seamovieman Reviews

Modern Family: Five Minutes (2017) Season 8, Episode 18

One of the Best Episodes of this Show

[9/10 · 29 May 2021]

This episode completely pauses the fast-paced cutting that "Modern Family" is so well known for, and instead just holds the scene in each situation. It is an absolute joy to behold.

It allows us to see how really brilliant the writing is on this show. Without the quick cuts, w Really get to see how exceptionally talented all the performers really are.

I found the interaction between Jay and Gloria to be especially moving. Their story was simultaneously realistic, uncomfortable and beautiful. I never knew that Sofia Vergara had such acting chops.

Though not a change I would want to see on a regular basis, but it was a nice respite from the hectic pace and a welcome one-time change.

Great episode, Highest ETM Recommendation for fans of the show.

Irresistible (I) (2020)

Subtle as a Sledgehammer

[3/10 · 16 March 2021]

Absurd and ridiculous premise. Yet, It is great on almost every level. Great actors, directing, photography, music, everything - except the script. Even the dialogue is good, but the premise is so ridiculous, it should be an embarrassment to anyone working on it.

Somehow, the makers of this film think they are pointing out that people from the Midwest are "actually smart" (!). Here's a newsflash for the folks who never lived in the Midwest: many of them are smart!

The film is condescending, disrespectful, and insulting to anyone who lives in between the coasts, in spite of what the filmmakers' twist (and even more absurd and unrealistic) ending wants you to think.

The only joke in this film is the plot. I give it Three Stars for production values only. Don't waste your time.

Watchmen (2019)

Watchmen in Name Only

[3/10 · 20 December 2019]

You could have just set this up as its own fictional universe; you'd have the same result. It's not very interesting and the Adrian Veight character is absurd.

Three stars only because Don Johnson surprised me with the intensity of his performance, and because the art direction and music are superb. The rest of it stinks.

Beyond the Valley of the Dolls (1970)

I Guess I Missed the Point

[1/10 · 20 June 2019]

People are going crazy on here talking about how cool and awesome this ten-star, great piece of kitsch is. It's a piece alright, but something that rhymes not with kitsch, but rather with kit.

Roger Ebert is a brilliant writer and film reviewer, and I like large breasted women near as much as Russ Meyer, but if this is meant to be an example of their best, then I sure missed the point.

It's not bad enough to be a film so bad that the Mystery Science Theater 3000 guys could rip into it, and it's definitely not self-aware the way "Black Dynamite" is; it's just bad, period.

I've heard about this film for 40 years. Boobs and drama! Hardly. I didn't see any naked women any longer than 3 seconds at a time. Hell, you can see more than that on any cable tv show. And that's not because it was a different time. There were plenty of movies with nudity in the late 60's/early 70's!

The only thing this movie has going for it is Cynthia Meyers, who is a Playboy Playmate, and turns out to be just as comfortable on screen as she was posing naked for a still frame picture.

Even technically, the film is bad. Strange shots that would be creative if they connected to the rest of the scene, unbelievably hacky editing, and sound mixing that will make you jump out of your seat.

I guess it's a good capture of the Los Angeles swinging singles drug scene of the early 70's (?), but there's a half-dozen films made st the same time that do a way better job of capturing it.

If you dig, dig it. But if you don't, it's not you, trust me. You're just like me, because I sure as hell didn't get it.

Law & Order: Aftershock (1996) Season 6, Episode 23

Absolute Best Episode of Entire Series

[10/10 · 11 April 2019]

This episode is a great reward to any fan who has watched the show since Season 3. It is completely different than any other episode in many ways - and winds up being the best. It really is the apex of the show; the series never gets better than this season and this one episode.

The show usually follows the formula of a crime committed, catching the criminal and then prosecution of the criminal. We rarely see even a glimpse of the lead characters' lives.

But instead, this episode has no crime. Rather, it gives us a detailed and insightful look into the lives of each of the four leads.

In the story, the prosecutors and detectives attend the execution of a criminal they have convicted. Seeing it does not sit well with any of the four.

The remainder of the show details both how they deal with their feelings, most of them acting out in ways antithetical to their usual strengths. One character does not act out, but sticking to the lens of life proscribed in "Law & Order," this character is not rewarded - far from it.

