trevorandrewmillar-70769 Reviews

Await Further Instructions (2018)

Rip-off!

[3 May 2023]

Back on 1972, BBC2 showed as its customary"Christmas Ghost Story", a play called"An Exorcism"; basically. A yuppie couple and their dinner party guests are trapped in their Dorset cottage; their Christmas Dinner makes them feel sick, one of the guests hears a child crying. Another sees a skeleton in their bed, and a third goes into a trance, speaking with the voice of a woman who lived in the cottage 150 years before; her husband had been hanged for his part in the Captain Swing riots, and she and her children subsequently starved to death. She said she had put a curse on the cottage; any rich people who lived there would suffer the same fate. The play ends with an "and finally" item on the BBC News; a newsreader (Richard Baker) reports that Dorset Police had entered a cottage and found six people apparently dead from starvation, but with a table full of food. The similarities with this film are remarkable.

End of Part One (1979–1980)

Unexpected nasty bit

[5/10 · 19 March 2023]

Best sketch ever; a film if a cute rabbit eating lettuce while messages keep coming up warning viewers of an "Unexpected Nasty Bit"; then there's a clock with a one minute countdown to the UNB, with a siren fir the last ten seconds, and a flashing caption,"Watch out for the severed head"; by this time we were all hiding behind the sofa! And then, when the click reaches zero, there's a voice over; "Due to circumstances beyond our control we are unable to bring you the unexpected nasty bit"; TALK ABOUT ANTICLIMAX!

And THEN, after the end titles, there's the ad for the VHS cassette of the series, AND ON THE COVER IS A CARTOON OF SOME GUY GETTING HIS HEAD CUT OFF! How many complaints did LWT get for this?

Whore (1991)

For your information

[3/10 · 20 November 2021]

When you watch this film just keep in mind; Ken Russell diddled the author out of his share of the royalties! He's still driving a cab in King's Cross and still pretty pissed off about it.

It's based on a play called"Bondage"; I saw it on stage in a theatre in Islington; it's a 45-minute monologue and "Liz" is the only person on stage throughout, speaking direct to the audience.

Gone (I) (2017–2018)

Great idea,but...

[4/10 · 8 August 2021]

Great idea, we'll executed, BUT...no matter how well qualified as a consultant Kick is, there is no WAY she would be issued a gun and be allowed to kick in doors.

It's harder to get into the FBI than the SAS, you'd have to be a genius level intellect AND be a specai forces level expert with firearms. The training is as arduous as that for the SAS and 90% of applicants flunk out, the bad old days under Hoover when all you needed was a diploma in accounting from Southern University and a visceral hatred of "commies" are long gone. Apart from that, I liked it.

The Good Life (1975–1978)

unashamed tory propaganda

[1/10 · 8 May 2021]

This program was one of several that articulated the "siege mentality" of the middle class under what was at the time a fairly left-wing Labour-party government (having won a general election after a nationwide strike by miners and power-station workers); the "class that gets out of the bath to pee" has always claimed that it is "up against the wall" when Labour is in power; usually because they can't find people willing to be domestic servants when union power means that factory jobs offer better pay! And Margot Leadbetter is a walking case-study in "Narcississtic Personality Disorder"; neurotic, self-obsessed, and snobbish to the point of barely-suppressed hysteria, only surpassed by Hyacinth "Bouquet! Bouquet! It's pronounced Bouquet!" Bucket!

Hell Drivers (1957)

fond memories

[5/10 · 22 April 2021]

I first saw this on tv one sunday afternoon in 1962; I remember because later that same day they showed an episode of "Interpol Calling", called "The Heiress", that re-used footage of Red's truck going over the edge of the quarry and exploding; as the truck had the word Hawlett's on the side it was a dead giveaway!

Goodbye, Columbus (1969)

Semi-autobiographical?

[2/10 · 26 February 2021]

What I don't get is, Neil is over 21, he's been in the army, and he's never ever heard of...condoms? Every ex-squaddie is used to the idea of taking precautions, they all get the lectures where the MO tells them, "Always use a rubber, you dont want your short-arm looking like this", and then he either shows you the slides or one of those VD films; so why did he leave it to Brenda to take precautions? Phikip Roth wrote the thing in the 50s, when the Pill didn't even exist! And another thing; walking out on her like that at the end, makes Neil the biggest asshole in films EVER! And, if the book this film is based on is, like much of Roth's work, semi-autobigraphical, then so is Philip Roth! And as for what "Portnoy's Complaint" says about him...

Q: The Winged Serpent (1982)

David Carradine

[4/10 · 14 February 2021]

Of course, "Grasshopper"(David Carradine)'s Kung-fu training means that he can shoot a flying dragon monster out of the sky but without feeling hate for it!

Apparently, the movie principally parodies the defining characteristic of New Yorkers; that they never look up because (a) all those skyscrapers mean that there's nothing to see, (b) you can't see the sky anyway, and (c) you might just get hit in the eye by something being dropped from 40 storeys up (like a canteloupe...)

