Change Your Image
seedsuffering-16987
Reviews
Doctor Who: The Church on Ruby Road (2023)
Gatwa deserves better
The special was a thing. The writing was awful. The dialog was like watching a CW show. And this is RTD doing Who. This is worst than he had The Doctor beat The Master with "belief". Gatwa I was into from the 60th. Seemed like a fun full of life Doctor but the writing. I want to love Who again after the terrible writing if the Chibnall era but after this episode I just hope when the new series starts in the spring is good and better written. Cause this is how you do Gatwa's first outing and don't make it good or a compelling story. What was this Xmas special? Please don't let us get a terrible new Doctor with that could get great with the worst writing.
Malum (2023)
It has some cool stuff by why remake an already good movie?
The only good in this Last Shift remake (by the same director) was the scene with the followers having the sheet headed ghosts were still cool looking and the effects on the demon were good but the demon looked really goofy. Why the original was good was it was a good slow burn horror. Slow burn horror is obviously hit and miss but Last Shift did it right. It didn't feel scary. It felt like a bad mainstream horror movie. I mean the Malum version of Paimon wasn't as good. He wasn't a demonic Charlie Manson with a pentagram carved in his face. And the new ending sucked cause the fun of the original was it felt like it was in her head when the cops killed her but she just kills herself. The twist ending where Paimon was driving her insane was way cooler. Also you don't get the utterly stupid moment with the ghost cheering and clapping that took you completely out of the movie. There was no way to improve on the original and the director seriously wasted his money when he should of done a new film.
Guillermo del Toro's Cabinet of Curiosities: Dreams in the Witch House (2022)
Wasted potential.
This was the episode I was most excited about and it was a complete let down. The only good I can say about it is it looks good, set design was good, acting wad and The Witch looked cool. That's all. The story is entirely changed except for there being the 3 core characters, the house and dreaming. Instead of a story about traveling to other dimensions (including an Elder Thing city and the Center of Chaos) and trying to stop The Witch, Jenkins and Nyarlathotep from sacrificing a baby, we get a generic evil witch story with a ghost sister and the theme from Outlander randomly popping up through out the episode. I'm fine with changes to a story. I mean Stuart Gordon's The Masters of Horror version was closer to the story, they just didn't have the budget to do the traveling to other dimensions and he added some stuff. But this version had a budget and there's no reason they couldn't of done those sequences, let alone completely change the story.
Hellraiser (2022)
Worse than Hell on Earth, Revelations and Judgement.
Starting with the good. The Cenobites look great (minus Chatter who looked better in the original) the FX were for them were awesome. Other than that the movie blew. No gore, unlikeable characters and just z movie horror tropes. It took forever for things to happen. Maybe of there was gore and characters I cared about I'd feel different but no this felt like the awful Book of Blood remake that equally sucked. I feel bad for all the actors and the FX department for be stick with an awful script. They deserved better especially since they were doing the Hellbound Heart version of Pinhead (well in look only not character cause the writers have no clue on how to write a Hellraiser film). Save yourself the time and just watch the original.
Eternals (2021)
2 only cause IMDB forced me
First Zhoa shouldn't have done this film cause she tried to copy Denis Villeneuve instead of doing her own vision. She was influenced by Denis' Dune but that's not how you make a Kirby film. It was boring. Maybe cause I'm a New God's fans and the Eternal's is Kirbt's spiritual sequel I'm not a fan. It just dragged. Every character felt meh minus Sersi and Black Knight. But what pisses me off most is the post credit scene. Pip the Troll voiced by Patton Oswalt is an an abomination not cause of Patton cause his is my ideal casting of Pip and reminds me of how the MCU screwed up the Infinity Gauntlet (hardcore Starlin nerd) the MCU was due as failed.
Mortal Kombat (2021)
Only cause of Hiroyuki Sanada
Hiroyuki Sanada is the only good part. He has been my ideal Scorpion but of course it has to happen in a MK film that makes Annihilation look like a masterpiece.