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Nope (2022)
An adventure that won't be appreciated by everyone.
Jordan Peele should be extremely proud of NOPE. Not only is this his best film, it's one of the best adventure films of the last few years. What he's crafted here is essentially Jaws: a man vs monster film that focuses as much on the characters as the titular monster. The mystery of Spielberg's film is fully present, though tonally Peele is much more at home with his down to earth black leads and their modern social problems.
It's not all great though. There are a few plot segways that either don't resolve or are underdeveloped. Peele seems to need to justify certain characters aspirations, as if the situation at hand isn't onus enough. The ending sequences are also more bumpy than the lead up; Peele ups the pace, sometimes with less than stellar results.
I can understand the somewhat divisive reviews. Adventure isn't always action packed and there is a fair bit of theory crafting where some people would like more scares. For me this is Jordan Peele's most mature, exciting movie.
The Batman (2022)
Pattinson is angry, but the stakes aren't high enough.
Matt Reeves The Batman is a strangely satisfying curiosity. Here we have a story about an angry man wearing an impenetrable suit, that allows him to co-exist with the creeps and criminals of Gotham. But the story is also about a man who has to rely on his powers of deduction in absence of violence, and this is where The Batman sometimes unwisely plants its focus.
There is very little action in this film, and never a scene to cheer for. Batman in this movie is just a angry rich kid who wants to clean up the streets. No League of Shadows backstory, no life changing encounter with a flock of bats. Pattinson's Batman likely learned what little fighting technique he has from Youtube; he built his suit to take lots of punches and bullets, he drives a muscle car, he squabbles with the cops (who openly throw him shade) and consorts with the seedy underbelly in night clubs.
The Batman is a regular guy who has just enough advantages to get by, but not enough to outright win. This makes him instantly recognizable as a person, and gives the movie amazing presence. But it also makes the movie so grounded that it's subject matter becomes mostly satire. The Riddler's serial killer arc really goes nowhere, and Batman fights the Mob.....again. This movie is basically Batman Begins without any of the heroic grandeur, with Pattinson being the best Batman ever in the least dangerous situation a Batman has ever faced. The last hour is basically a spoof of the Nolen movies, and the ending is full-on cringe.
Yet I couldn't take my eyes away. Pattinson's very human Batman carries the film through its gorgeous scenery and moody atmosphere. It's a character study, not a Batman film, but it succeeds enough to be worth a watch.
Candyman: Shadow Puppets (2020)
Woke brain food.
This movie is about as woke as modern horror can get. It doesn't subvert expectations and play on racial discomforts like Get Out: Candyman 2021 is literally a story about black ghosts and the responsibility that gets passed on to the supernatural when justice fails. It should be laughable and you wouldn't expect to take it seriously.
Except you do.
There isn't much runtime and the titular Candyman is more symbolic this time around. The horror is lightweight as well. The most prevailing thing is the very realistic characters and the symbolism. Basically Candyman gives you more to think about than horror.
It won't be everyone's cup of tea, but it's certainly a good movie.
Rambo: First Blood Part II (1985)
Insane action and timeless excitement.
Once this movie gets going, it becomes a flawless action movie. Pure escapism and Stallone is pretty much THE man's man. Modern action movies pale in comparison.
The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It (2021)
Nothing new
Conjuring 3 uses mostly cliche horror tropes to create a very "by the numbers" experience. This makes it an easy pass if you're looking for something sinister and refreshing, because we've all seen this movie before, by a different name, and likely done better. Other strikes against it are the Warren's aren't really interesting this deep into the series, and the Satan Worship angle is halfheartedly explored.
Basically don't waste a lot of money on this, but give it watch if you are about the series.
A Quiet Place Part II (2020)
Last of us: Part Meh
I want to like these movies. The concept is sound (no pun intended), and the setting is interesting. But this sequel suffered from many of the problems I had with the original, and there is still very little tension. The moment the characters are put in a bad situation, the solution appears before anything exciting happens, and the complete reliance on cgi for the creatures is immersion breaking. Worse, this sequel suffers from pacing issues as new characters are introduced simply as fodder and the back and forth story telling seems tacked on.