High Hopes (1988)

"Mister Sausage Is on the stairs!"

[5/10 · 12 January 2021]

Mike Leigh really catches the nasty, spiteful, snobbish, neurotic upper-middle class "yuppie" couple trying to get their elderly neighbour evicted, to a "T"! They represent Thatcherism personified i all its ugly reality.John Sullivan, creator of "Citizen Smith" and "Only Fools & Horses" described the middle-classes as "All cashmere sweaters and marital aids (sex toys)"; Leigh has shown them up as being jealous of the working class because of their own inability to perform sexually without indulging in childish role-play, in this case Mrs Booth-Braine sitting on top of the stairs, teddy bear on her lap, crying "Mister Sausage is on the stairs!", truly a phrase with which to taunt the yuppie class!

The Fast Lady (1962)

A Bentley for £500?

[5/10 · 10 January 2021]

The only unbelieveable thing in this film is that an underpaid local government clerk (Baxter) was able to buy a mint-condition 1927 racing "Blower" Bentley, a Le Mans winner, for only £500! You couldn't buy one at that price , even back in1962, unless it was a total wreck; today that car would be worth millions!

Fort Ti (1953)

One glaring inaccuracy

[1/10 · 28 December 2020]

This film fails to mention one thing; there were as many Indians on the British side as there were on the French, so many that after the war George III issued all the friendly tribes with brass medallions identifying the tribe as British subjects and giving them the protection of the British Crown; indeed, the Sioux tribe obtained one and used it to claim asylum in Canada after the massacre at Little Big Horn.

Brave Warrior (1952)

Peppered with inaccuracies!

[1/10 · 28 December 2020]

When it comes to historical inaccuracy, this film wrote the book! For a start: It never mentions that President Madison started the war in the first place,(by attacking, occupying and destroying Toronto) he thought that, with Britain preoccupied with Napoleon, she would be in no position to defend Canada; he also thought that britain would lose since our "best" general, Wellington, was tied up with the Peninsular War in Spain; but he had reckoned without General Isaac Brock, our REAL best general (never mentioned in the film), who not only burned Washington and occupied New York, but captured Detroit! Also, Tecumseh supported Britain, not the US; he even went on fighting after the Brits retreated across the Canadian border! AND, contrary to what Americans think, Britain WON the war; Wellington marched into Paris after Waterloo and forced the US Ambassador (Thomas Jefferson!) to sign a peace treaty (at gunpoint!) promising never to threaten Canada ever again! The only battle the Yanks won was New Orleans, and that was fought AFTER Jefferson had signed the treaty, so there!

Trench 11 (2017)

only one glaring mistake.....

[5/10 · 26 December 2020]

There was one glaring mistake in this movie; Lt Berton is shown being brought back from leave (forcibly) by two soldiers with red covers on their caps, presumably British Army Royal Military Police, known as "Redcaps"; except that the RMP wasn't founded until 1943, along with their distinctive red caps. Apart from that, the period detail was excellent.

The Third Man (1959–1965)

Did you know...?

[5/10 · 13 December 2020]

This serial is notable for two things; 1) Orson Welles was so annoyed that he wasn't entitled to any money from this series (he felt he "owned" the character of Harry Lime) that he released a radio series, called "The Lives Of Harry Lime", based on the adventures of Lime before the events of "The Third Man" novel and movie, as a spoiler operation; his version of Lime was more like the character Welles portrayed in the movie "The Lady From Shanghai" than Graham Greene's sleazy spiv. 2) According to Emlyn Williams, in his book "Beyond Belief" about the British 1963-65 "Moors Murders", the killer Ian Brady, when questioned by the prison psychiatrist, on why he committed the murders, claimed that the TV series made him do it, that he "wanted to be like Harry Lime".

The Professionals: Man Without a Past (1978) Season 2, Episode 4

Bodie uncharacteriscally gobsmacked!

[5/10 · 19 November 2020]

This episode contains the best moment in the entire series; when Bodie grabs the man who has been tailing him for the best part of the episode, empties his pockets, and his jaw drops when he finds the man's I.D; "F.B.I!?"

The Professionals: It's Only a Beautiful Picture... (1980) Season 4, Episode 15

Was this originally an "Avengers" script?

[4/10 · 19 November 2020]

This episode looks like it was originally written for "The Avengers"; the gang (a bunch of yokels led by a stereotype country squire)read as realistic as a 4-pound note, and seem to be no more than comic relief.

The Professionals: Hijack (1980) Season 4, Episode 11

Based on an actual incident

[5/10 · 19 November 2020]

This episode was based on an actual incident; in 1980 the price of silver went sky-high due to speculation by Texas oil billionaire Nelso Bunker Hunt; a London gang really did hijack the truck hired by the East German government to move their silver reserve to Tilbury docks and abroad; but when the "bubble" burst and the price of silver fell, the robbers discovered that the haul was practically worthless, so they dumped the load (in a lock up garage in Dagenham) and sold the truck; it was worth more than the load!

