ryanmccarthy-87095 Reviews

Bloodsucking Bastards (2015)

100x better the 2nd/3rd time around.

[9/10 · 9 June 2023]

Rewatching it at a later date exponentially elevated my appreciation for this movie. Why? Because I went in without expectations.

Initially, it looked like a college film set with dull cinematography and awkward characters and dialogue. Six weeks later I gave it another chance, and boy I'm glad I did.

There's no denying that Pascal's "massive talent" anchors the story along. And while the script may seem weak, I changed my mind when I gave it another chance.

Pascal takes the typical bloodsucker stereotype, completely flips it upside down, and gives one of my favorite vampire performances. No brooding, no hopeless romance, no dramatic soliloquies about how humans don't deserve the life they have blah blah blah. He's a corporate sales guru high on championing a new innovative business management style: turning everyone into vampires because, apparently, they get the job done without distractions like food and sleep. If you've worked in corporate sales, your managers would maybe even consider his offer.

If you work in corporate business, this movie is for you.

We Can Be Heroes (II) (2020)

Narcos stars reunite!

[8/10 · 29 May 2023]

First of all, let me say this is a movie for kids and fun loving adults. My nieces watched it 2x in a row, and now they want to be super heroes.

If you love Narcos, Peña and Murphy reunite as super hero dads with a bit of angsty chemistry. Their scenes together are reminiscent of the dueling relationship they played in Narcos. And it's hilarious! ...Had to get that get of they way...

For us millennials, it's a modern day Spy Kids, Sky High, USA PUNKS, and specifically a sequel to Sharkboy and Lava Girl.

I generally don't waste my time with modern children shows/movies, but I gave We Can Be Heroes a chance and I'm glad I did.

Barbarian (2022)

If you like throwing up, this is for you

[26 October 2022]

I don't recommend this to anyone. The second half is the grossest thing I've seen since I attempted to watch Human Centipede 2. I'm a horror fanatic and nothing fazes me. Not even the Saw anthology. I've seen plenty of gore films and videos and have attended autopsies. But this took the cake. Yes, I threw up. Not because it's scary, because it's the grossest movie I've ever seen. I was in shock all night and I didn't know how to move until my stomach forced me to.

Shield yourself, shield your children. Shield your loved ones. Shield your gag reflex.

If you want to see it but want to know what I'm talking about, read halfway through the plot on Wikipedia. I sure wish I did.

I'd never want to come across the writer. I'm afraid of what goes on in that brain.

Jericho (2006–2008)

2022... a show more relevant than ever

[10/10 · 21 October 2022]

First things first, THEY HAVE GRAPHIC NOVELS FOR SEASONS 3 and 4!

Second, the show's only fault is that it was created way ahead of its time. CBS oughta consider bringing this back (with Skeet Ulrich and the original cast!) because it's now more relevant than ever. Here we are in 2022, with the highest threat of nuclear war since The Cold War, corrupt corporations hijacking our food and gas supplies, and the world is still recovering from a virus that killed our friends, neighbors, and family. I shudder to think what else this show will get right.

I just watched the series for the first time. As a small town girl from Kansas, I told my friends and family they have to check it out. My sister called my crying, not because of the content, but because the show ended too soon. Though I admit that the content is terrifying because now I'm in LA, and no one in the world needs us like they do middle America... uhem... I bawled my eyes out because there was so much more story to tell. CBS did the viewers some justice by green lighting 7 more episodes and graphic novels for seasons 3 and 4 after they cancelled the show at the end of S1. But the New Civil War had only just begun!

This show teaches you more about how America became a country in the first place. It was the will of small town farmers and country folk who never backed down from the oppressors. "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. It's the only thing that ever has."

This show taught me to never doubt yourself... there's a quiet hero in all of us...

How many shows teach you THAT.

The Astronaut's Wife (1999)

Well designed thriller. See for yourself.

[8/10 · 2 July 2022]

Like several others, I'm flabbergasted at the negative critic and user reviews. It should have earned at least a 6.6.

Johnny Depp charms the audience as the dreamiest husband/NASA astronaut who has returned to earth after a mysterious ordeal labeled one of the most shocking incidents in NASA history. However, we see changes (are we really though?) in his personality unfold through the eyes of Charlize Theron, his unassuming wife. What really happened up there? Did they merely lose oxygen and die and come back to life? Is Charlize out of her mind?

I won't go into more. And word of advice, don't watch the trailer because it gives the mystery away.

