Review of Greenmail

Greenmail (2002 Video)
So average, it's not even "funny" average
22 December 2002
Some films "know" they are bad, and they have fun with it. But Greenmail isn't fun, it's just average, in fact the most "average" film I have ever seen.

I just could not believe that the cops were supposed to be cops at any stage of the film. For one thing, they all look like they just went shopping at The Gap. They all have nice haircuts and manicures. They are all like fluffy cats.

The "police station" is actually the interior what looks to be Adobe Software's site in Fremont (if you know Seattle). My point is that it just simply doesn't look like a police station.

Now everyone just shopped at the Gap and they're all in their cubicles at the software company (err.. police station). Some strange faxes show up from the mystery bomber, a la "exposition". The cops read the faxes. It's in a nice font, since we are at Adobe Software, anyways. Boy, are the cops scared. One nearly drops his coffee mug.

Ok, there was one part where I really laughed. Basically they had to defuse a bomb, and the lead Gap-clothes cop says, "don't worry, I've done this before". She walks up to the bomb. Now all of them are supposed to be wearing these visors that cover their heads. Now OBVIOUSLY if there was a bomb nearby, wouldn't you want your visor down? But they are all just hanging out by the bomb, having a good ol' time. In other words, they aren't scared, they don't have their visors down, in fact some of the extras are just kind of hanging out near the bomb... which means NO DRAMA.

Wouldn't a real bomb squad be called in? Wouldn't the real bomb defuser be in an elaborate bomb-proof suit, while everyone else was a safe distance back? Wouldn't there be a little bit of tension.. at all?

It has some wonderful, experienced actors in it, but they cannot save it. Unfortunately the lead actress (forget her name) just cannot play a cop - especially a tough, bomb-defusing cop.

The script is laden with too much exposition (a ridiculous amount of exposition, in fact), and dialogue that consistently derails any dramatic tension.

Even the "prisoner", Baldwin, wears an orange fuzzy sweater from The Gap instead of a prison/jail jumpsuit. COME ON! These are supposed to be talented actors.

They had a large enough budget for explosives and decent actors, so I don't think the faults in this film can be chalked up to "low budget"-ness.

The difference between a great director and a mediocre director? See "traffic", and watch the scenes that can be done on a low budget. Compare. Contrast. And realize that Soderbergh deserves his success, while the director of "Greenmail" is a very average director.

Ok, to be fair, they make an effort with the gunfights, explosions, and so on.. but overall it is just one average boring film. Blah.
8 out of 8 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink

Recently Viewed