Chicago Joe and the Showgirl (1990)

The look on Emily Lloyd's face; PRICELESS!

[15 November 2020]

The best moment in this film is when Jones and Hulten are sitting in Jones' (stolen) army truck, and she is "rabbitting" about how muich she wants to be his "gun moll"' in response he produces a 9mm automatic and cocks it under her chin; she immediately assumes a facial expression, the last time I saw anything like it was in an episode of "All Creatures Great And Small", in which Herriot had crept up behind a cow on a cold day and taken it completely by surprise; Jones (and the cow) looked like they had been suddenly, and without warning, indecently assaulted! And on a cold day and all! How DID they get her to produce that expression?

Good-Time Girl (1948)

Not bad, could have done better.

[3/10 · 15 November 2020]

This film appears to have been inspired by the "Cleft Chin Murder" (later dramatised in the 80s as "Chicago Joe and the Showgirl"), particularly at the end where Jean Kent's character teams up with two AWOL GIs to steal a car (and kill the driver); Flora Robson's magistrate comes across as the biggest hypocrite, sending a first offender to an "approved school" which abandons control to the biggest thug in the place (like the "Kapo" system used by the Nazis in the KZs!); if anything it's an indictment of the juvenile "justice" system in force at the time! Fortunately the "Approved School" system was abolished in 1988 after one too many sexual-abuse scandals, at the system's "showcase" school in Yorkshire!

Nothing But the Truth (I) (2008)

Not As Good As "Absence of Malice"

[1/10 · 18 October 2020]

They resolved all this hoo-ha in about two minutes in "Absence Of Malice". When Wilford Brimley demanded that Katherine Ross reveal who the leaker was, and her lawyer shouted "The First Amendment guarantees the anonymity of sources!", Brimley shouted back, "The First Amenment makes no mention of sources! The privilege does not exist!" And Ross folded like a newspaper. Why didn't they do that here? All she had to say was, "I got it from her kindergarten-age daughter". Of course, she would have lost ALL her credibility for relying on such an unreliable source, but it was hardly worth going to jail for (what was it, two years?) for, unless she was REALLY into cleaning toilets and lesbian gang-rape....

Nothing But the Night (1973)

A middling film ruined by a disappointing ending.

[1/10 · 3 September 2020]

After two hours of buildup, I found the ending disappoointing. Okay, so the orphanage is a cover for a cult whose members steal the children's bodies for the purpose of reincarnating themselves; but why was the ending such an anti-climax? Even Hammer's worst efforts included a laboratory scene, like in "Frankenstein Created Woman", which explained how it was done. If anything this film proves that not only should actors never be allowed to direct, we should be very careful when allowing them to produce as well.

Hurry Sundown (1967)

Michael Caine totally miscast.

[1/10 · 3 September 2020]

Michael "Not A Lot Of People Know That!" Caine's "Deep South" accent was the worst attempt at sounding American since Patrick McGoohan's in the TV series "Rafferty" (mercifully forgotten, wiped, and dumped in the wastepaper basket of history for all time); what happened, couldn't they get an actual American, like, say, Richard "Man In A Suitcase" Bradford?

Quatermass (1979)

pretty good, considering....

[5/10 · 10 June 2020]

I thought this work was a reasonable example of a s/f work; like all the best s/f, it wasn't so much a prediction of the future as a comment on contemporary (for the 70s) trends; the only real prescience was the privatised police force (the Contract Police or PayCops); my only beef is, that the ending was too like the one in that episode of Star Trek where Kirk used himself as bait to attract the vampiric cloud creature and destroyed it with an anti-matter bomb; unlike Kirk, Quatermass didn't have the option of "beaming out" at the last second. In my opinion, John Mills was the only actor in Britain at the tine with the moral authority to carry it off, which he does very well.

The Beast of War (1988)

A metaphor for Palestine

[3/10 · 26 May 2020]

Not bad as far as it goes; of course although it's ostensibly about the Russians in Afghanistan, it's "really" about the Israelis and Palestinians; the clue is when george Dzundza tells the main character "I fought the Nazis for you!", and gets the reply, "You don't get it, do you Sarge; right here, right now, in this country, WE'RE the Nazis!"

Fox Mystery Theater: In Possession (1984) Season 1, Episode 6

was this the first of its kind?

[8/10 · 26 April 2020]

Nice basic premise; the murder witnessed by the two protagonists occurs not in the past but in the future; the story had been televised once before back in the 60s, as part of the BBC's anthology series "Out Of The Unknown"; apart from being re-used in ITV's "afterlife" I don't think I've ever seen it used anywhere else, unless of course someone else knows differently, in which case could they please enlighten us? Somewhat ruined by the ending, where Carol Lynley realises that the couple moving in are the one she saw in her nightmares (and the wife is going to be murdered); she reacts by screaming her head off; would have been better if only the audience had been "in on it", so to speak.