chrisalsop1213 Reviews

Unknown (I) (2011)

Pretty damn subpar for a 30 million dollar movie

[14 March 2011]

First off, what a brutal title. I mean c'mon. There's at least 5 other films prior to this that have already used it... what happened to at least trying to be original? I went in to this movie kinda stoked because I really dug Neeson's last film Taken. But within the first 5 mins I knew this film was already in trouble. First off, both Neeson's character and the cab driver forget to take Neeson's briefcase off the luggage dolly. Really????!!! So beyond obvious but whatever, I'll go with it. Then as Neeson races back to retrieve it, he can't get a cell phone signal while trying to call his wife??????!!!!!! He's in the middle of Berlin for Christ sake!!!! He's not on some backwoods road or out in the middle of nowhere. C'MON!!!! Throughout the movie, things like this continue to happen. The acting is so rigid. Neeson ain't that great and the chick playing his wife is horrible. The action is few and far between and the actual story is frustrating to watch. Everything was so subpar. The only decent part of the film was the young girl who helps out Neeson. She actually kicks way more ass than he does. He's actually pretty useless. There is also an unintentionally hilarious scene where Neeson and the guy who has assumed his identity rattle off identical sentences simultaneously. The theater was laughing while poor Liam was trying to be serious. I just paid $11 for this crap. Was it the worst movie I've ever seen? No. but considering it's a film with a 30 million dollar budget... then it could be up there.

PVC-1 (2007)

Great piece of filmmaking - but frustrating to watch

[7/10 · 11 March 2011]

Just saw PVC-1 on a recommendation from a friend and although I had never heard of it, I was seriously intrigued at not only the premise of the film but of course the fact that the movie plays out in a single take. As a camera operator it's an idea that I've always loved so I was very excited to check out this film. The film succeeds on many levels and at times is a gripping piece of work. Excellent camera work, very well shot, genius subtle changes in exposure and well thought out camera movements to help convey the emotions of certain scenes. The acting was also solid except for a few over the top moments. Remember though, this is essentially like theatre with the actors pouring their hearts out for almost an hour and a half. Very well done! However, I found myself becoming frustrated with the film at various points, ranging from the actions of some of the characters, to the inexplicable absence of certain tools (yes i realize this is Columbia but a scalpel will work better than a dinner knife and a car engine will surely generate more heat than a candle), to the lack of rational thinking. I was also upset at the lack of explanation as to why the woman had a bomb placed around her neck. I'm assuming this is a common act - but for what purpose. To what end? Sometimes the lack of motive works amazing but not in this case. And finally, while I applaud the film on its realism, I found there were just too many times where nothing was happening to advance the story and or bring you in to the story. The ending was spelled out but props to the quality of the movie because it still got me. PVC-1 is a great piece of filmmaking, no question. But while other reviewers rave about the movie's impact, I was left feeling somewhat let down. I feel that the filmmakers became too caught up in the whole "single take" thing and forgot to really work on adding more special pieces/elements to the story. For sure check it out. I'm looking forward to Mr. Spiros next film.

I Am Number Four (2011)

totally fun popcorn movie

[8/10 · 1 March 2011]

Hey, we all know that this movie isn't going to win any awards for groundbreaking performances, directing, story etc. (Although the special effects were pretty damn cool!) So with that being said, no one should walk into this movie with any other intention other than to be entertained (and if you do, then maybe you're not qualified to watch movies). And this movie does that pretty damn well. The story is pretty cool (understand it's adapted from a book series) and it had just enough depth to keep the viewer rooted in the movie. It delves into the whole surviving life as a teen thing but not to the point that movies like twilight do (which beats you over the head with it). It's not the focus, the focus is more about being an outsider. pretty simple but that's all you really need. There aren't any real dull moments. Even the romantic scenes aren't too drawn out and they never linger too long. The acting is solid all around. The villain is particularly unique and is played quite well. There are also some genuinely funny scenes. But it's the action scenes where this movie really comes out swinging. Really wicked special effects, coupled with tight editing (almost too tight) and just overall killer action. I found myself smiling and just plain out having fun throughout the entire movie. Maybe I was just in the mood for it. I don't know. But I really dug it. And I usually hate movies like this because of there flat out mediocrity. Now I don't plan on going out and buying this on DVD nor am i going to rave about how amazing and groundbreaking this movie is... but I am number four is a solid entertaining movie that I would for sure check out at a theater or on a lazy afternoon. Lots of fun!!