A competent sequel to a decent movie, but is still ultimately underwhelming.
Unhinged (2020)
Great Fun
This movie isn't amazing, but it is a pretty surreal 90 minute rollercoaster. Russell Crowe is so intimidating in this movie it made me question whether I would take my chances trying to come between him and a victim.
The cast that surrounds Crowes fury is adequate enough, but this is Russell's movie, you're going to see how much havoc he can get up. I enjoyed it.
Star Wars: Episode IX - The Rise of Skywalker (2019)
A joyless cut and paste slog.
The Last Jedi tarnished Star Wars, but it was a competent movie. It had a beginning, middle, and end, and while I disagree with Ryan Johnson's choices, I recognize that he can make a compelling film, even if it's something only he can enjoy. Knives Out proves this.
Rise of Skywalker in comparison, isn't just a terrible Star Wars movie. It's a terrible film. This
is evident right from the opening crawl. This is easily the worst prologue to a saga movie ever. It references an event that never officially happened (unless you play fortnight), talks about characters that don't exist (secret agents), and finally tries to give us insight into Kylo Ren's disposition (raging). It's BS and starts the movie on the wrong foot.
Then we get a truly contrived sequence of the events that puts Kylo Ren in the presence of the film's big bad, and I'm positive this sequence was filmed about a week before the movie premiered. Tonally it doesn't fit the movie at all, being more LOTR than SW.
Once we settle in, the movie does it's best Return of the Jedi impression, but with none of the mystery, or set pieces, which is a crime. This is the first SW movie with no memorable set piece. No Hoth, no speeder chase, no Battle of Endor, no asteroid field. Nothing. The commercials for the film show almost everything they thought would be exciting, in their entirety. None of these are actually any good. The single lightsaber fight is horribly choreographed, looking more like a senior golf club outing than a majestic jedi knight battle which is cringeworthy. The final space battle, which doesn't actually happen in space, amounts to a cgi videogame cutscene. It's embarrassing.
Finn and Poe, played by John Boyega and Oscar Isaac then, are the only reason to watch this film. They bring a good buddy cop feel to the uneven shenanigans, and I wouldn't have minded if they had been the film's primary focus. This team-up was never fully explored, and in hindsight, it's the only saving grace this trilogy has. Instead the film focuses on Rey and Adam Driver's sullen Kylo Ren, one a magical Jedi with powers that only existed in the extended universe till now, and the other an admittedly cool character who developed backwards since the Force Awakens. Adam Driver phones it in, looking like a bored Harrison Ford in ROTJ, but without any classic lines or memorable moments. Mark Hamil, this trilogy's real victim, is simply reciting lines at this point. I don't blame anyone for not wanting to be involved in this film.
There's way more, like the last 40 minutes being the worst good vs evil portrayal in the series, and the ending, which takes a big crap on George Lucas's mythology, but hey, that's what youtubers are for.
In closing, Go see Uncut Gems. Then pretend it's a Star Wars film. Miss this one if you can.
The Lighthouse (2019)
Pretentious and wholly unikable
This movie is bad. It has a great IMDB score, but I think that's wholly undeserving. It's pretentious garbage. Robert Eggers has made two stinkers now, and some people are lapping these up. Meanwhile, I'd rather see Jordan Peele and Ari Aster continue to refine 'Artistic Suspense", since they've created the two strongest films in this new sub-genera with Get Out and Midsommar.
Like he did with the "The Witch", Eggers puts a ridiculous amount of research onscreen, here mid 20th century lighthouse rigmarole. The problem, which is the same "The Witch" has, is that the characters, plot, you know, the movie-ness of it all, is shoe-horned into a visual exhibit. There is no plot here. There are lines, weird visuals, allusions to insanity; none of it goes anywhere because it was an afterthought. Eggers next movie will probably be a silent film. He seems made for it.
