solvason-pastuch Reviews

Chicken Run: Dawn of the Nugget (2023)

OK But Not Great

[6/10 · 23 December 2023]

Like others, I was so looking forward to this movie. The original Chicken Run was exactly that, original. This iteration seemed off.

The voices were good, not exactly as in the first movie but close enough to satisfy.

The animation was everything you expected, absolutely first rate.

Molly and Frizzle were first rate, especially Frizzle. And Molly, well, a young Ginger off in search of trouble.

Dr. Fry, here things went down hill. Don't know if he was supposed to be a genius, idiot, henpecked but just came off as very annoying.

Mrs. Tweedy, well, a villainous first rate.

A fun watch but to be honest, a movie that won't bear watching watching , unlike the original.

Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019)

One more American disaster of a movie

[4/10 · 30 May 2023]

What Tom Cruise did for War of the Worlds, they have now managed to do for Godzilla.

A bunch of TV actors playing movie.

The mom who know everything :I will save the world" At least the daughter isn't whiny.

How did Ken Watanabe ever gets roped into this one.

Mr Silicon Valley.

Fight, implausible science, oxygen weapon.

Just a plain bad movie all around.

A bunch of TV actors playing movie.

The mom who know everything :I will save the world" At least the daughter isn't whiny.

How did Ken Watanabe ever gets roped into this one.

Mr Silicon Valley.

Fight, implausible science, oxygen weapon.

Just a plain bad movie all around.

Peter Pan & Wendy (2023)

Boring, full of who-cares characters

[2/10 · 29 April 2023]

I couldn't put my finger on the problem but others articulated what I thought. Boring, dull, no heart. Peter came across as a spoiled little kid, which I guess he was, right to the end where he refuses to grow up. His acting was mehh and a lot of his lines were hard to understand. Wendy -OK- but another one that doesn't want to grow up. The child actors were child actors, ranging from good to poor, with lines you couldn't understand. Tink, well for a non-speaking role, quite all right. I like Jude Law but this was just not the role for him. Not mean, not a pitiable character, sort of yah, well. Smee, yes, he occupied space. 30 minutes in, I was "advised" to find the copy of Hook but unfortunately it was on VHS and long gone. Another very predictable Disney failure.

Shelved (2023– )

Commercials Are So Bad I Won't Even Watch It

[2/10 · 20 April 2023]

The title about says it all.

The one character in the commercial making the "library" joke, har, har

The old guy going on about snap talk.

All I had to see was 5 seconds of either ad and it smelled cheap, Toronto content. And I was not wrong.,

The one character in the commercial making the "library" joke, har, har

The old guy going on about snap talk.

All I had to see was 5 seconds of either ad and it smelled cheap, Toronto content. And I was not wrong.,

Not sure why other people get of with short reviews?

The one character in the commercial making the "library" joke, har, har

The old guy going on about snap talk.

All I had to see was 5 seconds of either ad and it smelled cheap, Toronto content. And I was not wrong.,

The Passion of the Christ (2004)

Gratuitous Violence

[4/10 · 7 April 2022]

This is gratuitous violence, nothing more and nothing less. Mind numbing, who really gives a care violence. If anything, it reminds one of a 1970s snuff movie. Did we really have to flog and flog and flog? Is that really what is in the Bible, I don't think so."Wanting to satisfy the crowd, Pilate released Barabbas to them. He had Jesus flogged, and handed him over to be crucified." Nowhere does it say they flogged him until his skin came off. No, this is a grabge movie. 4 stars for the cinematography, -6 stars for the rest.

The Matrix Resurrections (I) (2021)

Not Quite Awful But Just Plain Bad

[2/10 · 24 January 2022]

That was like watching one of those sci-fi movies cobbled together from pieces of other movies. It was totally soulless and devoid of any feeling for any character. Neo - who cares. Trinity - who cares Morpheus - who cares. Other characters, who??? And some of the CGI was terrible. This is the kind of movie that kills any idea of another.

Don't Look Up (2021)

Very Scary Political Satire

[9/10 · 28 December 2021]

I'll start off by saying I don't know why anyone would call this a comedy. That it is not IMHO.

What it is a very scary, plausible movie with a situation that could well happen. A slightly deranged President (think ex-president), who is more concerned with business and poll numbers, and who believes their fake data rather than science. Couple that with a Foxish "news" program and a know- it-all scientist (think Space) and you have something that is too close to home.