Waiting for the Barbarians (2019)

Making a Col Tavington out of Rob Yet

[6/10 · 1 May 2022]

The Patriot's Colonel William Tavington, masterfully played by the charming Jason Isaacs, who is one of those actors rightly typecast as the villain, is arguably one of the most sadistic movie villains of all time. Col Tavington's loyalty is to King George III's British Empire, otherwise known as "The Crown." For those who don't pass his loyalty test, "they deserve to die a traitor's death." And he enjoys this blood sport as much as a child loves ice cream. But when his ego and reputation were threatened, we see a vengeful character unfold that many of us wish we hadn't.

Could Robert Pattinson's Officer Mandel be the young Col Tavington? Rob's performance shows that he should accept the challenge of playing a villain as callous as Tavington in another military period piece. Or a young and insecure Roman Emperor instilling fear and trepidation in anyone lending an ear to his undoing - yes, I'm referring to Commodus in Gladiator. Officer Mandel was only a taste test of Rob's potential for an Oscar-winning antagonist.

Waiting for the Barbarians robbed the audience, and Pattinson, of bearing witness to everything Officer Mandel was capable of. We only had about 20 minutes of screentime with him. The director should be charged with treason against Rob's talent. We had 5 scenes that began to build Officer Mandel's chilling trajectory into a fear to be reckoned with and a rising tolerance for inflicting pain on others. All we got to see was a calm warrant officer in his introduction -and damn that stage presence in his first moment on screen, to 1 minute of a shuddering director of punishment, to a silent record keeper, and to maybe his most exciting scene, a giggling wasted poker player amused by the question "how do you eat after working with people?" "Working" meaning "torture." In the final scene, he announces they're leaving.

Robert Pattinson was wrongfully directed to keep Mandel under a tight restraint, which was painful to watch. After having to force ourselves to stay awake during this movie, we deserved to see more of Officer Mandel and how he handles the situation in his own way. We missed out on his male fragility and his burning aspirations to overcome it. I stand by the critics that if only we had Robert Pattinson throughout the entire film, the story would be more exciting, the pacing would correct itself, and this would probably be a rewatchable movie.

The Batman (2022)

Robert Pattinson IS the Batman. The earlier films are just portrayals.

[10/10 · 4 March 2022]

Marvel shmarvel. This film is a marvel. There is no comparison.

The film is set 2 years after Batman was introduced to Gotham, and what a magnificent choice that was. He's not a playboy, he's not frightened of his calling, he's not tormented by the death of his parents. He lives and breathes the fear he has instilled in Gotham's criminals. Is he in the shadows? What was that noise? We think we've seen this before, but not in this film. The audience is terrified that Batman may be in the shadows. Is this another scene where he smashes in criminals' faces? What are we about to witness??

He's the dark devil in the shadows. You will be debilitated if you pick a fight. You will never be smarter than him, you'll never tear down his confidence, you will never be stronger than him.

He is the greatest detective that Gotham has ever had. That's his job. He takes his job very seriously, and right now, there's a serial killer on the loose. Let's bring in Batman, he's smarter than the rest of us.

If you're looking for an ounce of charm or wit, watch The Dark Knight series. This is no cartoonish betrayal. This is no Dark Knight, no Tim Burton film. It is an action film with passion snd brilliance.

Miss Julie (2014)

A+ Acting

[10/10 · 26 February 2022]

Taking from Roger Ebert for my title.

If you have a keen eye for cinematic masterpieces, Miss Julie is for you. The direction may make you uncomfortable because the transitions are not as smooth as we audience members are used to. At times you feel claustrophobic because 3/4 of the film takes place in the kitchen. But claustrophobia is what all 3 characters are experiencing in this quiet, empty manor in Northern Ireland. Heiress Miss Julie (Jessica Chastain) holds them "hostage" in their cramped servants' wing. Her emotional trauma is searching for an outlet, and to escape the humiliation of a public hysterical meltdown, she constrains the servants (Colin Farrell as Jean and Samantha Morton as Kathleen) from leaving her presence and fulfilling their duties so she can project her crumbling mental state onto them. As Miss Julie learns throughout the film, Jean and Kathleen are tired of "kissing her boot." And as we watch her fall from grace, the emotionally charged performances by Colin and Samantha prove to Miss Julie she's just as damaged as they are.

Out of all the Miss Julie film adaptions, this surpasses them all by miles and miles.