The big injustice, is that Willem Dafoe and Robert Pattinson are amazing actors. Even here, they do some justice to the horrible routine of it all. Dafoe has never looked crazier, and Robert Pattinson does a fair bit of physical transformation. It's all for naught though; these people appear to go crazy, or they don't. There might be a mermaid, but probably not. The sea-gull might have been possessed. Maybe. Ultimately, ambiguity is a clichéd plot device you use when you haven't figured out how things should fit together.
I doubt people really enjoyed this movie. It seems to be made for talking points.
Joker (2019)
Skeptical? Don't be. This is a great movie.
"Joker" is one of the best movie I've seen this year. But, lets get this out the way: it's not a comic book movie. In fact this is so far removed from anything 'Batman' related that it could have been called "Clown", and it would have still been the success it is. Setting this movie in fictional Gotham (which is just Ney York), having it orbit the DC universe, does nothing for this movie. In fact I hope Joaquin's quiet madman never turns into any of the other Joker personas we've seen, no not even Heath Ledger's. Joaquin's Joker is a soft spoken, confused and downtrodden man, not some maniac with a grudge against society, and the movie perfectly portrays social upheaval and the affect it can have on people already walking the line between clarity and chaos.
I really don't want to see this guy fight Batman. I think this version of the Joker is too based in reality, which is a good thing, and Joaquin does masterwork here, forcing you to connect with him and his struggles. The movie also has a heavy dose of ambiguity, and some nice twists that you won't see coming. Still, it's not an action movie. In fact, this is a modern day 'Taxi Driver', which is why things like gadgets and fake gun pranks would seem totally out of place.
Don't let skepticism over fake reviews stop you from seeing this great movie.
Ad Astra (2019)
Scenes strung together = Ad Astra
Brad Pitts latest is a collage of surreal scenes, wonky science, and minimalist script. It starts out like Gravity, becomes Interstellar, morphs into Life, and finally settles on the dark red pulse of 2001. It does this with confidence, almost like each idea should be provocative in itself. Ultimately though, Ad Astra reminds me of Bladerunner 2049: high falutin story telling with lazy character development and direction that centers on showing too many small, unnecessary things.
Brad PItt and Tommy Lee Jones are wasted on such minimalist fare.
It Comes at Night (2017)
Infuriating.
This movie stinks. It's pretentiously filmed, for no other reason than the people behind it were lazy. It asks several questions, but does not even hint at the answers that could have made the ending appropriately sympathetic. In fact, the final sequence of events made me angry. This movie is too lazy to answer these simple questions:
*Were couple #2 actually the little boys parents?
*What did the dog see 2 miles out in the forest that made him go crazy?
*Which kid let the sick dog back in the house?
*Did the older boy molest the younger kid, passing the sickness?
Was the little boy actually sick?
Leaving things to the imagination is fine if it results in a thought provoking examination and ultimately provides highs to a film. This movie? It leaves out things integral to even tolerating the barebones story. In the finale, the mother of the supposedly sick kid makes every effort to hide him from the camera, actually undermining the viewers ability to make sense of the sequence. It's not art. It's trash.
Good Boys (2019)
Laughed the entire time.
This movie is a blast! The kids are funny and the script has genuine emotional pull. It's something I'd watch multiple times. Definitely the funniest thing I've seen all year.
Midsommar (2019)
Nightmare under the Swedish Sun
Midsommar is a lean and mean take on "The Wicker Man", and true to the original story, the visitors are doomed, the inhabitants are evil-doers , and the surroundings are surreal. The fact that Midsommars main cast are in danger from nearly the moment they step foot near the Swedish commune, is impressive, as the films director Ari Aster drops much of the artistic trappings of his last film "Heredity ", and in return paints a collage of hallucinogenic upheaval, with evil underpinnings. The commune undermines the protagonists fears and desires, to disastrous effect.
Unfortunately, it's predictable. The film goes to great lengths to not be typical horror, with many of the kills taking place offscreen, lessening the impact. Finally, none of the characters act especially smart given their circumstances, which cheapens the experience somewhat.