The acting was superb, DeCaprio as a befiddled scientist. Lawrence as the overeager assistant. Chalamet doing a much better job than the whiny, rich kid in Dune.

All in all, a very accurate portrayal of what could easily happen.

140 trillion dollars, lot that got you !!

Dune (2021)

Really, we really needed this toss up

[2/10 · 24 December 2021]

Let's see, scene 1, mommykins reminding junior that he can't use his Inuit throat singing against the water pitcher but has to use it against her. After 21 years he can't remember. Oh wait, it's for the audience who doesn't know why he is throat singing.

They can travel from planet to planet in a blink of a blue eye but have to travel around in oversized dragon flies.

Flying thingy can't attach its fourth cable but they can travel from ........

Company A and company B fighting over a gold mine in Columbia. Oops, other narrative.

Daddy dies - who cares

House maid dies - who cares

Trees die - who cares

Paul, who can hardly act, comes across as a whiny rich kid.

Basically a steampunk movie with lots and lots of CGI.

1 star for the desert, sans CGI stuff.

1 star for the music

Waif for it to come out on Netflix !!!

The Core (2003)

A Disaster Movie or a Disaster of a Movie

[3/10 · 14 October 2021]

A bad movie can be good if it crosses that mysterious line. This turkey didn't.

The entire premise is bad.

We hitch up.our nuclear train and head down to where the temp. Is 9,000.

Along the way, we encounterr a cavity (think Journey to the Center of the Earth) where it is nice and balmy.

You could predict how the crew would croak one by one and at the end, the nerd and his girl are left alive.

The scene I loved the most was trying to get the door open. Reconnect the wires. I loved the tangle of wires ending up on an electronic plug in breadboard.

Oh, and then have enough trouble sending a signal down to a mine 1km deep but 9,000km is no sweat.

Need the lasers to drill down but no problem coming back up.

On and on. A turkey you want to watch once, with a large glass of wine or a few beer and then totally forget about it.

Mission to Mars (2000)

It's a Movie, NOT a Documentary

[8/10 · 13 October 2021]

It's a movie, not a documentary.

Why do people have so much trouble just sitting back and watching a fun space opera. The wire work was great. We got to see the "Face On Mars". The alian was enough to bring tears to your eyes.

Lighten up, enjoy for enjoyment sake.

The Ice Road (2021)

A typical Liam saves the world bit of entertainment

[8/10 · 25 September 2021]

This is not high class cinema.

The CGI is really bad in places.

But coming from that part of the world, Winnipeg, ice roads are real. They are sometimes the only way to get goods into remote communities. They are dangerous.

I have heard stories of my grandfather driving from Gimli to Victoria Beach in the winter, over the ice.

Go with the flow people. You want a documentary on trucks, watch a documentary on trucks. You want the "real" deal, watch a scripted reality show.

Edge of the Knife (2018)

A Powerful Film

[9/10 · 8 April 2021]

A powerful film, with a meaningful story set against an incredible landscape. An example of what madness could look like.

Anyone who rates this a 1 or a 2 just does not get the film on any level. This is not an action film, a sci fi film or a horror film. It is about ancient Haida lore.

To appreciate the movie, learn about the culture. Go visit the people. We did and the film now seems very "normal".

The Day the Earth Stopped (2008 Video)

Exactly What One Expects

[8/10 · 1 February 2021]

I would first start out by saying that anyone who sees any resemblance between this and The Day The Earth Stood Still has had too many Doritos.

This is a typical film from this bunch, on par with War Of The Worlds. This is a classic 1950s grade B sci Fi movie with all the cheesy effects, poor plot and poor acting. Watched with that in mind it is quite an enjoyable movie. If you don't enjoy a good giant ant movie from the 50s, don't bother watching this.

I enjoyed C. Thomas Howell doing his usual.

The men in black in their black SUVs.

But my favourite had to have been Sinead McCafferty, who I don't think could act her way out of a Marcel Marceau not-box.

A good romp, worth the watch once.

Joker (I) (2019)

Why, Why Did I Try And Watch This Again

[4/10 · 5 June 2020]

45 minutes the first night, red wine. 45 minutes the second night, no wine. Why did I waste my time. Sorry but this is crap.

Colossus: The Forbin Project (1970)

Was was predicted is almost here

[9/10 · 15 May 2020]

I find it tiresome, the reviewers who compare a movie made in 1970 with the latest Star Wars.

