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Reviews
Morbius (2022)
I didn't want to believe reviews so I saw it myself....
You should believe the reviews.
Unlike the new Batman, where from the very first scene I was hooked and stayed that way through the whole thing, (And it was long. People said it was boring and dragged on, but this felt 100% longer and it was only 103 minutes I believe) with this movie by the half hour mark I was hoping it would end soon.
The beginning absolutely sails through the introductions, with the first scene being a CGI helicopter landing on a CGI ledge with CGI water flowing into a CGI cave. Jared Leto gets out of the helicopter, cuts his hand open and bats fly and attach themselves to him right away.... Then it cuts to him and his friend as children in a hospital a long time ago, and within a single introductory conversation switches between several different locations of them sitting around and doing different things in different times/places having the same conversation. Then it switches to Jared Leto becoming a doctor, and then him working in a hospital, and then him coming up with a cure for his disease, explaining how he's doing it and then the trial is successful and he has a cure! Let me remind you, this is all the very beginning of the movie... 'rushed' isn't even the correct word. At this point the script was nothing but keywords.
I had issues with no one being able to really describe the movie, and now I understand why; there's nothing to talk about. Things just become the way they are with no proper explanation.
A perfect example and probably the only one you'll need: Tyrese Gibson is chasing Leto through a 20-something story building. The center of the building is open so Leto FLIES to the roof of the building, leaving Tyrese on the bottom floor. He gets to the top and almost falls over the edge, and who is up there with him?! TYRESE GIBSON. My husband and I said, maybe he's a vampire too??
No! No he isn't! The movie ends with no purpose to him whatsoever and he is most definitely not a vampire and could not possibly find a bullet-train elevator to reach the top of the building at the same speed as someone who FLEW! (If there is an explanation for this please forgive me)
And then there's the "best friend forever" Milo. These two sat in the park together and had one conversation and we're expected to believe they have this unbreakable bond. Jared Leto takes the serum he designed on a ship in the middle of the ocean with many procedures in place to cure himself, (and ends up diving off the ship after he murders everyone and swimming all the way back to his hospital on the mainland like he's also a vampire speed-boat, apparently?) and yet his friend Milo somehow gets ahold of his serum and injects himself with it and becomes super powerful all behind the scenes with absolutely no explanation. From then on he spends the rest of the movie harassing Leto into "joining him"....to which Leto just keeps trying to ditch him like an annoying younger brother. Either that or they activity try to kill each other multiple times. You know, like best friends always do! Oh well. It doesn't hurt their feelings at all. In fact, nothing much does. Who is Milo anyway? Just some dude with a disease, no matter...
And through all this and without anything to do in the movie, the elderly doctor who helped them as young children remains the same age even though the children grow into men in their mid-thirties. He's also not a vampire, mind you. He just does a lot of Pilates to stay young, probably...
There's so much to talk about. I feel like I need a drink, a nap and something good to watch. So yes, believe the reviews. It is actually not good. But if you enjoy it, please enjoy it without shame.
Ore Monogatari!! (2015)
Just image a cute puppy....
It's cute little chubby body, it's little paws, twitching a little as it sleeps. And then it wakes up just long enough to yawn and give a little squeak in that adorable-yawning-puppy way. If you find that very cute, then imagine the essence of that image in your head being an entire 24 episodes long of feel-good cuteness. Because it does not get ANY cuter than this show!!
Unsolved Mysteries (2020)
Each episode could have been 10 minutes long.
For instance, the first episode on the missing husband? Without any real evidence, witnesses or conclusions drawn the entire summery could have been one sentence: Husband found dead after supposedly falling through a hole in a roof too far from neighbouring buildings to jump, and his friend refused to talk. The end. But yet they stretched it into an hour?
The entire time space is filled with shots of trees, buildings, people walking, old pictures and sad family members talking about unrelated things. There doesn't seem to be even a few minutes allotted for deeper theories or alternative causes of death? Too much wasted time. You can literally skip over and catch a few snippets of the mystery and then just turn it off. Because that's all your going to get anyway....husband and I used to love this show.
