By now the equation is pretty much standardized: Madonna+movie=garbage. Except for "Desperately Seeking Susan"--which wasn't really a Madonna movie, just a movie she was in--Madonna has yet to make an even remotely watchable movie. Even the movies where she doesn't have a very big part ("Dick Tracy," for example) suck. Maybe she's contagious. For some reason, Madonna felt the need to prove that she can do a screwball comedy a la Judy Holliday. She can't. She also tried to prove, once again, that she can act. Once again, she can't. There is not one thing in this movie that is even REMOTELY funny. Madonna somehow felt the need for her "character" to use a squeaky voice; she wound up sounding like Fran Drescher with a head cold. Poor Griffin Dunne must have really needed to pay the rent to find himself in this dreck. Haviland Morris, who was very good in "16 Candles," plays basically the same character here, but because of the lousy writing and almost non-existent direction (James Foley is a good director, but apparently he was overruled by Madonna on just about every directorial decision he tried to make, and it shows), she doesn't come across as well as she did in "16 Candles." The "plot" is something about Madonna being framed for her boyfriend's murder, getting out of prison and becoming involved with Griffin Dunne, who works for the millionaire who framed her. This film is almost a complete waste of time--wait a minute, it IS a complete waste of time. If you find the need to waste an hour and a half of your life, do something more productive, like pounding a hammer against your head. It's not as painful as watching this thing.
Review of Who's That Girl
