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9/10
Excellent! (for an action movie)
22 September 2006
I get DVDs and give the ones worth seeing to my father. That's exactly what I wrote on the Post-It attached to this one: "Excellent! (for an action movie)". This is what action movies should be all about. This is what James Bond movies used to be all about. Well, to be perfectly honest, I'd rather have a really good James Bond over a really good Mission Impossible, but since they don't even do reasonably good James Bond movies any more, I'm happy to embrace the MI franchise instead.

The movie is packed with action. But it's reasonably believable. It's packed with suspense. But not in an obviously artificial, silly way as recent action movies tend to. Technical terms are relatively frequent. But the explanations are either reasonable or not needed, as opposed to the confusing mumbo-jumbo we had to get used to lately.

But the most prominent feature which actually makes this James Bond-like is the touristic quality of the movie. James Bond movies were arguably the first mainstream, widely recognizable movies which featured several exotic locations per movie for the single purpose of enhancing the movie viewers' experience. Of course, the "real" James Bond movies added an extra touch of refinement which the MI series doesn't even attempt to touch. But the reality is that the "real" James Bond movies are really, really tacky by today's standards, in an Austin Powers sort of way. Really.

So, unless the James Bond franchise owners make a serious effort to update Bond's character while also keeping his British charm (which they obviously haven't over the last decade), we'll have to settle with the MI series as "the thing". And, to be honest, that would only be marginally disappointing in the greater scheme of things, if they keep their standards at the level of MI:3.

9/10 only because I still hope for James Bond to be resurrected--10/10 otherwise.

(I rate movies per genre; one can't compare this to The Godfather, or The Lord of the Rings, or The Matrix, or Schindler's List in any reasonable fashion, in my opinion.)
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8/10
The...
7 April 2006
... quintessential pre-pop outrageous pop art rock opera freak show comedic hall of weirdos with a pumped-up 70s fragrance and sexual innuendo slide-show of parodic impossible-to-predict sci-fi implausible kind of impossibly over the top horror-meets-fantasy in a grotesquely but quite voluntary way of ridiculous and out-of-worldly piece of contemporary art-hinting quasy-minimalist semi-theatrical interpretation of an intentionally petty pulp-like quite erotic and kaleidoscopic, surprisingly accurate in trend prediction movie.

Quite remarkable.

{Note to editors (this should be removed from the posted comment): I'm aware I'm risking my free account with this post, and I could've easily refrained from posting it at all; I do however feel the "review" above is appropriately styled for The Rocky Horror Picture Show. And yes, I also typically hate such "original" adjective lists. But this is no typical movie. Please just dump my review if you don't think it's a good idea after all. Regardless of your decision, thank you for reading this!}
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2/10
Absolutely ridiculous
10 January 2006
No, Asian Kill Bill, no, you most definitely didn't get it! The point about gratuitous violence is that you make fun of it, one way or another. Gratuitous violence with a straight face just doesn't go. And please, pretty please, don't insult our intelligence with the hero's ability to perform any kind of physical tasks after that kind of beating, as long as you don't have anything on offer in return.

It has been said that the movie excels in clarity and lack of twists. It does that -- plenty of that, even. But why would anyone want to see it then? Is a movie not supposed to be a challenge of some sort, between the movie makers and the movie viewers? The review form for this movie shouldn't include the "Contains spoiler" check-box: there are no possible spoilers, since there's no surprise whatsoever... Could this ever be a good thing to say about any movie?!

Brief review: plain stupid, waste of excellent film a lot of students would have used a lot better, and a shameful waste of my time, based on the current, outrageously over-estimated IMDb rating (7.3)
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9/10
Beautifully crafted, outrageously over the top, excellent -- 9/10
29 November 2004
Warning: Spoilers
Conceptual spoilers within, not revealing the plot.

Apart from several clichés which were obviously planted on purpose for the fun of it, and apart from the beautiful post-production, what I loved most in this movie was the extremely well calibrated outrageousness progress throughout the timeline. It all starts completely credible (yes, they actually tried landing zeppelins there, it's a historical fact), and gradually builds up in such a smooth manner that you find yourself many times a couple of full seconds behind at catching anachronisms and outrageously over the top stuff.

I'll repeat what many have said before me: the story is not an intricate plot at all, this is basically an adventure movie, with a twist. And since that's obviously what they intended when they made the movie, that's what you should expect and appreciate, and that's why it gets a 9/10 from me.
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People I Know (2002)
4/10
Why see it?
12 September 2003
I can find no good argument for seeing this movie. Pacino's ok, but the script lacks... well, everything, no surprises, no turns, no emotions, no nothing. I think they hoped for the whole thing to stick together around the "atmosphere" of the movie, but that didn't do it either. Pity.
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The Pianist (2002)
7/10
A perfect engine with no spark
5 March 2003
One of the best done movies in a while - directing, playing, images, everything looked just right. I failed to get excited about this movie however, and on occasion I actually got bored while watching it.

Everything's so old news that I don't understand how anybody can compare this movie to Schindler's List, not to mention Life Is Beautiful, which was truly a masterpiece if only for the fresh perspective.

Obviously just my two cents, but I expected a lot more from this movie.
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