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Crimson Peak (2015)
Mediocre and forgettable
I expected much more from Guillermo del Toro, after some great dark movies in his career ("The Devil's Backbone", "Pan's Labyrinth") he went to become Hollywood mainstream and his work is downgrading massively with childish blockbusters like "Pacific Rim" and now this.
If I have to point something positive about "Crimson Peak" that's the visuals, the locations, cinematography, costumes - all these were done fine. But that's ruined by a stereotypical, cheap Hollywood screenplay. The dialogue and character motivations were laughable and put there only to connect the nonexistent "twists", which can be seen by everyone who've seen more than 5 movies of the genre. At some parts of the film there were some attempts of "poetic verses" or something, which sounded so bad as the cameraman wrote them in his lunch break. The actors are not really to blame here, they did what they can with with this mediocre script.
If you value your time don't waste it with this movie. Wasikowska and Hiddleston's previous Gothic film "Only Lovers Left Alive" although not perfect is far more meaningful than this. Watch it instead or just rent some of the 1970s giallo films, which "Crimson Peak" miserably tries to imitate.
The Human Centipede III (Final Sequence) (2015)
The best prison movie since "The Shawshank Redemption".
Director Tom Six returns to end his groundbreaking trilogy "The Human Centipede". Many people will think that, just like "The Godfather", after raising the bar so high with the first two installments, he won't succeed with the third, these people are wrong. Six proofs himself as a master writer with this one, he comes with the surprising and clever idea of increasing the people in the centipede. The film benefits greatly by its fantastic cast, especially Dieter Laser who shines in a low-key, smooth performance as the prison warden, his acting is skillfully supported by the eternal Eric Roberts (despite his busy schedule being in 40 movies this year according to IMDb, all good) and Laurence R. Harvey (not to be confused with the less classier Laurence Harvey from "The Manchurian Candidate").
This Oscar-bait story follows the sensitive and kind prison warden Bill Boss (awesome name), who tries to improve the conditions of his inmates and at the same time help his politician boss win the next elections for the wellbeing of the community. Sadly his good intentions and compassion remain misunderstood by his neo-nazi, "Allahu Akbar" screaming inmates and he is forced to use (for their own good) some perfectly legal methods of keeping them calm like mass castration, boil-water water boarding or breaking a guy's arm (twice). When this doesn't seem to work, he and his accountant decide to sew "mouth to anus" all the inmates in a giant centipede (didn't see that coming). Contrary to the popular belief all this is achieved through an intelligently written dialog, suitable for the whole family.
The next scene - a heartbreaking dream sequence in which Mr. Boss is captured by the inmates and he recites Pacino-like Shakespearean monologue, unfortunately misunderstood again he suffers sexual intercourse in his stomach. What fallows is the best "breaking the fourth wall" scene I've ever seen - the director Tom Six enters the movie and talks with the characters how cool his movies are. After he and the doctor talk about how the operation is 100% medically accurate, the doc gives a brilliant line I'll remember for a long time: "Well, the feces wouldn't be contaminated by outside bacteria, because it would be going from one digestive track to another. So it wouldn't be harmful. But there wouldn't be much nutritional value." Then some gore medical treatment until the last 20min when the centipede is finally revealed and Eric Roberts (reminding everybody why he is an Oscar-nominated actor) declares:
"This is exactly what America needs".