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Reviews
The Shepherd (2008)
Generic
I had high hopes for this one until they changed the name to 'The Shepherd : Border Patrol, the lamest movie name ever, what was wrong with just 'The Shepherd'. This is a by the numbers action flick that tips its hat at many classic Van Damme films. There is a nice bit of action in a bar which reminded me of hard target and universal soldier but directed with no intensity or flair which is a shame. There is one great line about 'being p*ss drunk and carrying a rabbit' and some OK action scenes let down by the cheapness of it all. A lot of the times the dialogue doesn't match the characters mouth and the stunt men fall down dead a split second before even being shot. The end fight is one of the better Van Damme fights except the Director tries to go a bit too John Woo and fails also introducing flashbacks which no one really cares about just gets in the way of the action which is the whole point of a van Damme film.
Not good, not bad, just average generic action.
Submerged (2005)
Seagals hairpiece best supporting actor!
Where do I start, I mean seriously within the first 5 minutes we see a spy plane flying at an altitude of 100 feet (which gets spotted!) that is made of cardboard, a bunch of crack marines landing in a field and being ambushed by some terrorists hidden under a couple of bushes 10 feet away from them. A suicide bomber in South America?!?!? A cast made up of British Soap Opera characters from Emmerdale Farm and Coronation Street, Vinnie Jones putting his worst performance in since he cupped Gazza's balls when he played for Wimbledon, a script so clichéd and full of lame lines that it's like it was written on napkin on the way to the set in tomato ketchup! On to Seagal, F**k me what a show he puts on, over weight, DUBBED!, Black Ghetto speaking, awful awful fights that I'm fair sure he had a stunt man for. There is one ace thing though, Seagals hair piece which puts in a mesmerising performance and definitely should be up for an Oscar in a best supporting role! And to be honest, he films called Submerged but they spend barely anytime on a Sub!!!!!!!!!!! What a waste of 2 quid!
Until Death (2007)
Jean Claude - super kicks = Great movie
There has been a lot of hype over the years with numerous Van Damme comebacks, We are constantly promised each new release is the one, the film to signal the return of some bad ass van damage! So Until Death, whats the crack then, any good? Well in my humble opinion I would have to give it a resounding thumbs up. Not very likely for a straight to DVD action flick straight into the Tesco DVD chart at number 19 starring a washed up action star.
The golden generation of action stars i grew up watching are getting old, it's a sad fact, there once ripped physiques are now saggy old man boobs and there latest releases with the exception of the amazing Stallone Rambo/Rocky comeback tend to fail to live up to the standard set in there early classic pictures. Arnie began to loose it after the atrocious Batman & Robin, Seagal fair lost it after Under siege, Van Damme after the monumental flop that was Double Team & Stallone after the quite frankly pants Get Carter, Driven, D-Tox, etc... So back to the movie.
Van Damme plays a junkie crooked cop as bent as Peter Crouch's flailing limbs. Know one likes him, his wife is playing hide the sausage with some fancy man & gets knocked up and quite frankly the wham bam Van Damme man has not a lot to live for. He is hot on the trail of the incredibly clichéd named Rogue Cop/criminal Calahan who used to be his partner, another cliché thrown into the story but nether the less plays an important anchor for the characters actions. Van Damme gets shot in the head and is put in a coma, but will he come out of it a better person? You will just have to head to the Teco DVD chart to find out :) Van Damme has realised with his waining popularity over the years and the inabiliity to star in bigger budget productions he cant do the action as well as in Hard target and Time Cop etc and hasn't got the resources and the Directors offering him work he used to. This means that Until Death has much more Drama and much more plot and story time to really get you interested in the characters, the action does come and is run of the mill shoot, shoot duck behind barrel, then shoot some fella wearing really crap sunglasses it even has a few quoteable lines for when your in the Pub with the lads to act out, which is fantastic if you ask me. The supporting cast do a fine job, with a few slightly dodgy American accents along the way, Van Damme plays the lead with great dignity and i really genuinely believe this is his best role since, well ever acting wise.
Even the name of the film is quite poignant for the themes recurring in the film and at the credits I had a 'I get it moment'.
If you are a fan of Jean Claude and would like to see him doing something rather than roundhouse people in the face I would definitely recommend Until Death it's a fantastic character driven movie that for a couple of quid on DVD is well worth adding to your collection.
Roll on The Shepherd! :) Van Dammes back!