4/10
A Good Mock-Fest Candidate
26 March 2007
"The Three Musketeers" (1948) is probably the most spectacularly miscast film in cinema history. This will be either hilarious or painful; depending on a viewer's sense-of-humor perversity quotient.

The idea of casting Lana Turner and June Allyson in a period costume drama was absurd on its face, but the results are actually worse than you could imagine.

Turner was arguably the least talented of the big-name actors of her era. Her appeal was strictly physical and she was serviceable playing herself in "Andy Hardy" type stuff. But she simply had no ability (even with good direction) to play anyone else, let alone an exotic villainess like the Dumas' Lady De Winter. And by the late 1940's the aging process had hit her particularly hard; taking away any trace of the youthful glow that had seemed so magical early in her career. At the time of casting Turner (still clueless that she had lost the physical appeal that had made her a star and apparently unaware that her career was already headed steeply downhill) was reluctant to take a "supporting" role.

Then there is Allyson; she had a clue about acting but her presence brought no magic to the screen. Her most successful roles were as contemporary tomboys, not as an inspirational love interest in a lavish costume drama. Allyson was all Bronx and that just doesn't fit the tone of the Dumas classic.

As D'Artagnan, Gene Kelly at least provides a reason to watch "The Three Musketeers". He is physically suited to the role and handles the acrobatic action sequences quite well. But Kelly was more dancer than actor. As someone said, his acting is much like Bob Hope without the comedic sensibility. I found it hard to keep from thinking about his faux silent film part in "Singing In the Rain".

Vincent Price's Richelieu was probably fine in 1948, but his subsequent ghoul movie and "Batman" fame works against him with today's viewers.

You won't recognize him in costume, but once you hear the half-witted Planchet speak you will say: "Hey that's Keenan Wynn". Unlike Price, Wynn's wide range of subsequent character roles don't undermine his performance.

"The Three Musketeers" is set in 17th century France as young D'Artagnan joins the three best swordsmen in Paris: Athos (Van Heflin), Porthos (Gig Young), and Aramis (Robert Coote).

Oz's Wizard, Frank Morgan, plays King Louis XIII, another astonishing bit is miscasting but the part is too small for that to be of much significance. The King and Richelieu are at odds over going to war with England, but Richelieu has the goods on the Queen (Angela Lansbury) and hopes to force a war.

There is action, romance, great production design, and an excellent underlying story. Unfortunately the humorous casting decisions make it extremely difficult to suspend disbelief and get into the film as anything more than an old movie. Turner's stuff has mock- fest potential but she is thankfully only a "supporting" character.

Then again, what do I know? I'm only a child.
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