Anaconda (1997)

Not a terrible movie... and Jon Voight steals the show

[7/10 · 28 December 2008]

Now we all know that Anaconda is a total B-movie with some bad effects and hilarious dialogue. But overall, this flic ain't that bad. The acting is solid and there are some genuinely decent action scenes. Lopez is pretty hot, Ice Cube is Ice Cube (acts the same in every single movie) and Jon Voight plays his character so over the top that he's awesome. His accent is a riot and all of his lines are just so ridiculous that it's great. I know people think why the hell is he in a movie of this calibre but you can tell that he's having an absolute blast playing this character. Considering that this was made in 1997 (cgi still pretty new) and on a limited budget, I think the filmmakers did a pretty good job of putting together a decent action/horror flic. It's supposed to be funny and over the top too, so it ain't a bad thing if you laugh at it. That's the sign of a good B-movie.

Hellboy II: The Golden Army (2008)

Awesome effects but that's all Hellboy 2 can conjure up. Too bad

[5/10 · 11 November 2008]

The previews for Hellboy 2 looked incredible. Too bad the movie was beyond brutal. First off, give credit where credit is due: The effects were amazing as was the cinematography and of course the overall conception of the movie. Lots of cool characters and worlds. Visually stunning. BUT great effects etc. does not a movie make. The story could not have been more boring. An endless array of pointless dialog trying desperately to advance the story. They should have focused on making sure the action/fight scenes were a cut above, not average. It was a shame to watch these terrible action sequences take place amidst such breathtaking sets. It was like half the crew showed up and the other half just kinda coasted through the production. The acting was OK but why wasn't Hellboy himself more entertaining. he's supposed to be this loudmouth, smart ass, tough talking, take no s**t tough guy. Instead he was just kinda normal with no real edge. Not Pearlman's fault as the dialog was awful. It looks like Del Torro was too concerned with the visual aspects of the film (which he plays a massive part in) and forgot that he was also responsible for actually DIRECTING the film. As a result, the film severely lacks focus and trips over itself constantly. I know tons of people love Del Torro and this franchise but Hellboy 2 is a poor movie. It is however a stunning visual experience. Maybe if Del Torro decides to hand off the directing reigns and stick to what he clearly enjoys more (conceptualizing the movie) then if there's a third installment, the results might be different.

Rambo (2008)

Pure action!! Solid Movie.

[9/10 · 25 January 2008]

Rambo is without question a sick action movie and Stallone has proved himself again as an intense actor and as a solid director. This installment combines elements from all three previous movies but this one had a much more realistic feel. Yes some dialog is questionable and there are a few, albeit brief, scenes that don't quite work, but make no mistake, this movie takes no prisoners. Stallone slips back into the role with ease and his supporting players do an admirable job. Critics will whine as they always do about the excessive violence, gore and lack of story. (Stick to giving awful movies like The Skeleton Key thumbs up guys). The ironic thing is that Rambo actually gives a vivid and some would say accurate portrayal of war. It has a similar feel to Black Hawk Down and borrows its chaotic action. Rambo pulls no punches...It's brutality, violence and gore are rooted in reality. Gone is the "fun" action of 2 and 3. It is replaced with realism which amounts to some of the best and most intense action sequences I've ever seen. My only real gripe with the film was scenes that were sped up in post. (No big deal)

Finally, the integrity of the series as a whole has been kept in tact. Everything from the music, to the action to the character to the final scene. An extremely well crafted movie. Rambo/action fans will not be disappointed...And neither will the critics who rave about The Princess Diaries

Predator 2 (1990)

Totally worthy sequel

[8/10 · 11 January 2008]

Packed with an insane amount of violence, carnage, voodoo and a shaman like drug-lord, Predator 2 is a totally worthy sequel that remains faithful to the original and expands on it. The opening scene is beyond amazing...so over the top. Endless killing and chaos. The predator played by the late great Kevin Peter Hall, is perfect. Unlike in the new AVP movies, the predator stalks and kills people the way he ought to. There are a ton of wicked death scenes in the movie. Very inventive with a whole array of new weapons.Solid story, cool quotes, decent acting (except for Bill Paxton) and tons and tons of action! This movie is a load of fun. If it wasn't for Paxton trying to revise his role in Aliens (and failing), I would have given this movie a 9. If you love the take no prisoners attitude of the bye gone era of real action flics, then you'll love Pedator 2 guaranteed.

Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2007)

What a waste of film...beyond brutal

[2/10 · 2 January 2008]

AVPR is exactly that...a waste of good 35mm film. Directed by the Strauss bros. (Who the hell are the Strauss bros you ask? Directors of commercials and are self acclaimed SFX wizards. Not inspiring but at least they ain't Paul Anderson...back to him later) Now there are a bunch of reviews here claiming this to be a solid installment in the beloved Predator/Alien franchises. What the hell is wrong with you people??!!!! The story regarding the humans is beyond complicated for no damn reason. Note to the producers...NOBODY CARES ABOUT THE HUMANS!!!!!! So why then are there like 10 different story lines going on while the pretty solid story of the predators and aliens plays out? No idea. One reviewer here couldn't stop talking about all the gore and deaths etc and how it was rated R. ARE YOU JOKING??!! Lets count how many times the film cuts away instead of showing the death or how many times we see blood running down the window and or wall instead of some solid effects. Answer: TOO MANY!!! Was the cinematographer on crack or does he like not being able to see what's happening in a scene cuz it's too dark. And what's with this garbage trend of filming the entire fight scene super close-up??? Pssst, it means either your choreography and/or FX suck and that yer director(s) doesn't know what they're doing. I'm tired of asking the question "Where the hell are these two characters in relation to each other?" I want to know who is killing who. I don't want to see a barrage of close up action with music video editing. And by the way...talk about boring. The action is so few and far between and when there is action it's just brutal. Now lets clear something up. I love the predator. I could watch him do whatever cool stuff he does all day. But for Christ sake, why doesn't he kick ass? He's a supreme hunter!!! Yet for some reason, he can't sense an alien 6 inches to his left? CMON!! He should be dominating! and he should be invisible. I know, we want to see him but work it out...this is your job. Now we all know Paul Anderson is also an awful director and ruined the first movie. But the sad thing is that the first movie had more redeeming qualities than this waste. Better fight scenes, better story (I always liked the idea/story of the first one). Requiem has a few cool deaths and a couple of decent scenes and there's definitely production value but that ain't worth the price of admission or even a rental. Now don't think I'm some guy who doesn't dig these kind of movies, cuz I do and I don't want you to waste yer time with this one or fork over your money. Instead go rent the originals or even some classic B-movies like I come In Peace or From Beyond. Don't agree with me? Fair enough. I didn't like The 6th Day either.

The Pen and the Sword (2007)

A thoughtfully paced sci-fi sleeper

[7/10 · 16 September 2007]

T.P.A.T.S is a thoughtfully paced film that borrows heavily from Ray Bradburry's Fahreheit 451 yet is able to stand on its' own. The film is at times difficult to follow in terms of logic but this also lends nicely to its' overall feel which is that of uncertainty. The uneven storytelling almost seems deliberate and makes for some excellent scenes/shots. As with his other films, Larouche incorporates plenty of great shots - the slow ominous dollies are classic Larouche but this time they are accompanied by some solid hand-held work which lend a sense of urgency to the scenes. The filmmakers also turn several locations into masterful "set pieces". Check out the airport (by far the best scene of the film) which truly looks like a "checkpoint" in an apocalyptic type future and the creepy library which could be mistaken for a scene from a Dario Argento flic. The only real low point of the film is the acting. The characters Fain and Blue are played very uneven. They lack credibility/presence. But because the story, music and style of the film are so strong, the acting can be overlooked. Larouche has constructed a solid short which is stripped down of special effects etc. and tells a story about a bleak future. The mention of Fahrenheit is sure to come up but T.P.A.T.S can definitely stand on its own. 7.5/10

Underworld: Evolution (2006)

A truly sensational action/horror

[9/10 · 19 February 2006]

Underworld:Evolution is without question one of the top action horror movies in the past five years. Tons of amazing action sequences shot by a director who understands the genre and how to make them look good. There are no crazy close-ups with music video editing which exist in so many other films purely to cover up how weak the fight choreography and special effects are. Not in Evolution. They are shot so professionally and executed seamlessly. There is tons of gore and over the top followed by even more over the top death and destruction! And the great thing is that the story (no matter how unbelievable) is actually quite enthralling. Lots of back story in terms of the history of werewolves and vampires and how they came to exist etc. etc. Kate Beckinsale could be the hottest chick in Hollywood. Solid acting, great special effects, superb cinematography (check out the lighting in several scenes) and extremely precise and well timed editing. This movie by far surpasses the original. Sure there are some continuity problems but big deal. A must for horror and action fans alike. AND THOSE OF YOU WHO THOUGHT THAT KATE BECKINSALE SPINNING AND SHOOTING THROUGH THE FLOOR IN THE ORIGINAL WAS COOL, CHECK OUT "NEMESIS" WHICH UNDERWORLD RIPPED OFF AND YOU'LL SEE SOMETHING MUCH MUCH COOLER!!

The Skeleton Key (2005)

Nothing but a waste of film.

