Satan War (1979)
6/10
Not without it's bad points, but fun nonetheless.
4 October 2007
Warning: Spoilers
It took a long time for me to finally find this film and because of it's scarcity, I figured it was going to be terrible, and happily anticipated it to be as such. But instead I was treated to a dark brooding film in which every effort was put in with full sincerity. Sure, it lacks blood and gore but the best thing it does lack is humour. So many films have comedic relief and it really takes away from the films ultimate desired effect, that being to scare you or creep you out. Obviously this movie has its flaws though, or it would have a DVD release by now even in small quantities.

The beginning has a narration of the typical monotonic man explaining that this film is based on true events, though names have been changed and facts have been greatly dramatized. When you get to the end, you'll be wondering what the real facts were if any at all. We're introduced to our main (and only) characters to the story; Louise and Bill Foster whom have just bought their first house after living in a tiny apartment up until they got married. The tale of poltergeists kick in straight away with a freshly hung cross being turned upside down by unseen forces, the coffee pot starts spewing some odd chunky ooze and then the kitchen vomits blue gunk from several unrelated areas. And what's a haunted house story without the sexual assault performed by the ghosts on the silent woman of the house. When they come across the apparently putrid blue gunk, they don't even question how it's coming out of the dishwasher AND the cupboard, instead they merely pitch it into buckets using only their hands. When finally the culprit (or demon as the hired clairvoyant would suggest) is shown, we're treated to a humanoid shape in a black cloak wielding a knife. Yes, it's that strange. Louise makes him go away by holding up her beloved cross and they take off like a bat out of a relatively warm place.

So what made it enjoyable you ask? The use of straight suspense throughout is a theme not utilized very often, especially with new movies, and it's great to see terrorized characters despite the bad acting rather than be treated to overused 'funnymen' and teenage one-liners. The music is great synth stuff apparently created using only 6 keys and fits well into the scenes of possession. It does get repetitive though but hey, they heard something golden and stuck with it. The true moment of redemption for this film is the end. Now what I'm about to say isn't part of the movie, but a tacked-on short 'documentary' about voodoo and such. It lasts around 15 minutes and shows dancing voodoo experts conjuring up demons for Satan's army and the like while being narrated by the same expressionless man from the beginning. This was just too fun to ignore.

So if you can, watch this movie but by all means, don't expect a gratuitous nude scene, an exploding head, or fast-paced action. Think Amityville Horror toned down.
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