2/10
A boring and pointless mess
10 September 2016
Warning: Spoilers
Twin Peaks has long since been at the top of my list of shows to watch if given the opportunity. And when that opportunity arose, I was very impressed with what I saw. The bizarre mix of humour and surrealism makes for one of the best and most underrated TV shows I've ever had the privilege to watch. I'd heard the film wasn't the best, but I've enjoyed a lot of films that have received harsh criticism, and I expected this one to be another one of those.

The first half an hour of this film was exactly what I was hoping for in this film. Even with his drastically reduced role, Kyle MacLachlan still manages to steal the screen for the few scenes he appears. And when he steps on the other side of the camera, David Lynch is always fun to watch as well. Add in a brief appearance by David Bowie to round things off, as well as a few Black Lodge residents, both new and old, and it's quite fun to watch. If the film had continued to be what this first act is, I'd have been impressed. Sadly, that's not the case.

The remainder of the film follows Laura Palmer's life before her murder. Sure, it's interesting seeing the events that led to Laura's death, and Sheryl Lee does a great job in the role, but it's all so pointless. The film shows us nothing we hadn't already learned from the series. It's an hour and a half of the same stuff, but somehow presented in a far less interesting way than what the TV show managed to do.

While not the worst film I've ever seen, it's possibly the most boring. It doesn't even feel like Twin Peaks. That playful and mysterious tone from the show is gone and replaced with, well, nothing really. It's like it doesn't even have a tone. It's just so dull.

I wouldn't say it does anything to detract from the TV series, but it certainly doesn't add anything to it. If you want to see the whole Twin Peaks saga, then go ahead and watch it. Just be warned that your in for quite a boring two hours and fifteen minutes. I can almost guarantee that halfway through the film you'll find yourself pulling out your phone to check Facebook or whatever. This film just doesn't do enough to keep the audience's attention.

I was hoping for answers to some of those unresolved plot threads from the TV series, but they certainly aren't here. I don't think a single plot thread from the show gets resolved by this film. Not one.

I think what bugs me most though is all the deleted scenes I keep reading about. It seems like this film got the Batman v. Superman treatment. A ridiculously long A+ film was shot, before having all the good bits cut out, leaving us with the lackluster bare bones of what we could have had. Sadly, a lot of the scenes that ended up on the cutting room floor sound like they could have made this movie into the kind of film I could have enjoyed. Instead, we just get two hours of Laura Palmer running around town high on drugs and screaming at shadows.

Oh, and if for some reason you've not seen the TV series and you're planning to watch this, don't. While being too much of a rehash of the same old stuff to appeal to fans of the show, it somehow still manages to be too continuity heavy to appeal to new viewers. The whole things really just a boring and pointless mess.

Here's hoping the 2017 TV series can do better, because a show like Twin Peaks deserves it.
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