6/10
A bit plodding, but the action's great
4 August 2016
Warning: Spoilers
Yuen Biao's leading role and the promise of yet another titanic ding-dong between him and sparring partner Yuen Wah was enough to sell me THE ICEMAN COMETH, a 1989 Hong Kong film that takes HIGHLANDER's central premise and reinvents it with a Chinese spin. Unfortunately, the film is far from the cult classic that it has been advertised as, although it does have much to recommend it. The film features an unlikely combination of comedy and drama, pathos, and more familiar martial arts stunts and action.

Unfortunately the subject matter is very dark and the film is often depressing. The central villain is a rapist and at least one scene – a rape in a car – is done in incredibly bad taste, souring the experience of the film as a whole. Clocking in at one hour fifty minutes, the film is also very talky, and much of the dialogue centres around Maggie Cheung as the love interest. Cheung plays an obnoxious hooker, far from her sweet character in the POLICE STORY films. Here she's brash and unpleasant, unappealing to the viewer. Unfortunately much of the comedy centres around her instead of letting the male actors enjoy the type of physical hijinks so beloved of Jackie Chan and Sammo Hung.

While Cheung is an immediate detraction every time she's on screen, the film is bolstered by Yuen Biao's typically strong leading performance; he's a far better actor than Christopher Lambert, the man he imitates at times, and he ably handles the dramatic scenes along with the comedic ones – the sequence in which he drinks from a toilet bowl is hilarious, made more so by Biao's acting of the innocent. Biao is matched by Yuen Wah, never more evil than he is here as the villain. I have to say, though, that it's pretty odd to see the skinny Wah stripped to his underwear and showing off his muscles to a hooker. With two top martial artists in the film, you can guarantee some great fights, and the film doesn't disappoint in the action stakes.

Sword duels, a great battle on top of a car suspended in the air by a crane, and the top-notch one-on-one at the film's climax, which is set in a museum, certainly add up to counter the movie's deficiencies. The painful final fight is a particular keeper and the best showdown we've seen between Biao and Wah – their later chandelier ruckus in ONCE UPON A Chinese HERO is short and unspectacular in comparison. The film boasts some really good '80s animation that I'd choose over CGI any day. THE ICEMAN COMETH is a very different style film than we're used to from Hong Kong. With a better director and more action, it would have been a classic to rival DRAGONS FOREVER. As it is, it's an unwieldy movie with some great fights but a plodding storyline and Maggie Cheung's worst ever role.
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