1/10
Jings, Crivens, Help ma Boab! There's a Muckle Big Alien Boogle on Yon Moor.
2 November 2008
Warning: Spoilers
Dear Gods! this is a bad film with limited sets and fogbound, dark, please don't notice the studio wall, lighting with everyone returning to the same rock on the desolate moor more times than anyone can count. It also has some insanely stodgy dialogue of the sort more usual in dubbed Italian movies like this moment from when the scientists are trying to communicate with the alien.

Prof: We've got to reach him.

Doctor: Ah!

Prof:You have found a means of communication, Doctor?

Doctor: Yes... What's THE common denominator, professor? The basic and universal language? Geometry!

Prof: By George, Doctor! You've hit it! If anything should warrant success, this should!

Reporter: Excuse me, professor, you've lost me. I'm the shadowy figure in the left background with the stupid expression on his face - I don't get this mathematics...

And it's not just the scientists who talk like this. Even the police get to deliver this sort of garbage:

Inspector:Professor Elliot told you that planet would be within the Earth's gravitational orbit by midnight. The consequences of such an unparallelled proximity could be - - - anything. None of us knows what that... that enigma out on the moors might be planning.

Reporter: The Professor's theory was - invasion...

Inspector: We can't risk determining whether it has any fact. A Planet of such size coming so close to ours might cause a disastrous atmospheric upheaval as well.

No one says:"We can't risk determining whether it has any fact." it doesn't make any sense. I can only assume the actor garbled his line and, as this whole scene was done in one master shot, there was no way of cutting it.

But best of all were the 'Scottish' accents. Some of the most hilariously bad cod Scots ever committed to celluloid. They make the Simpsons' Groundskeeper Willie and Star Trek's Scotty characters sound vaguely authentic. Every R is rolled till it hurts. Sometimes the accents ladled on so think it's incomprehensible. I cannae tell whither it's the Scot's the mon is takin' or same of ye ither furrin tongue ye ken? Hoots mon.

Ach mon, will yea no be talking the blethers the noo?

Ach! That I am, laddie, that I am.
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