[2/10 · 3 September 2005]

The Skeleton Key was nothing but a waste of good 35mm film and the fact that it hasn't received more scathing reviews is troubling. The movie is billed as a horror/thriller as is all the hype these days but simply amounts to an unintentional comedy. When I saw the movie, the audience spent more time laughing than it did being scared, and rightfully so. Watching Kate Hudson try to sell the movie (especially the entire end scene) was hysterical. I love Kate Hudson but she just doesn't work in this movie. But it's not entirely her fault. The direction is terrible as her character becomes more irritating throughout the movie. She is beyond beyond beyond inquisitive, to the point where you want her to shut-up and stop asking so many ridiculous questions.

The problem is that the movie tries to be dead as hell serious and legit, but so much of it is just beyond unbelievable. This film just takes itself too seriously and can't back it up the way The Serpent and The Rainbow did.

The Skeleton key chose to sit on the fence so as to attract as many viewers as possible. It's not scary, intense, slick, dramatic (The Village), well written, well acted ,well shot. The only thing worth noting is the lighting/cinematography. The night scenes and scenes in the attic were great. Don't give this movie your money, there are tons of movies more deserving.

2 rights

Pandora's Paradox (2004)

Weird to the Lynch degree

[7/10 · 14 August 2005]

Despite the fact that I worked as DP/Camera Op on the film, it was still quite a shock to see the end result and the end result is definitely weird. Although the story may not appear to make a whole lot of sense, Matt always seemed to have a very detailed vision of what he wanted to put down on film. So even though many of the images may seem random, everything from the toe to the lighting was very thought out.

When I step back and watch the film as a whole (and not focus on the lighting or camera movements) there are things I like and dislike.

Once you get past the overall absurdity of the film, you can actually link the images to real life and use them as a kind of metaphor. From there, a story does begin to emerge albeit shaded in the bizarre. (But it's an experimental horror movie so cmon!)

The acting is great. A little over the top and sometimes forced (which should be expected) but very solid. Esp. the little kid who I'm sure many of you would be surprised to learn had never acted prior to this film.

Matt'direction is energized and loaded with style. He trusts his actors and knows when to let them steal the scene and not the camera, SFX etc. Even lighting. At the same time there is somewhat of a lack of focus in the films' presentation(directing, editing). Come end time, the film is far too long and could have benefited from having at least 7 minutes axed.

The sound for me was the biggest problem. It was too amateurish and hokey and didn't match the overall dark yet slick feel of the film. The no lip sync was OK, but the random and poorly dubbed sound effects coupled with the tacky Mario Bros. music became a distraction. Oh well.

The lighting of course was great but the direction for a lot of it came from Matt's weird head. I boned up on some Itallian horror to help with getting the feel right, making sure I could translate what Matt had on paper onto film.

Overall, Pandora's Paradox is a solid yet bizarre film combining Lynch and Argento with Matt's own twisted ideas. Whether or not you enjoy the movie (and a lot of people will not)I feel that you can't deny the production value of the film coupled with the fact that at the very least it's crazzzzy eye candy.

2rights

Kate's New Job (2004)

solid flic - tough finding an audience

[7/10 · 16 April 2005]

Kate's new job may not be the most exciting or suspense filled film (infact I wouldn't even call it a horror movie) but for the viewer that takes the time to really watch the story unfold, the result is worth it. The performances are stellar and the directing crisp and focused. Since this is a dialogue driven movie it would've been easy to shoot the typical master and cut back and fourth between static over the shoulder shots. Instead, Larouche opts to use a variety of movement shots which adds a very stylistic edge to the film. (The great dolly that opens the film, the subtle camera movement during Kate's and Carl's dialogue scene). The editing is also tight.

The theme of the film is also interesting in the comments it makes on the modern day work place (draw from it what you will).

All in all Kate's New Job is a very well done short flic with excellent production value that may have trouble finding an audience.

Dark Intent (2003)

Director Reflection

[8/10 · 9 April 2005]

The idea for Dark Intent was to compact a feature length horror flic into a 5 min. short and eliminate anything that dragged. Whether or not that was accomplished I suppose is up to the viewer but looking back I still feel that it's a tightly woven flic (albeit not that original) that contains many elements of movies that I love and hopefully other horror fans will pick up on.

Despite being fairly happy with the final result, there are things that if I could, I would change in a heartbeat. The kitchen scene is painful and there are a few shots I'd love another crack at. But what can ya do?

Anyway, I hope that anyone who sees it enjoys it and if not then feel free to tear it apart. Just give me something I can use.

And why an '8'? c'mon, it's my movie.

Raise The Flag

Chris (director)