When it comes to marriage I been down the alter three times. Yes that's What a i said. Three times. Two in front of a Rabbi and once in front of a judge of the court of New York State. Five separate novellas a bit dated for the contemporary viewer but I watched this movie twice and second impressions did some justice to this film. Basic story line, Two Golden agers, Newly appointed Justice of the Peace Melvin Bush (Victor Moore) and his Wife Mrs. Bush played by Jane Darwell receive a disturbing letter that reads that Five couple they married were not legal due to the fact that the justice's license wasn't processed while he married five couples at his residence. All five couple are notified with different set of circumstances. Marilyn Monroe plays a professional beauty pageant contestant and bread winner as Mrs. America but the letter states that she never married. Her husband Jeff (David Wayne), and babysitter realize she can't run as Mrs. America. Story number two has a popular radio couple live from their luxury penthouse sipping coffee and gossip about their past evenings together. Yet off the air neither one speaks to each other. Fred Allen and Ginger Rogers play their parts to perfection as this episode was very representative of today's celebrities. Our third portrait shows two of my favorite character actors Eve Arden and Paul Douglas as Katie and Hector Woodruff. Yet the sketch was promoting boredom in the extreme. Reason enough to take a trip to the kitchen or bathroom for a mild break. The fourth marriage mockery was my favorite and should be a benchmark for all elderly men marrying fast woman who are only out for their husbands wealth. Zsa Zsa Gabor sets up her husband (Louis Calhern) in an adultery scam. Caught on camera with witnesses, Zsa Zsa quickly with attorney by her side wants whats coming to them financially. Love the stunning reaction when the telegram comes in that exclaims that she was never married . The fifth and final entry was poignant as there's no question that Newly drafted Willie Fisher (Eddie Braken) and wife Patsy (Mitzi Gaynor)love each other deeply and are newly expected parents. Trouble is the fateful telegram is received after our new army recruit is in travel to his basic training center by train. Private Fisher doesn't want to go off to Korea without being legally married worried that he might not make it back and the shame and humiliation to the child that comes with it. Patsy travels on the next train as our desperate couple tries to straighten things out before the battle. When I thought about it, if I were to get married a third time I would use a fake Justice of the Peace rather than a prenuptial agreement. More discreet and effective if the true colors emerge from the newly appointed spouse.
Review of We're Not Married!