Scream (I) (2022)

SPOILER

[3/10 · 23 January 2022]

You bring the people to Stu Macher's old house. Stu was never shot in the head. You missed a HUGE opportunity. Forums all over the internet wanted it. I was hoping for it, and I was still waiting till the last minute. But it just ended up as the last few. Stop bringing Sydney Prescott into a kitchen with a killer- it's getting old. If it was Stu- imagine that for an ending.

Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)

This is what happens when men run the studio

[9/10 · 11 January 2022]

How many times have we seen women led sequels be destroyed because the Studio men think they "understand" the direction of the series. 1984 had so much going for it. Patty Jenkins had a vision, the Studio boardroom took control because they're visionless, old, out of touch, and will spend hundreds of millions of dollars investing in a great director only to take control and suffer a flop (i.e. Alexander- watch the last cut).

We love you Patty. We hope to see a third one when you have more freedom.

Winter's Tale (2014)

The Lazy Book Report Version

[6/10 · 24 November 2021]

I give the film a 6 because of the incredible performances, and I took 4 off because the studio signed off on this script.

The film leaves out how they fell in love.

In the novel, they spend more time in her home on more than one occasion, they make love the first time they meet. And after they arrived at her father's winter home, they tie up a carriage to their horse so Peter and Beverly can take the kids for rides around the frozen lake. One evening they take them across the lake to a tavern with music and drinks so the kids can dance.

Little Willa falls asleep in Peter's lap on the way home. Beverly's heart melts.

Peter Lake's upbringing in America shouldn't have been passed over. He was raised by a local native tribe in the city, until he was sent out to discover the world on his own, ended up in an orphanage for Irish orphans, and thus he developed an Irish accent.

That's as much as I'll get into. I hope I've provided some context. And shame the studio that wasted all of the great talent with this script.

Cinderella (I) (2021)

Fabulously Fun! (I think some of the bad reviews are fake)

[8/10 · 8 September 2021]

Either the reviews saying this is the worst movie in history are fake, or they're giving it 1-2 stars because they're, to quote Top Gun in context, "abused children."

I am usually a harsh critic of new films, but I found Prime Video's 'Cinderella' starring Camila Cabello and Pierce Brosnan absolutely fun, intelligent, and overall fabulous. Camila has some serious acting chops and better comedic timing than most up and coming "stars." I look forward to her future work.

Those who write reviews that claim the film swims on "woke" waves and feminism give me serious Incel vibes. It's not drowning in wokeism, but to designate it as such clearly shows that there are uneducated people who don't think that a Queen and a Princess didn't want to put up with misogynistic bs- and this film (sadly) attributes only about 120 seconds of the Queen and Princess telling the King he can be kind of a dick. And "Ella" is still after finding the "one."

The soundtrack is a mix of originals and modern pop songs, taking a note from Baz Luhrmann's Moulin Rouge! Props to fitting Seven Nation Army into the royal ball scene. And I have to note the script has a healthy serving of clever and well delivered wit.

Pour a drink and go enjoy yourselves. I would buy tickets to this live on stage in a heartbeat.

Crack: Cocaine, Corruption & Conspiracy (2021)

Informative Reporting, Zero Accountability

[5/10 · 20 March 2021]

The American Government took a blind eye to the crack industry in the early 80s. And once the communities were destroyed, white America paid attention. They didn't pay respects; they paid the judgment. News agencies promoted narratives that the crack community is America's demise. And the crack community was black.

Once that sinks in for the viewer, the documentary's narrative doesn't adjust from blaming the government and media for the crack community's woes. "Former dealers" - as were their captioned titles in the documentary, also black men, boasted about the millions they were raking in during the early 80s' big boom of crack dealing before it was cool. The Former Dealers' interviews were coupled with pictures of their cars and clubs and the grandeur of paying off the cops, bringing to mind the "Goodfellas" scene of young Tommy paying off the friendly cops with cartons of cigarettes in the back alley.

And then the Dealers' screen time was replaced by Activists who took zero time in confronting the other. While the turf wars became deadly, the "biased" news media reported children being gunned down in the neighborhoods and famous black athletes dying of crack overdoses.

Soon enough, the viewer experiences existential symptoms of the crack epidemic that are blatantly placed on anyone other than the crack dealers. Again, if I didn't make it any clearer, all of the dealers are interviewed in such warmth of cinematography that you think it would be silly to hold them accountabile for their actions.

This is a rare example of a Netflix documentary that should have been made into a mini-series. The "anti crack communtiy" deserves the camera, too. To pay due respect for the victims of the crack epidemic's never-ending agony, the addict must explain their accountability for how they lost their way, like the rest of the global addict community.