4/10
Winner of the 'Palme d'Awful', 1981.
10 July 2008
Joe Spinell and Caroline Munro, co-stars of William Lustig's grimy sleaze-fest Maniac, reunite for this tacky slasher that was shot almost entirely on location during the 1981 Cannes Film Festival, and, thanks to its technical shoddiness and pretty awful script, also feels like it was written, produced, and edited during those few weeks as well.

In typical slasher fashion, The Last Horror Film opens with a nekkid blonde being murdered in a hot tub, but, in the first of several plot twists (there is a double whammy right at the end), this death is quickly revealed to be a scene in a film that is being watched by Vinny Durand (Joe Spinell), a sweaty, lank-haired, delusional low-life who, infatuated with horror-star Jana Bates (Munro), travels to Cannes to try and convince the actress to appear in his non-existent movie.

When members of the cast and crew of Jana's latest flick (called Scream) begin to disappear, only to turn up dead several days later, the finger of suspicion naturally points to Vinny, the crazed, drooling fan who has been stalking poor Jana, but is he really responsible, or is someone else killing time by killing in Cannes?

Spinell, who was completely convincing as a deranged psycho in Maniac, fails to generate the fear this time, instead putting in a rather weak performance which sees him rapidly switching from 'threatening' to 'whimpering mummy's boy' in a rather laughable manner. However his performance is practically Oscar worthy when compared with that given by his real-life mum, Filomena Spagnuolo: she plays his on-screen mother and somehow even struggles to make this role convincing!

Also disappointing is Munro, an actress who usually compensates for her wooden acting by looking absolutely stunning; here, however, sporting big hair with blonde streaks, she looks far from her best (who the hell thought it would be a good idea to make her look like a cross between The Bride of Frankenstein and Elvira?). And she doesn't even get her kit off, despite a scene that requires her to run full pelt down several flights of stairs in nothing but a towel!

Fortunately, despite the iffy plot, and even iffier performances, The Last Horror Film isn't a COMPLETE waste of time: there are a couple of squishy murders (a throat slashing/decapitation and a bullet to the head); lots and lots of topless ladies (this is Cannes, after all!); clever references to some thematically appropriate current affairs stories (John Hinckley's assassination attempt on Reagan and the shooting of Pope John Paul II); and the film also acts as a nifty time-capsule—a reminder of days gone by, where titles like Cannibal Holocaust could be found adorning the billboards of sleazy flea-pits around the world.
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