oscaralbert Review of Jeepers Creepers

Jeepers Creepers (II) (1939)

Since Warner Bros.' Reason-to-Be is to Warn Americans . . .

[6/10 · 5 May 2017]

. . . (most often We Citizens of the (Then) Far Future) of our upcoming Calamities, Catastrophes, Cataclysms, and Apocalypti, when one of Warner's shorts or features spotlights a ghost among its main characters, we can surmise that Warner's prolific Prophets of Doom are working overtime to caution as about at least one prospective Dire Strait we'll soon be facing. Because JEEPERS CREEPERS only has TWO on-screen critters with speaking parts (not counting the frogs), we're treated to a scenario in which 50% of the cast is DEAD. This white specter is first shown smoking a cigar (and dunking his smoke rings into a cup of coffee!). Does this mean JEEPERS CREEPERS is a simple polemic against Big Tobacco? I think not. It's easy to overlook an earlier bit in which lightning fries the roaster weather vane atop the Haunted House into a cooked roast. Warner is telling us that America's goose will be toast IF we ever allow a traitorous minority to install Red Commie KGB Chief Vlad "The Mad Russian" Putin's puppet Rump into our White House. Just this morning on CNN Congresswoman Wasserman-Schultz of Florida estimated as least six million of our most loyal, patriotic, True Blue citizens--including many war heroes--will be rubbed out, liquidated, erased, slain, and murdered due to Putin's Rump Care bill passed yesterday (May the Force be With You, 2017). If memory serves, this is how many Jews Hitler burned up during the Holocaust. Perhaps Warner is forecasting with JEEPERS CREEPERS that we should expect a Rumpocaust Memorial to be erected on our National Mall 75 years from now.