All in all, a very enjoyable film.
Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019)
Not really a Godzilla movie.
Why America can't get Godzilla right is perplexing. They have decades of Japanese source material to go by. King of the monsters is another misstep that somehow happens to be worse than the 2014 "hide and seek" Gareth Edwards film. The problem, again, is that Hollywood seems to think a Godzilla film should be character driven. Well Newslash: nobody watches Godzilla movies for their human interactions. We want to see cheesey kaiju martial arts and urban destruction.
The biggest mistake KOM makes is that Godzilla and monster company only get a few minutes of shoddy cgi time. The meat of the movie is chase sequences between two groups of humans and the girl from 'Stranger Things' screaming up a storm.
Brightburn (2019)
Sociopathic kid with super powers throws a temper tantrum.
Ever wondered what Kal El would have been like without the stern backhand of Johnathan Kent, or Martha Kent's apple pies to warm his heart? Me either. Yet Brightburn poses an interesting question, even if wasn't asked: what would a psychopathic superboy be like in a world with no rules?
To answer that question, Brightburn gives us a retelling of the superman mythos with a few "killer kid" tropes thrown in for good measure. Superboy Bandon is the typical monster in the making, unattached and quiet spoken, who at 12 years old is completely oblivious of his loving parents and supportive family. Its not long before he discovers he has super powers, can't be hurt, and that nothing can stand in his way. Rather than embrace this revelation with an air of responsibility, he throws an hour long temper tantrum that, while gory and fun to watch, is ultimately shallow.
Honestly, the super powers are wasted and unnecessary. Brandon would be just as stereotypically evil with a gun or knife. What surprised me most about the movie was the kids' focus; his family. I was expecting a town siege type of film, with superbrat mowing down helpless townspeople, destroying buildings, etc. That is not what happens in this film. Brandon basically takes all his super powered teen angst out on his family, who are very likeable, great portrayals of good people stuck in a terrifying situation. This is not a movie where you root for the bad guy, I was hoping his family would figure out a way to take him out every second of the way, Brandon has no redeeming qualities.
Brightburn offers a curious glimpse into the dark side of superdom, though I wasn't sure if Brandon was evil because he wasn't human, or because he had extra x and y chromosomes. The movie doesn't do a great job of giving you the why, just that it is what it is.
Pet Sematary (2019)
Misses the point of the original story.
Stephen Kings Pet Semetary is a story of loss, of the anguish and confusion that accompanies loss, and the depths that people sometimes go when their emotions careen out of control and fantasy becomes a sanctuary. The supernatural elements are simply tools to lend gravitas to the entire affair. They aren't necessarily the focus of the story,
The 2019 screen adaptation misses the point unfortunately. Rather than spend any time making us care about the family, we get set pieces that are all meant to propel us into a supernatural laced second half. However the film fails to add tension or even an ominous feeling, and there are no real scares. The film digresses into a slasher derivative, which is an insult to the original story.
Jason Clarke and John Lithgow do their best with a simple script, but neither actor is tasked to show any range. Jete Laurance as Ellie was the only noteworthy performance, though she's reduced to a scowling murderous familiar by the movies end. Finally none of the thematic changes were necessary as they don't add to the story.
This is inferior to the 1989 film and an unnecessary reboot.
Creed II (2018)
Second best in the franchise.
Creed 2 isn't quite as glorious as the first Rocky film, but it's leaps and bounds better than the Ryan Coogler helmed original. This is important, as Adonis Creed (Michael B Jordan ) should be an interesting character study; his internal conflicts with an inherent legacy make him a nice contrast to Stallone's goodguy Rocky. Thankfully Creed 2 handles characterisation much in the way the original Rocky does, with plenty of quiet moments and large doses of realism. It's predictable, and the fights, along with the Drago sidestory, are merely interesting asides. Ultimately, this is an excellent film with likeable characters that just happens to be about boxing.