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Reviews
The Alpha Incident (1978)
The most artful and creative masterpiece of its time
Understandably, many viewers do not see the true value of The Alpha Incident. Sure, the acting is not necessarily great and the set up is slow, but this is all part and parcel to the overall project. Only the most inexperienced layman would write off this masterwork as a "bad" movie, a "B" movie to be ridiculed. In the case of The Alpha Incident, B stands for beguiling.
As the main characters are sitting in the train station, struggling to stay awake, you find that you, watching the movie, are doing the same thing. Immediately you are transported into the characters' psyches. You become part of the movie, and before you know it, the movie becomes part of you.
So watch, nay, live The Alpha Incident.
Die Hinrichtung (1976)
Social Decay in Cinematic Form
I have never been more convinced that, like the Ouroboros feasting on its own flesh, this movie is both symptomatic of and inspiration to the very worst in society. Allow me to correct many of the comments made by other posters for this black hole of a movie.
1. This movie is not a thriller. At no point are you held in suspense nor actually scared. There is no good music, very poor dramatic presentation, and no element of the unknown, which can form the basis of suspense. The main character makes Ted Bundy seem like Mr. Rogers, while simultaneously the overall piece leaves the viewer yearning for Freddy vs. Jason, simply because the jump to an actual suspense piece or thriller would be such a leap forward as to bend-space itself, potentially ending existence as we know it (then again, half way through this movie, this option does not sound too bad.) 2. This movie is disturbing, but not in an artistic, Hieronymus Bosch-type way where there is thought behind the disturbance. The predictable and tasteless imagery does not make you think about some deeper truth or put life in perspective or serve any of the multitudinous purposes disturbing imagery can serve in film or art. The movie is no more artistic than if I actually left my handycam recording as I raped and mutilated body after body for no reason other than a bad case of the "crazies." Sure, it would be pretty disturbing as my rape victim's tears mingle with her own blood, both of which cause me great sexual satisfaction. But artistic? You show me a person who thinks so, and I'll show you a person who sexually gratifies himself to German drum-bass and portraits of a youthful Adolf Hitler. No lie, I got his business card!!! As I want this posting to be available to people before they see the movie, I am desperately trying to avoid spoilers (although spoiling this movie would be the greatest gift anyone could have given me last night at around 2am). With that in mind, I decide to end my comment here, although the true "review" would be much longer as I really really do not want anyone to see or even talk about this movie ever again. The people behind it should be shunned in both cinematic and general social circles, and we, the damned who have seen the piece, should be granted subsidized brain surgery to remove it from our memories. Email me with comments or concerns.
Brain Smasher... A Love Story (1993)
If you're looking for a good Dice movie, ya got tha job, ya hear!
Diceman cometh of age in this fiesty, tongue-in-cheek love drama where the ninjas aren't the only thing that kicks ass. . . actually ninjas do nothing in this movie because there are no ninjas, only Shaolin Monks with a penchant for the theatre of the absurd.
Diceman, the most Italian Jewish actor in history, stars as a bold and brash bouncer believing himself to be beyond the behest of beautiful beau, Terri Hatcher. Watching Desperate Housewives these days makes me want to award Terri with a Most Improved Actress award, not because she's any good now, but because her acting in this early piece makes the Diceman look nearly competent. At one point, she actually breaks character and calls Ed by Dice's real first name, Andrew.
Does this sound like a negative review? I absolutely loved the movie, being a fan of shaolin monks, Dice, and the beautiful city of Portland. Well done all.