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Reviews
Blood Ranch (2006)
Complete waste of time
I'm writing this review mostly with the intention of warning you not to waste any of your time with this, since the rating for it appears to be inexplicably high (5.1!?). I was attracted by this DVD cover, which is pretty cool and very promising, but unfortenately it just didn't deliver. For the record, I'm a horror fan and fond of trash movies too. That is, the good ones. When the budget is very, very low, you've gotta compensate that with something. Could be lots of well crafted but still cheap gore effects, nudity, believable violence, a clever script, unbelievable sickness... something! Blood Ranch doesn't. All the situations and dialogs are both cliché and fake. Everything in the movie is a rip-off from something else, only worsened. The only rape scene is ridiculously fake and chicks won't even show their breasts, which is the opposite that the cover from the DVD implies. Forget about this one, rent Cabin Fever or anything else instead.
Mozart and the Whale (2005)
What was that syndrome, again?
This movie really sucked. I've read in another post that it hasn't been released nearly anywhere. So why punish us Brazilians? What did we do to deserve it? Well, judging by the unbelievable 7.1 rating and the overall good critics that I've encountered here, I assume that the distributors may know what they're doing. Shame, shame. As for the movie, I'm no psychiatrist myself, but the disturb portrayed in the picture wasn't a recognizable one, nor did it presented any identifiable pattern, apart from the always exaggerated notion that individuals with autism are good with numbers, which isn't exactly it (they do tend to like repeating patterns, though). I thought Josh Hartnett and Radha Mitchell both did a terrible job and weren't by any means convincing. Not satisfied with her character already being rather annoying, Radha decided to reinforce this with a somewhat abrupt laugh that was just hateful, to say the least. I don't think that it was the writer's choice to make the female interest hateful. And if the movie doesn't succeed in that matter, it didn't succeed as a romance as well. It was just a hideous chain of clichés, revolving around the well known structure of this kind of movie: characters fall in love they're great together male messes up female gets pis*ed they break up male successfully tries to win her heart back they live happily ever after. Only that this time this sequence is repeated 3 times throughout the movie. And, of course, it isn't even an original idea. It has been done before, more than once. Horrible. If you're a reasonable person, my advice is to stay away from it (as far as possible).
Tammy and the T-Rex (1994)
Excellent Trash Movie
I bought this film merely because of Denise Richards, who I think is one of the most beautiful actresses in Hollywood. I was deceived by the title and the picture, both of which made me think it was a movie for children. Boy, was I wrong. This is a Trash movie, what made me glad that I bought it. Now I can place it among the other titles of my B-Movies collection. Is this a bad movie? Of course it is. Surprisingly as it may be for most people, it was made that way ON PURPOSE. And, what may sound even more surprising is that some people (such as myself) really do appreciate this genre of film. Trash, B-movie, whatever you call it, are based in 4 concepts: Hot chick (Denise Richards couldn't be more appropriate), bad acting, cheesy special effects and a ridiculous script. This movie succeeds in all of them.
Thus, considering the logic of those who are into Trash movies, this one deserves an 8 or 9 out of 10. For the rest of you, who just can't get what is to enjoy in a truly bad movie, I guess it would be 1 out of 10, considering a conventional rating system.