forced just to have some drama with two brothers in the grand final. And his life saver backstory at the army seems like it does not belong in the movie.

Overall such an unrealistic and predictable soap opera that I was happy when the movie finally was over. It blows my mind that this movie is currently rated at 8.2/10, me giving it a 5/10 still feels like I'm being too generous.
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WarGames (1983)
6/10
Bad movie but entertaining!
17 August 2022
Warning: Spoilers
First of all, a lot of the things in this movie don't make any sense (the funniest part is the brute-force guessing where it for some reason knows that a character is part of the solution without knowing the full solution, then it keeps guessing the same values for other characters in a loop xD). But let's not focus this review of this aspect.

Another thing I don't understand is why they had to sexualize the girl even though she has a line where she tells us that she only 17 years old. In one early scene, she sees a ~60 year old man on the computer screen and reacts with "wow he is so good looking"?? And then later we see her in unnecessary sports scenes with weird camera angles where all we see is her feet. Does not add anything to the story and highly inappropriate, you can really tell that this movie is not from the 21st century.

The tech aspects in this movie on the other hand are very interesting and some things are still valid today ("i believe no system is completely secure", nuclear war is a game that can't be won, ethical questions about having machines that can make important decisions that affect human life). Other tech things are interesting because they are NOT valid anymore (the phone thing when using the internet is just fun to see as a throwback, or tricks to use payphones for free etc.).

Overall a 6/10 really not a good movie but much more fun to watch than other movies I rated 6/10.
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Ex Machina (2014)
7/10
Unofficial Black Mirror movie?
13 August 2022
Warning: Spoilers
The movie feels a lot like a Black Mirror movie which is a good thing because I enjoyed that show. What I disliked about Ex Machina was that movies that end like this can lead to fearmongering about the advancement of AI even though humanity will likely profit more from it than it will be harmed by it.

I also felt it was not believable that the hyperproductive CEO who developed all of this alone is an alcoholic. This seems like lazy writing to create a situation where the protagonist can uncover the truth.

IMO the scene where the protagonist slices his veins with a razor blade was unnecessary and the movie should come with a trigger warning. Has he never bled in his life before? Was it really necessary for him to check if he is an AI too?

All in all an interesting movie that could have been better in some aspects. 7/10.
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Hoop Dreams (1994)
7/10
Interesting but a bit tedious
12 August 2022
You get a look into the teenage years of Arthur and William, both young men dreaming to become NBA players one day. Following their lives over many years to make this movie is an interesting concept I enjoyed, but I felt like this movie should be 45min shorter. Especially towards the end it felt tedious at times.

Strong recommendation if you are into basketball or have tried to pursue a competitive sports career in your life!
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Nightcrawler (2014)
7/10
What's the point of this movie?
10 August 2022
Warning: Spoilers
The sociopath protagonist chases crimes through the night to capture them on video and sell them to tv news companies. That does not sound like an exciting story but the movie gets really intense when the protagonist gets caught up in an active chase.

The problem I have with the movie is that the story itself is not interesting and the protagonist obviously is not likable. If you want to see a character study of a sociopath this movie is for you, if you want to have a good time watching a movie this one is not for you.

So what is the point of the movie? I guess the movie can be seen as a critique of a society that is more interested in seeing violent crime scenes on TV than they are in being informed about the truth (e.g. In the movie, the triple homicide turned out to actually be a drug-related crime, not innocent rich and white people getting murdered in their expensive home. But the TV News does not focus on the drug part of the story because they know that their audience is only interested in the high adrenaline car chases and bloody corpses).

All in all an interesting movie with a dark atmosphere, would neither rewatch nor recommend to others though. 7/10.
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7/10
Has its moments!
10 August 2022
There are some very funny scenes in the movie but there also are lots of silly jokes that did not make me laugh. Overall an iconic movie that anyone who likes flat jokes should have seen at least once! 7/10.
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5/10
Illogical & Overrated
8 August 2022
Nothing in this movie makes sense, it starts off alright but goes downhill when the illogical part of the plot starts. Heavily overrated IMHO, don't let the camera switching scenes 3 times per second distract you from the fact that this is not an exciting movie. By the way, do NOT watch this of you are an epileptic..

5/10.
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