Change Your Image
SultanRahi
Ratings
Most Recently Rated
Reviews
La vie sans secret de Walter Nions (2001)
Really not good
First film by Hugo Gélin and to be frank, it's really bad. The acting is terrible, the camera effects annoying and the story lame. The photography is average.
An old man is annoying people in the street and remembers his childhood, especially his mother's perfume shop, "as he remembers his first love" (the dialogue is that bad, yes), like this ordinary day in the car with his parents where he was listening to some anachronistic music, and annoying his parents (he's very good at that). Back to the present, he enters a perfume shop and starts calling "maman" the woman working there while putting his head on her bosom. Then, going back to his apartment, he gave flowers to his neighbour, a young woman living with her family of really bad actors, a thing he does every single night. The film ends with the old man thinking of suicide and deciding to kill himself with his fingers instead of a gun.
So yeah, really bad. Doesn't really make you want to watch any film directed by Hugo Gélin (who found money to make films only because he's from a family of actors and producers). Even Jean Rochefort can't save this wreck.
Yi dai zong shi (2013)
What a waste of time
I have to be frank: this is the first Wong Kar Wai movie that I watch, and it will be the last one.
The action is quite slow, but it's not the main problem. The characters talk a lot, but hat shouldn't be a problem too. The fact is that nothing is new here. Flying Chinese? Platonic lovers? Erotic innuendos? If it was wisely done, it could have been great but it's clearly not. I slept twenty minutes before the end.
When the Grandmaster, who seem to live in a whorehouse (I'm not joking here) became... well, grandmaster, he seems to be the new Corleone/Dolemite and all the fighting ethical gibberish that he's pouring afterward seem highly ridiculous.
I have also to say that I'm bored of flying Chinese in films where they are not supposed to do so. They fly for two minutes above the stairs? Is it supposed to be a creative allegory or just some nonsense thrown at the spectator who should be grateful to see something entertaining because, well, impossible in real life?
The story too is terrible. Instead of talking of the Grandmaster's complete life, or one episode of it, we have some parts here and there. He goes to Hong Kong, and it seems important to the plot, when it's definitively not. We understand that he crave to have sex with Gong Er, as much as she wants, but how silly is it for the director to stretch this fantasy to a two long hours boring series of monologues and old unrealistic slow, boring, uninteresting, artificially fake, fighting scenes.
Talking of the monologues, they sound like a speech by a sport teacher who is trying to explain the meaning of life before asking the students to run for twenty minutes around the school racing tracks. Anyway, how can you be an example when you just look like a pimp? And that all your skill is plastic like?
Underdog (2007)
Finally a kids' film with a real villain
Of course this film has some flaws but it's still quite a decent super-hero flick. Nothing exceptional, just old good family entertainment but what's wrong with that ? Dog's voices are well chosen and the dialogues are okay, and that's great because it's really a challenge to have pets talking and not be annoying after two minutes of unfunny jokes about been a dog. The CGI is not very good but, well, my personal opinion is that CGI is bad 95% of the time anyway ; wait ten years and you will see what I'm talking about. But it's not overused here and that doesn't hurt the eyes too much. Alex Neuberger doesn't know how to scream, right, and James Belushi doesn't do much and it will have been nice to give him some more lines, like the postman in "Racing Stripes" by the same director who is just not here all along. I never saw the old cartoon but to be faithful to it just to please some fans (sorry if I'm being rude here) would ruin the film. Just look at 'Astérix and Obélix' by Claude Zidi to have an idea of what it would be : something that looks like a good idea but is in fact just plain uninspired and boring. And for fans like me of Krypto the Superdog it's quite enjoyable.
And the best for the end : Peter Dinklage is the best choice for a villain. Him as Dr. Psycho in a possible Wonder Woman film would definitely be a smooth move. Usually action films for kids fail when it comes to choose who will play the villain. Underdog doesn't.
The Password Is Courage (1962)
Is it supposed to be realistic?
Well, I have to admit that this film is not so bad. Well, the Great escape, is really more interesting, well played and realistic. But here, you have a true story with some supposed to be hilarious scenes that are not funny at all (hilarious burning down of an entire lumber yard? Oh! Come on!). It's too far from anything possible. Well, I admit, I don't like Hogan's heroes, but at last, it's not supposed to reflect the real WWII. The fact that every prisoner is happy, mocks and laughs at stupid Germans is quiet the opposite of the truth. So, it can work if this movie is not what it try to be: representation of a true story. It seems to be something like a post-war propaganda (British are the strongest! Huh?). And badly made propaganda makes me laugh. That's why it's not so bad.