Daria: Dye! Dye! My Darling (2000) Season 4, Episode 13

An Absolutely Beautiful Episode

[9/10 · 19 September 2018]

For a show that started out as a smart-ass teenager making cynical comments about the world around her, this show by Season 4 has evolved into the highest form of comedy and drama. Just an absolutely beautiful episode, John Hughes would be proud.

Station 19 (2018–2024)

Accurate Portrayal. Nope.

[3/10 · 12 August 2018]

The show is an accurate portrayal of firefighters, relationships, human dialogue, and especially Seattle. As a long time resident of Seattle, I can vouch that everyone here looks and acts just like people from Hollywood. Nope. None of this is true. It gets 3 stars for cinematography and location scouting in Seattle. That's it! It stinks!

UnREAL (2015–2018)

Four Stars For Production Only

[5/10 · 25 July 2018]

I gave it four stars because the great production values. A big zero for the rest. What started out as a fascinating look behind the scenes of a reality show eventually turns into a bad soap opera featuring absolutely despicable people.

Why am I supposed to watch this if I cannot stand anyone on the show? Your guess is as good as mine - probably better, since I have no idea what the appeal is here.

This show is just flat-out absurdity, dreck, and based on the star ratings, the future of television.

And thus did the "Golden Age of Television" begin it's decline into mediocrity.

Lost in Space (2018–2021)

It Stinks

[2/10 · 23 April 2018]

Molly Parker is a great actor. The show has a fantastic look. 2 Stars for that. That's all the stars it gets. None of the characters are likeable. The science makes no sense. It stinks. A Solid ETM Don't bother unless you want to see something that looks good non-recommendation.

How to Get the Guy (2006– )

Right Program, Wrong Network

[7/10 · 11 January 2007]

I really liked this show, it was an interesting look at the world of dating without being absurd, sleazy, insincere or pretentious (e.g "The Bachelor" - ugh). It was nicely paced, with a focus on what people do right as well as what they do wrong (and showing how the "wrongs" can be changed and improved). The lessons being learned by the women could apply to the opposite gender as well.

The hosts of the show were warm, convivial, helpful and intelligent. I am still curious to know what the end results were.

(I am unclear about the previous comments about the show being reality or not. It was VERY clear to me that this was not rehearsed or some kind of fictional device. The show had interviews with each woman looking for a date (four women in all) throughout the show; the interviews were no doubt partially scripted and rehearsed, but the filming in-between interviews was obviously unrehearsed (and interesting). Not sure where the mix-up of reality TV definition comes from).

The network didn't give this one enough time, and that is simply a shame. Good program, if only here and gone in a heartbeat. Best wishes to all involved, good work, too bad the world moves too fast for quality shows to be appreciated. I guess you have to show people talking about sex, flashing their breasts or actually engaging in sexual acts to get anyone's attention anymore.

Nothing to Lose (1997)

Quite Possibly One of the Funniest Movies Ever

[10/10 · 1 April 2006]

I have seen this film several times now. I cannot stop laughing at everything I laughed at the first time that I saw it at the theatre. I had no idea what to expect at that viewing, other than the fact that I enjoyed Tim Robbins' work in the past and thought that Martin Lawrence was very funny. This did not prepare me for the life-changing event it was.

I once showed this movie to a then-girlfriend who was no fan of the comedy genre, and thus it was a big risk to even attempt viewing an unknown comedy to begin with. But sure enough, she turned to me when it was over and declared it to be one of the most intelligent yet gut-level funny films she had ever seen.

And without a doubt, she had summed it up best right there.

The Independent (2000)

Incredibly Sublime and Hilarious

[9/10 · 13 February 2006]

This film is hilarious, sublime and simply outstanding - a great example of how a very funny film can be made on a low budget. The adventures of Jerry Stiller's character, Morty, are recorded in this "Mocumentary" with nothing but the absolute best of results. Jerry is in almost every frame and he carries the film in a Herculean effort. Getting less respect than Rodney Dangerfield could have ever described, Morty carries on in his own deluded yet unwavering way. Just watching Morty's morning routine was worth the price of the ticket alone. The previous reviewer compared this to a lame SNL sketch - my advice is to watch it again-sober-and watch for the nuances of Stiller's performance (including the unbelievable deadpan reaction he gives to hearing a brutal criticism of his work) instead of the in-your-face gross-out "humor" that passes for amusement in the mainstream farce released by Hollywood over the past 20 years. Super cameos by a wealth of indie and some not-so-indie directors are fabulous. Great stuff.