Dracula (2020)
Only finished first episode....I heard it gets WORSE?
Things done well:
Nice locations and cool castle.
Good special effects.
Dracula crawling out of the inside of a wolf was scary for a second.
Not good:
Oooh....
So near the end of this first episode everything good just kind of...goes away. A non-believing nun converts herself in two seconds to religion with almost zero doubt in her mind, then taunts Dracula at the gates of their church for about 45 minutes after a non-invitation while he paces around naked.
The main character 'johnny' is full-on undead and trying to eat his fiance alone in a room (not how you might be thinking) and she's just standing there talking to his hungry corpse how much she knows he loves her and feels so safe with him. Then tries to kill her.
He stakes himself in the chest after his fiance refuses to do it for him, but cant die because someone else needs to do it.
Dracula comes to his window and offers to do it for him, IF he simply invites him in! (He needs to be invited in to enter). So Johnny does?! He literally could have walked downstairs for 5 min and asked any nun, pedestrian, child, senior, pizza delivery guy to just stake him in the chest, but instead he invites in the devil himself to come on in so he can happily kill him and then head downstairs to murder the entire rest of the hundreds of women in the place too....?
THEN in the basement the suddenly-converted nun and fiance are hiding in a ring of holy crackers and Dracula comes down wearing a Johnny suit. His eyes aren't even the same color but she doesnt even notice. And his fiance says "Oh hey Johnny there you are nice and alive I see; come on in." Right after he tried to eat her upstairs 10 minutes ago and staked himself. "He's stronger than you think!" She tells the nun confidently, who stands there quietly while the fiance invites him into the ring.
A second later Dracula pulls off his Johnny face like Mission Impossible and TO BE CONTINUED!
Hmmm.
Don't think I will. Didnt really hook me. Good first half hour though.
Kaabil (2017)
....wow.....
I don't like subtitle movies. I never have. I knew Hrithik Roshan from years back, and only because an acquaintance of mine had a crush on him. My first experience seeing him in any film was Bang Bang, which I realized on spot was the best movie I have ever seen, low ratings be damned. I didnt know he could dance....well I was in for a treat to come. The next film i saw starring him was War, which I saw a week ago. And quickly replaced my previous favorite movie with this one.
Mind. Blown. (And welcome Tiger Shroff to the mix, hello Baaghi!!)
Well, since War, I've been watching every movie with this man in it and tonight it was time for Kaabil. I didn't know exactly what I was in for from the start. But from the very first second, the very first smile - I was crying. Solid. For almost the entire first hour and 45 minutes...I was so touched by this performance I dont know if I can watch it again. These two coupled actors became champions, and I was rooting for them until the tragedy happened and it broke my heart. I've seen such a range of emotion from Hrithik Roshan in his films - so broad of a PERSON is he...not only acting but in every aspect of himself. He said in a quote that all his talents are just pieces of his work, and he's always trying something new, working hard to give his 100% no matter what it is, and truly you will see this as you watch him...he's not an actor, he's a person, trying his best, inspiring us to do the same. But he IS a person and not everything he does is perfect. This movie captures that. He's gifted, (amazing voice mimicry) and he's driven to accomplish his goals; and he gets beaten up, hurt, bested, made a fool of. And yet he doesnt stop. And you will not quit rooting for him as this movie goes on. Up until the last second I was on the edge of my seat - the couch. And was exhausted by the end.
I know it all sounds fluffed up...I'm really just an average movie goer. All my life I've seen American movies and lately have been very dissapointed in many. But since that first subtitled movie starring this incredible man I've decided it's time to branch out. Hrithik has a dream to bring the world together by sharing all movies across the globe and including everyone to watch and enjoy. I fully support his ideal. We clearly need more people as passionate for life and love and adventure as this man is....wonderful inspiration. Thank you, Bollywood. Wonderful.