Where to begin.. This movie was so awful. I spent and hour and a half thinking it was going to eventually get better but, unfortunately, it still sucked. The actress was bitchy and unlikeable, and the actor was just straight up stupid. The movie started out with them snowmobiling out in to the middle of freaking winter frozen nowhere, when they see someone in the woods and proceed to crash and eat it; now if the movie would have ended right there I would have been happier with it than I am right now. They both stay in a tent for a little bit, with spooky noises and rustling sounds until the genius male lead decides to go out to investigate said typical spooky wood sounds. Naturally, he disappears, leaving the dumb female lead to fend for herself. We endure way too many nightmare sequences, all having people whipping around to face the camera with their jacked-up faces. Blah blah blah. This goes on for 45 minutes. The girl tries to find the boy, and finds a puddle of blood. And then cries. And backs away. And goes back to the tent. Again. By this point I was getting distracted by how much my hair had grown while I was waiting for something worth watching to happen. The movie goes on and on with the same things over and over again, a tree branch would break, she'd see something move, her mascara would be running down her face and then reapplied in the next shot. And then I FINALLY made it to the end. Which was LITERALLY THE STUPIDEST TWIST I HAVE EVER SEEN. I wanted to punch myself in the face for watching it. I would rather have my eyeballs pecked out by swordfish than watch that again.
Review of The Frozen
The Frozen
(2012)
Pretty much the most awful movie I've ever seen. ever.
28 April 2013
Warning: Spoilers