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Bird Box (2018)
This, this is a horror story? No way I say.
Excited about the media hype my wife and I went to a friend's house to watch this. I love Sandra Bullock but her role in this movie was was beyond annoying. We kept waiting for the scary parts but instead we were forced to endure something that was actually kind of boring. I know most people will disagree but that's ok. I like my movies to deliver what was promised. This one totally disappointed.
Pirates of Ghost Island (2007)
Horror or comedy? You decide.
Sometimes a movie comes along that makes you sit there and go 'wow!' This is one of them. I can only imagine that this movie was made on a bet. No one, and I mean no one involved in the making of this movie will ever list it in their resume. Frankly I'm surprised that those involved haven't attempted to hack into the IMDb database to remove their name(s). Maybe they have tried, I don't know. It's a tossup whether to call this movie a horror flick or a comedy. To call it a comedy excuses much of the acting and special effects (esp. gratuitous amounts of candy apple red blood splashed all over people). These scenes evoke a lot of laughter so I guess it was meant to be a comedy. In one scene for example some babe in a bathing suit is attacked by some tree branches which calls for the candy apple red blood dousing. In another scene a fearsome(?) pirate unsuccessfully tries to scale a cliff and rockets past the viewer downward as if he were shot out of a cannon. Repeated DVD player playbacks of this scene alone justify the movie being considered a comedy. I can go on about it but I think you get the idea. Would I watch it again? No, I think there are worse movies out there that are much better to watch. If you know what I mean.
Urban Justice (2007)
The new terminator
By the time you are reading this short review you must have read others which detail the storyline so I won't rehash it. As a longtime fan of his I want to make a few comments about it. I think this is one of Seagal's best. As others have said many of us were becoming worried that his abilities were diminishing, especially since Exit Wounds. It seemed his production company began to allow too much control of his work to overseas influences. I don't mean this in a bad way at all but I think what Urban Justice brings the basic Seagal proved formula back to us. With delight we see unsuspecting fools approach the big guy threatening to cause him harm but we know like he knows that some old time butt kicking and bone snapping is about to come their way. This occurs throughout the movie and each time it happens you want to raise your fist and shout 'Yes!'. The obligatory gun battle is saved for the end like in most of his movies. But interestingly there seems to be a little more Seagal butt kicking mixed in too besides just the shoot out. There are no instances of voice dubbing that occurred in the past couple Seagal movies thankfully. He assumes the role of a terminator in this movie and that suits me just fine. 9/10 oh yeah.
Dead Man's Hand (2007)
Yep, a beginners horror flick
Someone earlier mentioned that this movie was like an introduction to horror flicks. That pretty much says it I think. To those of us who really enjoy a solid, memorable horror flick this one is a vast disappointment. I fell asleep twice while watching it and had to rewind back to see what I missed. It didn't matter to the continuity though. Some suggestive sex but nothing really bad. Sid Haig is excellent as usual. I think he is the most underused horror actor around who can really be pretty menacing when he's on his game. The special effects involving the apparitions are so bad it really bothers me to think about them. I think I've seen some better homemade ones on Youtube truthfully. If you like crappy movies you should see this one. You won't be disappointed.
Power Corps. (2004)
Bad? Let me count the ways.
Words really fail me in describing how awful this movie is. I used a free coupon to rent it so my pain was reduced somewhat. Some of the acting was OK but the scenery, props etc. looked like they were from some home movie made by a group of high schoolers. There was a single brief scene involving a cool battle type droid but you could only see it from a distance and it lasted about five seconds. It probably was lifted from another movie and superimposed in the scene I guess. One of the soldiers wears a custom visor over his helmet which totally obstructs his side and top vision. Like a horse with visors on he could only see what was directly in front of him. How this guy could be a hardened marine and not die within the first minute of combat is beside me. Rent this movie for someone you don't like.