Big_River Reviews

Sharknado (2013 TV Movie)

So Terrible It's Funny

[1/10 · 13 November 2013]

First of all, this movie is so BAD, It is impossible to take it seriously. It's so completely unrealistic, cheesy and full of plot holes, It's hilarious! Had me laughing from start to finish.

It poses a question as to why this film was even made? It was like it was written by a child with an overactive imagination. And I think that's what it was. A director fulfilling his teenage fantasy.

If I was going rate this as a serious movie, I'd give it 1. But for sheer cheese value, I'd give it a 10 because although it is awful, it's very entertaining.

I do think this movie is worth the experience and I'm happy to recommend it.

The Purge (I) (2013)

A Good, Solid Movie!

[6/10 · 8 November 2013]

I've heard mixed reviews about this movie, but to satisfy my own curiosity, I decided to give it a whirl for myself. And I'm pleased to say that it didn't disappoint.

Now the very best thing about it, is its originality! No concept like legal anarchy for one night of the year has ever been done before. Not like a lot of modern-day movies who are guilty of stealing ideas from older ones. It's completely original and I love that!

The movie takes you in from the beginning. Scenes of previous "purges" grabbing your attention. Makes you wonder if that footage was taken from real-life events. If they were made for the movie, they did a pretty good job at making them look real. So then you put yourself in Ethan Hawke's position. Asking yourself questions like "how would I protect my house if there was a purge in real life?", "How would I protect my family?" and "How long could we hold on for?". Now the positives of Ethan Hawke's (and his family's) situation, is that he's got a pretty decent sized house with lots of rooms and potential hiding spaces. Of course this is good because it makes it more interesting for the movie. Had he lived in an apartment, the movie wouldn't have lasted very long. So then the chaos unfolds. The intensity constantly rising, keeping me hooked. I'm not wanting to give away too much now because I don't want to spoil it for those who haven't seen it yet.

Could they have made this movie better? Of course they could! The whole movie was basically centered around one main family, one house and their neighbors. The concept is an excellent one for a thriller, and I do think they missed an opportunity by just spending the entire movie about how it affected just one family, and not lots of other ones. But nevertheless, it is a good, solid original movie. The acting was brilliant. Especially the acting of the younger actors.

Six out of ten.

Flight (I) (2012)

Zzzzzzzzz

[3/10 · 7 February 2013]

What a disappointment this movie turned out to be. Viewing the trailer, I had high expectations. With Denzel Washington in front of the camera and Robert Zemeckis behind of it, I thought that "Flight" looked to be one of the most promising movies of today. "There's no way that this can be a bad movie", I thought. Well, unfortunately, it turned out to be a bad movie.

The first half- hour was fantastic! A very memorable opening scene followed by intense action. At this point, "Flight" was living up to my high expectations. All of a sudden, it plummets, literally. The action stops and the movie turns into one of the most long-winded movies of all-time. The runtime is just over two hours but it feels like four, it was that boring. I kept faith that it would pick up again at any minute but it just didn't.

I'm still a fan of Denzel Washington and I'm going to continue watching his movies in the future. But I won't watch "Flight" again, that's for sure. I'd like to give it more than three stars for the rating but I just can't because it doesn't deserve it.

ATM (I) (2012)

Terrible

[20 January 2013]

In all seriousness, I think that this is one of the worst movies that I've ever watched in my entire life.

Three terrible actors get trapped at an ATM by the least intimidating movie villain of all-time. That's pretty much it! Absolutely shocking! I turned it off before the hour mark, it was that bad. It was boring, predictable and not the least bit scary. Even Spongebob is more frightening than this pathetic excuse for a horror movie.

Would I recommend it? No way. Don't waste your money and don't waste your time. You ain't going to see anything original in this movie.

Rating out of ten? I'll give it -2

House at the End of the Street (2012)

Better than I expected

[6/10 · 17 January 2013]

I was a little bit skeptical about watching this movie and I came very close to not watching it. But, because I had a spare couple of hours with nothing better to do, I decided to give it a whirl.

