I just saw the 1998 LOST IN SPACE and I still haven't recovered. How could they possibly have made a movie this bad? Two actual good actors, Gary Oldman and William Hurt, are trapped in this atrociously written, badly directed waste of $80 million. Whether or not you liked the cheesy 60s TV series, you're going to hate this.
Alright, this is how it goes: it's the future and there's pollution, world peace (ugh!), and terrorists. The Robinson family is going to fly through a "hyper-space-portal" (or whatever the hell they call it) to a planet on the other side of the galaxy to colonize it and save humanity. Hurt, playing a respected scientist with no time for his kids, says at a press conference "there's a lot of space out there to get lost in" (ugh!). Matt LeBanc from "Friends" is horribly miscast as the flying ace who will pilot the Robinson's earth-saving space ship. Then we come to the children... but we wish we hadn't. The little boy is a science-fair genius who wishes his dad had more time for him and the girl is a teenage stereotype who argues with her mother and keeps a video diary. They both have very high, annoying voices, and the lines they deliver are terrible on top of that. Then comes the mother. I don't know who played her, and I don't want to know. They all live in a futuristic house in a futuristic CGI geodesic dome (ugh!). Except for family tensions "I don't want to give up the next ten years of my life", the mission appears to be a shoe-in.
Then we meet Gary Oldman, the 1998 version of Dr. Smith. He would have been a terrific character if his lines weren't so terrible (I think Akiva Goldsman was trying for Shakespearian). Anyway, he's evil and loves it, and works for the terrorists. He sabotages to mission, getting himself trapped on the ship in the process, and getting the Robinsons lost you know where.
Along the way we see thoroughly unconvincing CGI used for just about everything, including an annoying monkey-creature that's supposed to be cute. The costumes (which director Hopkins had a hand in designing) are really terrible glossy-body-mold stuff (think BATMAN AND ROBIN for comparison) which basically gives everybody (even the kids) well defined ahem!- features. Even the music is bad, and horribly arranged. And the end titles go above and beyond tacky, being half music-video, including a rapped-over version of the original theme and sound-bites from the film. And then there's the robot, which the son makes friends with and teaches that it has a "heart" (ugh!).
The script and direction are still probably the worst atrocities in LOSTIN SPACE. One of the more embarrassing bits has LeBlanc explaining to Heather Graham (to whom he is pathetically attracted) the concept of constellations and draws Porky Pig on a window. Even during intimate dialogue scenes, none of our actors seem sincere, or even to be speaking to one another. These characters don't even talk like human beings.
It's hard to believe the studio didn't just put this one on the shelf and leave it there. In the end LOST IN SPACE didn't even make enough money to justify its release. The world really would be a better place without this movie.
Alright, this is how it goes: it's the future and there's pollution, world peace (ugh!), and terrorists. The Robinson family is going to fly through a "hyper-space-portal" (or whatever the hell they call it) to a planet on the other side of the galaxy to colonize it and save humanity. Hurt, playing a respected scientist with no time for his kids, says at a press conference "there's a lot of space out there to get lost in" (ugh!). Matt LeBanc from "Friends" is horribly miscast as the flying ace who will pilot the Robinson's earth-saving space ship. Then we come to the children... but we wish we hadn't. The little boy is a science-fair genius who wishes his dad had more time for him and the girl is a teenage stereotype who argues with her mother and keeps a video diary. They both have very high, annoying voices, and the lines they deliver are terrible on top of that. Then comes the mother. I don't know who played her, and I don't want to know. They all live in a futuristic house in a futuristic CGI geodesic dome (ugh!). Except for family tensions "I don't want to give up the next ten years of my life", the mission appears to be a shoe-in.
Then we meet Gary Oldman, the 1998 version of Dr. Smith. He would have been a terrific character if his lines weren't so terrible (I think Akiva Goldsman was trying for Shakespearian). Anyway, he's evil and loves it, and works for the terrorists. He sabotages to mission, getting himself trapped on the ship in the process, and getting the Robinsons lost you know where.
Along the way we see thoroughly unconvincing CGI used for just about everything, including an annoying monkey-creature that's supposed to be cute. The costumes (which director Hopkins had a hand in designing) are really terrible glossy-body-mold stuff (think BATMAN AND ROBIN for comparison) which basically gives everybody (even the kids) well defined ahem!- features. Even the music is bad, and horribly arranged. And the end titles go above and beyond tacky, being half music-video, including a rapped-over version of the original theme and sound-bites from the film. And then there's the robot, which the son makes friends with and teaches that it has a "heart" (ugh!).
The script and direction are still probably the worst atrocities in LOSTIN SPACE. One of the more embarrassing bits has LeBlanc explaining to Heather Graham (to whom he is pathetically attracted) the concept of constellations and draws Porky Pig on a window. Even during intimate dialogue scenes, none of our actors seem sincere, or even to be speaking to one another. These characters don't even talk like human beings.
It's hard to believe the studio didn't just put this one on the shelf and leave it there. In the end LOST IN SPACE didn't even make enough money to justify its release. The world really would be a better place without this movie.