uksaiyan5 Reviews

Space Truckers (1996)

Bad film, but funny to laugh at

[25 June 2004]

With a film like this, it's hard to know exactly what you're meant to be watching. Judging form the filmographies of both the director and the writer (the only good film previously done by either of them being the directorial work of the Christopher Lambert film Fortress), it's clear these aren't exactly cinematic geniuses; so I took the film as I saw it... laughably bad.

From the very start we are greeted with laughably bad special effects with blatantly visible wires used to spin a man in supposed zero g environment, and then animation on par with that from "who framed roger rabbit?" as a cartoon tooth and blood unrealistically originates from a persons face.

The inclusion of Stephen Dorph, who's only achievement in life is the Blade movies, just adds to the weakness of this movie. As for Dennis Hopper, lets just say he has more to be proud of in his role in Waterworld.

Basically this space trucker has to take a mysterious cargo, is hijacked by pirates and eventually gets to earth for a weak conclusion. Despite a ship that is made out of space waring metal burning up and exploding in the earths atmosphere, we are somehow expected to believe that Dennis Hoppers character was able to parachute from the same height wearing only a spacesuit.

In fact the one good thing in this film is the switcheroo pulled on the bad guy in the end, but I won't spoil it. I'd recommend you watch this film if it comes on TV and you've got noting else to do, purely because it is so laughably bad it makes a fun way to pass an hour and a half of your life. But under no circumstance, even think of parting with your hard earned money to rent this movie, it doesn't deserve your money. And as long as people keep renting bad movies like this, they'll keep being made, so do the movie industry a favour and just say no... unless it comes on TV that is.

Battle Royale II (2003)

Don't expect BR1, and you'll come out smiling

[15 May 2004]

As with most people who know anything about films, or just those with a sick and morbid sense of humour, I loved the original Battle Royale. It is my favourite film of all time, and I expect will be till the day I die. Never before had such an obscure concept on paper, transfer into such cinematic gold. So, as you can imagine, if you go in expecting the same of BR2 then you're going to be disappointed.

The first thing to note when seeing BR2, is don't get your hopes up. Good sequels are often looked down upon merely because they pale in comparison to the original. That said, BR2 is a good film, but it's not the original Battle Royale, and don't expect as much. What made the original great was 3 things: Originality, an intense amount of dark humoured violence, and Beat 'Kitano' Tekashi. BR2 has none of these (well a little Beat Tekashi).

What first strikes you odd about BR2 is exactly what they were thinking for the replacement they hired for Beat Kitano. Personally I'd have a preferred a "we cloned him so here he is" storyline line just so they could recast the master that is Beat Tekashi, than the low grade actor they got for this film. Whereas Kitano managed to pull off the role effortlessly with a sense of depression and casual disregard for life which excellently portrayed what his character was going through, the Kitano replacement left little to no explanation to what he was doing there. What adds to the confusion is when we find out he is there against his will, and we are left hints that he might have been one of the first BR survivors (yet nothing is fully revealed, nor ever will be). Although it is hard for any man to fill Tekashi's shoes, this person just does an awful job, and towards the end I just got confused to what his motivation and purpose was in the film.

What has also gone in this sequel, is the dark humour present in the random and senseless killings. Instead, this has been replaced with a very involved and heavy storyline, which makes the deaths much less enjoyable to watch (although there are still a few whoppers in there). What annoyed me most about this film however, was the extremeness of the anti American and pro terrorist underlying plot. Being from the UK it is all to refreshing to see a movie in which America is finally made to answer for it's injustices to the majority of the world, and a message which communicates that not all terrorists are evil and that many are just fighting for a cause the only way they know how...but BR2 took it too far even for me. Americans tend to hold the belief that all terrorists are evil, while BR2 holds the belief that all terrorists are freedom fighters, if you look somewhere in the middle then you'll find the truth in the way the world works.

Unfortunately, the deaths in this film are almost entirely from being shot at long distance, and hence removes the entertainment of the numerous different types of killings that was present in the first film. Following on from a film where a decapitated head had a grenade stuffed in it's mouth and was thrown through a window...I was expecting a little more gratuity than we are given. Towards the end of the film one is left feeling that they sacrificed everything that BR was about, in favour of making a heavily political anti American film.

Don't go into this movie expecting the lighthearted nature of the first film, this sequel is very much darker and deeper. And if you can get past the lameness of the Kitano replacement, the fact that Kawada and Korijima aren't in it, and can overlook the blatant anti American underlying tone, then you'll at least find this film entertaining. I would give this film 7/10, and would recommend you at least watch it. Just keep in mind that it's not as good as BR1, and nothing ever will be, and you may yet walk out the cinema with a smile.