A lot of modern-day horror movies are made on a budget. The typical tell-tale signs which give them away is the use of poorly lit sets, very few filming locations and a very small cast of young and unknown actors. They like to follow the path of "The Blair Witch Project" and rely on heavy breathing to create the suspense. A pretty young lady starts to breathe heavily in the dark, something jumps out and gets her, right? Nowadays, this has become the norm and this is what we come to expect.

Well, I'm pleased to say that "House at the End of the Street" is different and unique in its own right. Why? Because its actually got a storyline and it keeps you thinking! Just when you think you've figured it all out there's another clever twist that comes along and makes you think "Gee, why didn't I think of that". This is a movie which is always one step ahead of you! Also, the actors in this movie actually act. Don't get me wrong, it's not on the same page as an Alfred Hitchcock movie, but it is, nonetheless, very refreshing.

"House at the End of the Street" turned out to be a little gem. I'm glad that I rented it.

Looper (2012)

Average Movie

[5/10 · 10 January 2013]

It looks awesome in the trailer, doesn't it? Well, I'm afraid to say that it wasn't that awesome, unfortunately.

"Looper", in a nutshell, is an adult version of "Back to the Future". Except in this movie, there's no Marty McFly and no great quotes that particularly stand out. Instead, we have the not so lovable, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, who spends most of the movie trying to imitate Bruce Willis's facial expressions in order to make us, the audience, believe that he's the younger version of Bruce Willis. It wasn't convincing.

Bruce Willis wasn't that great, either. This movie is far from his best! If you're expecting to see a character like John McClane, you're going to be disappointed. In fact, the character he plays in this movie is nothing short of complete scumbag. You'll see why when you watch it.

Overall, it isn't a bad movie. The action is quite good and there's plenty of twists which keep it interesting. The script isn't exactly the best written script of all-time and the plot, at times, can be quite confusing. You're likely to encounter a lot of moments that will make you go "huh?".

Five out of ten.

Glengarry Glen Ross (1992)

Profanity, profanity, profanity.

[5/10 · 12 September 2012]

This is a movie about a group of salesman that are competing against one another and it's a dog eat dog, survival of the fittest kind of affair.

This movie boasts a star studded cast that includes Al Pacino, Alec Baldwin, Jack Lemmon and Kevin Spacey. Unfortunately, all of them are under par in this movie and it's nobody's strongest performance by a long stretch. I think that it's the lack of quality in the script that lets them down. The profanity is relentless! It contains every cuss word under the sun and it just spoils it. A great cast like that deserves a lot better.

Overall, it's a decent portrayal of what life is like for a real life sales team and their pressures to succeed.

I did enjoy this movie and it does have some great quotes. It's just a shame about the constant profanities and I did find that to be very distracting.

The Football Factory (2004)

A very British movie.

[5/10 · 11 September 2012]

Firstly, this is NOT a movie about soccer! This is a movie about a group of hooligans and the struggle of a young man who is growing up and trying to change his ways.

"The Football Factory" is a very British Movie and it might be quite difficult for an American audience to relate too.This movie shows the darker side of Britain which an American may not be accustomed to. Don't expect the clean cut British stereotypes with their posh, silver spoon accents because there's no "Pip Pip, cheerio chap" in this script. It contains Cockney slang, dark British humor and profanities throughout.

The quality of the acting is very high! Danny Dyer's portrayal of the odd man out is very convincing and the brutal character played by Frank Harper is terrifying Many of his scenes are very graphic and I could literally feel the tension coming into my living room.

Although it might not be the directors intention...this movie IS guilty of glamorizing violence and gang culture.

The Expendables (2010)

Predictable.

[6/10 · 7 September 2012]

A typical action movie that checks all of the action movie boxes. Lots of explosions, shootings, killings and unrealistic fight scenes.

It's great to see all of the dinosaurs from the 80's team up with each other. Stallone looked convincing as the main guy but it's the youth of Jason Statham that delivers the adrenalin in this movie. I would've liked to have seen more from Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger. Their roles were far too short for the amount of action experience they have. Steve Austin is the only person that was miscast. Personally, I think that this movie would have been better without him.

I got what I expected and if you like action movies...you will definitely like "The Expendables".