2/10
I'm sorry.
6 October 2020
Warning: Spoilers
A mother and daughter have decided that a weekend away would be the best way for them to reconnect. So they head off to a house in the woods, unaware that this is a place that attracts only the worst in people.

Basically - never ever take a vacation.

Originally called Fake Flowers, this stars Helene Udy (Amityville Clownhouse, My Bloody Valentine) as the mother and Angela Barajas as the daughter. You'll see her naked just as often as you see establishing shots of the scenery, which go on so long that they take a life of their own and are no longer establishing shots. Hey - here's the daughter naked bathed in green light so you forget that!

Then again, the dialogue outright says, "Nobody cares about boobies. This is Oregon."

There's also an incestual brother and sister team who have nothing to do with the plot, but such is life in Oregon, one imagines. "Nobody cares about incest. This is Oregon."

This is the kind of movie that gets things like Lynchian thrown at it in the hopes that you'll watch it. I've already told you that it has basically sixty straight minutes of naked girl in it and if that doesn't sell you, the fact that it makes no sense and not because of talent won't get you to watch it either.
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