This was the best technology there was, I know, I was there and I punched cards/tapes and stood by the line printer waiting for my Fortran program to run. There were no fancy screens and i9 processors.

Let me see, I can going to build a fully protected computer, guarded against attack and then put an on/off switch on the wall. Ummm, sorry, but not the idea.

Stephen Hawking said in an interview "The development of full artificial intelligence could spell the end of the human race." So is the premise that far out of line.

Come on people, look at the movie at the time it was made, the world we were living in and the reality of missiles and the cold war. Enjoy it for what it is, not what a remake, God help us, would look like in 2020.

Mortal Engines (2018)

Save Yourself

[2/10 · 6 February 2020]

There are some movies that after 30 minutes you begin to wonder why you are watching. Some only take 15 minutes. This turkey only takes the opening few scenes. Run, hide, save yourself.

1917 (2019)

Visit The Site, Then Comment

[9/10 · 4 February 2020]

A lot of reviewers are comparing it to Saving Private Ryan. It is not that, nor was it intended to be that.

All I can say is that having visited the sites of the battle, and walked through acres of white headstones, the movie affected me more than just a bang-bang shoot them up war movie. The shell craters are still there, sheep graze rather than mowers as there are still buried shells, they still turn up grisly reminders when they til the fields.

Visit, then watch it again and I guarantee you will not have the same opinion.

The Way (I) (2010)

Encouraged us to walk

[9/10 · 10 June 2019]

The movie is what made us decide to walk the Camino, then the Dingle Way, then Portugal, then Japan, etc. It is, by far, a much better depiction of the Camino than many documentaries. Watch, enjoy, but be warned, the walking bug will bite you.

Street Legal (2019)

Typical Canadian - BAD

[3/10 · 7 March 2019]

Cynthia tries to be tough, she's not. She tries to be sexy, she's not. The story line is terrible. It has all the production values of King Of Kensington, or any other 1960s CBC production. I wish you well but I gave up after 20 minutes.

True Detective (2014– )

True Mumble Mumble Detective What ????

[5/10 · 11 February 2019]

Seasons 1 and 2, brilliant, season 3, should be called True, stop, rewind, play, what, Detective. Between the bouncing back and forth, and the mumbling, half the time I don't know what is going on. Don't care who took her, where she went, what happened to her, etc. Better luck in season 4.

Ready Player One (2018)

Waste of time if you're not a gamer

[2/10 · 31 December 2018]

A wet dream for a 16 year old gamer. A waste of time for the rest of the real world.

The Girl on the Train (2016)

Watch Something Else, Anything Else

[2/10 · 4 February 2017]

This is what happens when you turn a ten minute short into a "full length" movie. The plot was so obvious, it hurt. The editing, was, well, interesting in a negative sort of way. Jumping back and forth in time could only have been improved upon by hand held shots, with the camera bouncing around. My son rented this and I wish he could get his money back. I found myself disappearing every ten minutes and when I came back, I knew exactly what was going on. It was like watching a soap. I only give this a 2 because it was in colour and had sound. Don't bother. And people say the book is better, I won't waste my time there either.

Chappie (2015)

Depends on what you are looking for

[31 March 2015]

Chappie is not Terminator, robot out to get the world, bang, bang, special effects left, right and centre.

Chappie has a plot, character development, a being you can actually feel for. It shows the problem mankind (sorry, person-kind) will have when AI become aware. It's much like District 9, it shows us a problem that we will have to deal with.

If you want a movie that will make you think, and shed a few tears, see Chappie. Otherwise, save your money and watch Avengers or play Bloodborne.

Much is made of Die Antwoord as a negative factor in the film. If anything, I thought that Yolandi was a very touching mother figure, think Chappie in the bed being read to.

And Ninja starting out being all bad ass, and then showing his love for Yolandi and coming around to the good.

All in all, a movie I would, and will, see again.

Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey (2014)

Lacks Genuine Feeling

[7/10 · 3 April 2014]

I would have to say it is a very well done science program, but it doesn't hold a candle to the original. Listening to Carl Sagan these many years later can still cause chills to run up and down your spine. He was able to kindle a spirit of wonder, which is likely why I, like many others, went into the sciences.

Tyson just states the facts, and tries to act amazed. He plays the part well but the genuine wonder just isn't there, just facts and computer generated animation. At times, this wonder almost surfaces, then it is gone again.

A good try. I suppose it had to be done as the original science was now outdated. Like wine, this one needs time to age. But in the end, it will never become a great wine.