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Reviews
White Chicks (2004)
Despite its moments, overall White Chicks is a hilarious film from the Wayans Bros!
Just came back from the world premiere of White Chicks here in Westwood. I would have to say that it is one funny, laugh out loud film! Shawn and Marlon Wayans are as funny as ever, undercover as two rich hotel heiresses. The one who steals the show however, is Terry Crews, the muscular tougher-then-he-looks-guy who likes white women. Despite is moments, if you like toilet humor, off the wall jokes (the previews of the film gives you what's in store), and a film that pokes fun at society's perception of people (some jokes are racial, however none are particularly offensive or overblown) then White Chicks, a step above the Wayans' Scary Movie, will give you a funny and hilarious time at the movies. 5/10
Offerings (1989)
A good horror flick!
Offerings is a good horror flick that is worth seeing! The film was put together nicely, and scary too! When you first watch Offerings, you notice that it relates to the Halloween film...right down to the story line and even the music. Even though this film practically ripped off the formula from Halloween (metal case escapes, goes to his hometown, seeks revenge), all-in-all, Offerings is a fun, yet cheesy film filled with cheesy killings.
--If you have friends over while watching this film, make sure your not eating pizza or at least give a quick glance at the toppings.
--Like many slasher films, this one has only one cop dedicated to the case, and he is so nerdy and dumbfounded, it makes it all the more hilarious. A funny scene is when he apprehends a kid from trespassing and the kid says his name is "Ben Dover." It takes the cop 2 minutes to finally realize the punchline. Lines like "What's all this I hear about an ear?" adds to his gumpy character.
--Only thing that was annoying about the film was that the two lead girls always stayed in the house even though body parts were showing up around the house for a few days. It was like they were confined into the house. The ending could have had more explanation too. It even makes you feel sorry for the killer (in a funny sort of way).
--Overall, Offerings is not that bad of a film, it's definetely worth your while.
6/10
Queen of the Damned (2002)
Aaliyah's performance is the only "bright" side to this film
The only reason why I saw Queen of the Damned was because of Aaliyah's role in the film. Having no knowledge on the Ann Rice series, I thought this would be a good film--was I let down.
--By far Aaliyah's presence in the film is what saves QotD from becoming much worse. She is very beautiful, and truly stands out in the film with her "vampire ways."
--I was rather disappointed that it took nearly 45mins. just to see Aaliyah as Queen Akasha and the limited screen time thereafter. Yet the scenes she was in were truly captivating and I'm glad she choose a versatile role.
--I'm not commenting on the rest of the film because there's no need. Aaliyah is the best part in Queen of the Damned and she is ONE IN A MILLION!
The One (2001)
Fast-paced film that will satisfy "true" action fans
The One is one kick ass movie!! The master himself, Jet Li, makes the film excellent to watch. The action scenes were executed perfectly, and after every one, I couldn't wait to see the next! My particular favorite is when Jet Li fights himself at the end. Every shot was amazing. Cory Yuen's choreography was sheer brilliance.
I don't understand why there are so many negative reviews about this film. Overall, The One will please any action and martial arts fan.(Or anyone wanting to have a great time). Even though the story is light at times, the action/fight scenes, the highlights of this film, will make you anxious to see more. It was even better than that other film it is always compared to, because it has more adrenaline pumping scenes and stars one of the greatest martial artists of all-time, Jet Li.
Overall, if you are a fan of Jet Li, the genre, and like a fast-pumping film, then The One is for you. If not, your missing out on a lot of things. A Solid 10.
Running Brave (1983)
An inspirational story of an American running legend
Running Brave is a wonderful film. It sends out strong, positive, messages of life, and pursuing goals. As a Cross-Country and Track runner, Running Brave gave me the inspiration to continue to work hard and focus to be the best out there (like the Prefontaine movies did). Billy Mills did not let the stereotypical attitude towards his origins bring him down, it just fuelled him even more to showcase his talents.
The last segment of the 10,000 meter final is filmed exceptionally well.
--If your a runner, then Running Brave is for you. If your a person that likes inspirational, good-hearted films, I highly recommend this movie. *** stars out of 4
Death Screams (1982)
Contains the most ridiculous death scene in slasher history
--Death Screams, or House of Death as it is known here, is one of the most absurd horror films I've seen next to Drive-In Massacre. I had friends over while watching this movie, but afterwards I think they considered me their worst enemy after putting them through this trash.
--The first 40 mins. are so boring, I felt like ejecting the tape. Nothing happens, just some stupid dialogue at a carnival scene. The agony of sitting through this is too great. The most annoying character in this film is the grandma, she should have been the first victim. The true "suspense" starts in the last 10 mins. literally. Before that, just some cheesy killings.
--House of Death has the most funniest death scene that is the only "plus" side to this movie
** IF you get pierced in the shoulder with an arrow, go and scream for help. Surprisingly this girl with an IQ of 1 just moans and groans, falls down (you know the rest). She ventures onto an abandoned carousal and surprisingly, it starts moving. If a plastic bag is then put over your head, and your hands are free, poke a hole so you can breathe (or take it off). This one just groans until she is suffocated, yet never attempts to save herself. Someone that stupid just made me laugh so hard. I know most characters in horror flicks don't think... but c'mon!
--I do not even know who the killer was, it was revealed, but House of Death has more holes than a fish net I was confused. Do me a favor...avoid this one. Do something more productive than wasting your time.